Leave your husband to find his own ways. I found that my children couldn't bond with their dad Until I facilitated it. Sounds like you have a good man. Instead of directing him try complimenting his efforts and walking away knowing your baby is in loving and calm hands.
We have a rule in our house. We never 'rescue' out baby from each other. Exactly who are we rescueing them from? A loving parent?????
What you are doing isn't working. It might be time for YOU to also try to put baby to sleep without using nursing. A baby who falls asleep with a boob in the mouth needs it all night. I know this! I was attached to Gabe for a long time. Lol!! It's a rough transition but so worth it!
BFing, CDing, all natural mama to three boys! Certified lactation Counselor