Thread: MIL help
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Old 12-08-2007, 09:22 PM   #2
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Re: MIL help

Oh boy your MIL sounds like my almost-MIL (I'm engaged lol). She's not anti-breastfeeding, really, but I kept hearing for a couple of months that she did it for the 'important' time, when she was in the hospital w/ the baby. Um, does that mean the REST of the time I breastfeed WON'T be important?
We live on their property, so for about a month she was coming by EVERY DAY and doing things like this: standing at the bottom of my stairs (my house is on top of my garage) and yelling "Are you breastfeeding up there or can I come up?" (NOT something to say to a new mom who is having bf issues!!) and telling me "You know, if he's crying, all you have to do is walk him around and he stops. See?" (not what I wanted to hear when my son kept me up 4 nights in a row and I was recovering from a c-section and had a hard time getting off my bed) and "I heard on the news, that all mothers who don't work and just stay home think 'Good, now I'll get all this stuff done' but then nothing gets done, so don't worry about what the house looks like" (from some one who only cleans their house for holidays...seriously). Among other wonderful gems.
She also expected that I would just hand over my son whenever she wanted to hold him, and actually got mad at me when I told her no! When he was about 6 weeks old she asked me if I held him alot, and I told her, 'yup, all day. He likes it.' She just looked at me and said "I can tell." ?What?
She owns a dairy farm with my SO's dad, and she kept telling me that I should drop the baby off (cuz you know, there's spare boobs lying around just waiting to feed him) and then go do what I wanted. Um, all I wanted was to be with my baby!
I keep hearing now that she's expecting DS will just walk himself over to their house all the time when he gets older (he's only 5 months) and he'll be so dirty I won't want him back. Again, what?
It got to the point of me standing up for myself, and then hearing my almost MIL tell me she wouldn't be stopping by any time soon until I got him on a schedule because I was such a miserable b*tch. Yeah. She's only come over I think once since then. I don't miss her.
Unfortunately, I can just say that you should stand up for yourself and your beliefs, and if your MIL doesn't like it, she can leave. It's your house, your baby, your life. She needs to realize that. And I personally would get a sling or something to carry the baby in and tell them that the baby will scream all day if they aren't in it. Tell her it stresses the baby out when she cries like that. Lie if you need to. Some people don't take hints well.
I definitly feel for you! I don't get why other people still think they know better how to care for our babies then we do! Good luck!
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