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Old 05-10-2006, 02:25 PM   #17
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Re: Pregnancy Loss Thread...

to all of the mom's who have posted their stories here.

I got pregnant the first time by suprise. That pregnancy went beautifully minus a bump at the end with pre-e. My son was born healthy and happy. So when I found out shortly after his second birthday that I was again pregnant I was a bit shocked, but I figured we could do it. The first 22 weeks went by perfectly. I had some morning sickness which led me to the conclusion that we were having a girl and my suspicion was confirmed at the 20 wk ultrasound. There was a bit of concern when the tech couldn't find her bladder or kidneys, but we were assured that this was not uncommon if the baby had recently urinated. We were set up for a more indepth ultrasound with a perinatalogist for a few weeks later but left with the feeling that all was well. We never made it to the appt. Just past 22wks I got sick. I thought I had caught the flu from some kids I had been babysitting, but over the course of the day it got worse. My temperature spiked to 103 and I couldn't feel my daughter moving. I called the midwifes office, but no one returned my call. By early the next morning I was even worse. I couldn't get my fever to come down with tylenol and I was panicky about not feeling any movement. I finally got ahold of the on call midwife and was told to head to the L&D floor. After several hours of first tracking a heartbeat that turned out to be mine, and then a run arround because the midwife didn't want to come to the hospital I was told that my daughter had died and I needed an emergency induction or I might die as well. 2.5 hrs later I delivered my baby girl. She weighed 1lb 3 ozs and was perfect in every way. There was nothing wrong with her. I had developed an infection called Chorioamnionitis, and it had killed my baby. I was too weak to get out of bed, but we kept her with us for 4 hrs. We took pictures and cried. I arranged her funeral from the hospital bed. I nearly died that night, but they finally managed to get my fever back down. The infection had moved into my blood and it took several days for me to be released from the hospital.

Arawyn's funeral was on Christmas eve. We had her cremated and her ashes are on the mantle in a little urn. When I die I want her ashes to be mixed with mine. She only ever lived inside my body, and I feel like that is where she should return.

I wound up needing a D&C several months later to remove a piece of retained placenta. After that we started TTCing. It took 11 months but we finally became pregnant with our second son. His pregnancy was so hard. I was constantly afraid that I would lose him. But early in the morning on December 1st he was born healthy and weighing in at 8lbs 9ozs. His placenta had grown over the scar from my D&C and I almost bled out when it tore after his delivery. I feel so blessed every day to have him in my life. He and his brother are my reason for still being here. But it was my daughter that made me strong.
ShannonInk'd, Atheist, Liberal, Part Time Large Equipment Mechanic, HS-ing, Mum to ASD Ninja Kearnan (8-4-01) & Derby Boy Tharen (12-1-05)
Always remembering Arawyn Born Silently (12-21-03)
Crocheted longies/shorties, toys and more see samples Arawyn's Garden Crochet
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