Haven't read the whole thread...
Bottom line: FEED YOUR BABY. I don't care how you do it, just feed him/her. It makes them stop crying from hunger, ya know?
I have seen SOME of the nastiness you mention, but it's usually just trolls or people looking to stir the pot.
For me personally, I'm very much pro-BFing because I think it's best for my family, but the bottom line is it is just the way I choose to feed my baby. I respect and admire mamas who choose to or are forced to FF. To me, I am not higher than them for going my route nor do I feel inferior to them for going theirs.
Again... JUST FEED THE KID!!!!!!
As for asking, I may ask out of curiosity if it seems the mama wants to vent about the why, but honestly, beyond that, it's her business not mine.