Re: how much could you handle doing it solo?
I know I am late on this, but I wanted to give you some big hugs
I think as far as how much can you handle being solo, sounds like you are ALREADY doing solo, but on top of that dealing with the frustration and dissapointment because he is supposed to be contributing. At least if you are on your own, you know it, and know that it is 100% up to you to do it all.
I am so sorry you are going through this, i have a few friends who have gone through something similar and I know it is really tough. Maybe, just maybe, having you walk out with the kids will make him realize that a change in tune is in order, but maybe not. So if you walk (with the kids of course) just be prepared that either he will come begging back (and then you must decide if you are willing to try again after the hurt) or that he might wave goodbye and go on living his lifestyle.
Regardless of your decisions, we are here to support you!