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Old 03-02-2010, 02:04 PM   #14
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Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: with three little monkeys
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Re: WWYD? Second child

If you're both not sure, I'd keep the conversation open. We had always planned on 3 (at least), but when DS was a year, we weren't sure yet if we wanted another. My FIL had just died, and DW was a wreck; I had just taken my PhD comprehensive exams and was looking towards my dissertation; and DS was amazing, and we weren't sure about diverting attention away from him then. We just wanted some more time just the three of us. And then, when he turned two and things had settled down a bit, and he was more independent, it became clear to us that we were ready, and our daughter was born on DS's 3rd birthday.

I knew as soon as DD was born that I wanted a 3rd, but DW wasn't sure. I didn't bring it up; I let her think about it and talk about it, and we've decided to ttc #3. In an ideal world, we'd wait to try until DD was 2, so that there would be a closer to 3 year difference (at least) between DD and #3, but DW is turning 4 in May, so time is of the essence for us.

We have friends who were convinced that they would only have one child; they were both only children and very happy about it. Hanging around our daughter as a nb changed their minds, and they're now expecting their 2nd. I wouldn't make any firm decisions at this point. Just keep enjoying your DS, and see what happens. You may find that in 6 months you're ready to ttc#2, or that you both feel your family is complete.
SAHD to J 12.27.05, M 12.27.08, and A 2.15.11.
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