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Old 06-05-2008, 11:21 PM   #3
shanmarie's Avatar
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Join Date: May 2008
Location: FTW Tx native, living in Norfolk Va!
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Re: Another birthmom questions thread

I can give you my experience as its all I know of personally. When I decided to do the adoption, I knew I was doing the right thing for everyone involved as it seems she does too. I was perfectly willing and ready to do just pictures and letters and I told them that at our first meeting. I was pretty much flaberghasted when they offered more. It really worked out for the best and I understand where you are coming from on that aspect. At this point, I would just leave the ball in her court. Let her know that whatever she is comfortable with is fine with you. She may further down the road want some pictures and letters or more contact. I know that for the first six months that the pictures and letters came thru the agency from them and then it was up to us what we wanted to do. I cant remember for sure, but I think it was required that they sent the pics for the first six months, but I could be wrong. I think that you are doing what is right for your situation at the moment. I have a cousin that placed a child for open adoption but she wasnt/isnt very comfortable with pictures because she doesnt see her child as hers so why would she want pics of the child. Maybe that is where the birthmom is at in her thinking. She may change her mind about the amount of contact when the baby is born.

I wish you lots of luck with the pending placement and please let us know how it all goes!!!
Shannon-proud Navy wife to Josh, loving mommy to Addison (4), Preston (2) and Cameron Bailey born 10/16/08 Proud to be Kate's-greeneyes lil sis!
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