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Old 12-10-2012, 12:03 PM   #21
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Re: I need ideas for the proper punishment for 11 y/o for lying

Originally Posted by cdeweese View Post
I agree with previous posters about no unsupervised time, period. Pick an amount of time that you know what you can be available 24/7 (a week, etc). Just remember that means you're grounded too lol! I know a lot of parents will hand out punishments without realizing how much it will impact themselves, then not follow through. It sounds like she's a good girl just being a preteen
I wanted to address this as I make it a point to ensure that my child's consequences don't inadvertantly punish ME. The idea is that the kid follows me around instead of me hovering over him. He doesn't get to do anything unless it fits into my schedule of housework and leisure.

Here's an example of how it has worked with us:
Wake time I walk into his room and tell him to pull his clothes out and bring them with him to my room. He gets dressed in my room while I get myself dressed and ready. He brushes his teeth next to me while I brush mine. When I'm ready to go downstairs, he has to go as well, whether or not he's managed to fully clothe himself. He can bring his socks with him and finish up. He has to stay in the kitchen with me and get breakfast ready. Then he has to stay once he's done while I finish making lunches, snacks, and eating my breakfast. He doesn't get to go down to the car ahead of me with his siblings. He has to wait for me to put on my jacket and start the dishwasher.

If he complains about boredom, I hand him a broom or dishrag and put him to work. If a younger sibling needs my attention during this process (let's say my 4yo poops and needs help), he has to put down whatever he's doing (sweeping, eating, ) and follow me. If he needs to toilet, he has to wait until I get to a stopping place and I will stand outside the open door. If he has a chore to do, he has to wait until I happen to go where he needs to be to do it.
Melissa-Wife, mother to DS 4/02 and DD 4/07, DS 7/08 DD 7/13
ISO: my lost shaker of salt

Last edited by mcpforever; 12-10-2012 at 12:04 PM.
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