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Old 03-20-2007, 12:43 PM   #9
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onyxxmoon
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Join Date: Oct 2006
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Re: Very Serious Subject - I need help with please !!

My so-called-father (he is my 'birth' father- but nothing more than that b/c he is dead as far as i'm concerned) sexually molested and abused me from a ver, very young age-- I'm talking under 2 years old here- And I have tried MANY MANY times to have a relationship with him- BUT he REFUSES to seek help of any kind. Or even admit he is wrong, or made a mistake! And as an adult, there is no way I can have a healful relationship with ANYONE- let alone my own father, if they can't even admit to making mistakes!
I had attempted to have a relationship with him in my adult life several times, the last being before I got pregnant with my now 16 month old son... But shortly after finding out I was pregnant, I became sickened to my core about how could anyone hurt a child in that way?!? I just couldn't bear the thought of someone harming the little being inside of me! Let alone my own family! So, I stopped talking to him for the final time.... Once he finally realized I wasn't speaking with him anymore, he never called or wrote again-- But, I feel better now knowing my sweet, son won't ever be harmed by him... Because NO ONE can change you if you don't want to change yourself! And from here on out, it is about me and MY family's wellbeing- And I continue to work on letting go of him, and my past....
I am there witrh you- and please, please let me know if you need someone to talk to! Or any more advice about what has helped me to let go.... Much, much love to you mama... Please take care of yourself... Sarah Lena
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Sarah Lena - Wife to my DH Thomas and mama to two boys- 8yrs. and 4 yrs.- and baby girl due April 28th 2014!!!!
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