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Old 01-23-2013, 09:10 AM   #3
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Originally Posted by escapethevillage View Post
This is going to sound offensive. But, I have always felt like it's their parents. Less is expected of boys than girls as children.

Video games have been a part of their lives since they were, when they have some time, they want to play video games, and they stay up half the night, then want to sleep in because they didn't get to bed on time, so they don't spend as much time on the family commitments. Men often see that "going to work" is the only contribution they should make. Even if their wife works, she is still expected to do all of the other things.

I have friends with grown sons, and they were babied, rescued, never given consequences, never expected to help around the house, etc. One friend hired two men from outside of Home Depot (complete strangers) picked them up, brought them to her house just so they could go in the attic and get her Christmas ornaments down for her. While her 17 and 21 yr old sons sat on the couch playing video games. She hired someone to mow her lawn when she was on food stamps too, she couldn't afford to pay her bills, but her boys were not going to do manual labor.

They are understandably useless adults now. Way more extreme than most, but, you get the idea. We need to expect more from boys while they are boys, and all the daughters in law will appreciate it later.
While I totally agree with you, I'm also kind of lost. Your extreme example is exactly how I was raised. I never had any chores, never had to work or earn anything, never cooked for myself, etc etc. The first time I lived on my own I had to look up YouTube videos about how to clean a floor. I still have to Google a LOT of things.

But now I'm a domestic goddess, if I may say. But why was it I that had to have a total transformation while dh claims he "just doesn't see" the mess?
Emma H&T Mama to Faolan 6/7/12 & Malachy 1/29/14
Mary born into heaven at 14 weeks
Cautiously expecting #4 10/6/16
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