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Old 07-31-2011, 04:53 PM   #1
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Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

I'm reading through the "why do SAHM think they work harder" thread (no, I won't reply and bump it ) and it seems like almost all working moms hate that they have to work and would love to be a SAHM. Having no kids yet, I obviously am far removed from that debate. However, I grew up with a mom who worked and loved it. She adored her career and always preferred it to staying home. My grandma was the same way, which was unusual for her time. I clearly can't predict how I'll be when I become a mom, but for many reasons it's unlikely that I'd ever be a long-term SAHM (obviously short of unforeseen circumstances, at this point who knows if I'll be a forever SAHM or WOHM from the beginning). I must admit, I've loved working my entire life and have a mom who loved having a career, so the thought of ever being utterly miserable and hating my life doesn't sound appealing.

What is it? Do most WOHMs truly hate working? Is it more that they feel like it's socially unacceptable to say "I work by choice and love it"?
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Last edited by MyLovely; 07-31-2011 at 05:01 PM. Reason: Wow, totally messed up the name of the thread I was reading. Wow! Where's my brain?!
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Old 07-31-2011, 05:04 PM   #2
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

I love my job and love working, but I would definitely like to spend more time with my son. I don't think I'm cut out to be a SAHM because I think I'd go a little nuts.
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Old 08-02-2011, 05:04 AM   #3
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

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I love my job and love working, but I would definitely like to spend more time with my son. I don't think I'm cut out to be a SAHM because I think I'd go a little nuts.
This exactly. I think I am a better parent because I have my time do work at a profession that I love (pharmacist) and when I get home, the kids are happy to see me and we spend quality time together.
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Old 08-02-2011, 08:29 PM   #4
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I love my job and love working, but I would definitely like to spend more time with my son. I don't think I'm cut out to be a SAHM because I think I'd go a little nuts.
This. I teach, and I AM a bit crackers especially come this time of the summer. I love my job, and can't imagine giving it up unless it meant the safety of my family. However, I also have a WONDERFUL woman who watches ds, and you can CLEARLY see he loves being there. If I wasn't 100% sure of my childcare situation, I'd quit in a heartbeat.

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Old 08-17-2011, 12:52 PM   #5
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

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I love my job and love working, but I would definitely like to spend more time with my son. I don't think I'm cut out to be a SAHM because I think I'd go a little nuts.
this is me. In the perfect world, I'd work part time (at FT income) and make my own schedule. I love my girls to death but enjoy the adult time, being productive, making money and the peace and quiet of my own office. Nothing beats the cheers, hugs and smiles when I come home from work. I hate missing out of playgroups, special events and more because of work. Though I'm very, very lucky to have a job that allow me certain flexibility.
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Old 09-02-2011, 01:55 PM   #6
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

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I love my job and love working, but I would definitely like to spend more time with my son. I don't think I'm cut out to be a SAHM because I think I'd go a little nuts.


I like my job. Alot. I just don't think that I'm cut out to be a SAHM. My husband would quit his job tomorrow if I made enough to support us. He wants to be a SAHD. And I would be totally ok with that. The only thing I wish for right now is that I wish I didn't have to be away from her for 12+ hours a day. And sometimes I have to work from home. It comes with the territory. (I work as a Geoscientist and sometimes that means working on call.)
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Old 07-31-2011, 05:28 PM   #7
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

I think it depends on the job and also the person. When DS 1 one little I hated my job but had to work because I was a single mom. Now I love my job and normally look forward to going to work. When we first moved her and my SO was working I was staying at home with the children. I loved being able to see them all the time but I don't think I could do it forever. I would miss being a chef.
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Old 07-31-2011, 05:37 PM   #8
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I like being a part time WOHM. I actually liked being a full time WOHM, but it's less stressful now. This way when DH is home we can have lots of family time instead of running errands and going to the grocery store. I don't have to work, but I do like spending time with adults not talking about kids. I also like getting to use my education and thinking about things besides dinner and coupons. It gives me a lot of self esteem and something to talk about with my husband. In my head being a full time SAHM sounds great, but in reality I'm a better mom be getting a break from my kids. Aldo since my son is shy school has been really good for him too.
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Old 07-31-2011, 05:48 PM   #9
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

I have been on ALL points on the spectrum of full time SAHM and full time WOHM. When my oldest was little, I liked being a WOHM. I didn't necessarily always LOVE my job, but I really never thought I would really want to be a SAHM. I tended to waste time when I had too much of it, working sucked up time and required me to be a good time manager. I was more productive because I had to be to get it all done.
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Old 07-31-2011, 05:53 PM   #10
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

It's just now that DD is getting to be a bigger girl (17 mos) that I don't want to go to work. Part of that is that we found a WONDERFUL sitter who we both felt completely comfortable leaving DD with...in fact, she was probably better at dealing with an infant than we were. Now...well, DD would benefit from more socialization, more structure...and somebody who says "No" occasionally . And DP has returned to school, so DD sees a lot less of her. I don't love my job, and I feel guilty that DD sees so little of us. Realistically, though, I know how much women lose professionally when they take childrearing leave...I know that if I took a year or two off, I lose significantly more than that professionally...I'd guess somewhere around five years, rather than the actual 1-2. I'm not really willing to give that up. Ideally, a decent paying PT gig would be what I'm looking for. It might actually be do-able when DP finishes school, so here's hoping...

DP has been clear since before the baby was born that she wasn't cut out for staying home. She loves her job, she's good at it, and the time away from DD makes her a better mom.
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