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Old 09-08-2011, 11:12 PM   #1
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a non-traditonal family here...

Hey folks.

ya know.. since this is a non-traditional fmaily forum, and i like beign around here, i figure i should introduce myself.

Hi! i am Justina, 28, have one Beautiful daughter Caya, 2.5 and another daughter on the way. I have a boyfriend who is mostly awesome, Patrick. He also has a boyfriend.. named S. for the sake of simplicity here, not sharing his name, as not my place to out him to everyone.

anyways, we are not a triad. we have what we refer to as a Poly-v relationship. Patrick is our common point. we are poly, and have a open relationship.

Depending on your option of open and poly, we prolly don't fit anywhere. and man, am i ever tired of hiding this relationship from people on here. so here i am. laying it out in the open.

Ugh, i have written this out so many times this this forum opened. my apologies if i sound angry/annoyed with having to hide this relationship. we are not quiet in our day to day life of the relationship i am a part of. hiding it anywhere else seems wrong.. or just excluding parts of it seems wrong in my mind... well.. Here we go from here!


Hi Everyone!
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Old 09-09-2011, 06:37 AM   #2
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Re: a non-traditonal family here...

Glad there's a place for you now Justina. I know you've been a very loud advocate for this forum and I'm glad you finally have it. WELCOME!
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Old 02-17-2012, 04:11 PM   #3
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Re: a non-traditonal family here...

Welcome and thanks for sharing your story. BTW, I could totally see myself in that type of relationship. I don't know why, I just can.
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Old 09-09-2011, 06:44 AM   #4
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Re: a non-traditonal family here...

I completely understand how frustrating it can be to feel like you have to hide a part of your life. I'm poly (part of a quad- my wife and our two male partners) and while we are mostly open about it in real life- introducing it into any situation is always tricky and I always feel that nervous hesitation.

Nice to know I'm not alone on the board Yay!
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Old 10-04-2011, 07:05 PM   #5
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Re: a non-traditonal family here...

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Originally Posted by blathnat View Post
I completely understand how frustrating it can be to feel like you have to hide a part of your life. I'm poly (part of a quad- my wife and our two male partners) and while we are mostly open about it in real life- introducing it into any situation is always tricky and I always feel that nervous hesitation.

Nice to know I'm not alone on the board Yay!
I'm curious, if you don't mind sharing.. how does that work?

Are each of the relationships separate in a way? Or is everybody "with" everybody..

Example.. Let's call y'all Woman A, Woman B, Man A and Man B.

Is it like Woman A is with Woman B AND Man A?
Or is Woman A with Woman B, Man A AND Man B?
Are Man A and B in any kind of intimate relationship with each other? Or only with the women?

Does that make sense? LOL And sorry if it's too nosey, I'm just curious?

Also.. how the heck does that happen? Does Wife A one day walk up to Wife B and say "I love you, but I want a man also?" And Wife B says "Ok honey, sounds great, IF I can have a man all my own?" LOL

Again.. just curious and I hope my question actually make sense. LOL

God bless!
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Old 09-09-2011, 04:30 PM   #6
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Re: a non-traditonal family here...

We're a non-traditional family too! We're a bit more complicated though...to simplify it we are on the verge of poly, DH is poly curious so to speak and someday we will make the step towards probably a poly-v type of relationship. Our relationship is also a dominant and submissive relationship. We're pretty open in our day to day life and I'm open about my relationship on one of my other boards so I figured I might as well be open on here too.
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Old 09-09-2011, 05:05 PM   #7
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Re: a non-traditonal family here...

@lemurkinsmommy We started out that way.. but since being a mom. i had to stand my ground on alot more issues then i thought i would.. like Yelling at the kids is NOT okay. i try to be a more peaceful parent then what our parents were.

i love being poly -V it's great when you just need. a. darn. break. so you can send them off to someone else's bed for a bit and get the king size to yourself. and i always told my parents i never wanted a full time boyfriend. they are too needy. so this works out even better.

@blathnat this is so true. introducing it to anyone has always been a nervous point for us. my family did not take it so well. my boyfriends family just shrugged their shoulders. my friends all seem accepting of it so far. even the ones from the elementary days.
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Old 09-09-2011, 07:20 PM   #8
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Re: a non-traditonal family here...

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@lemurkinsmommy We started out that way.. but since being a mom. i had to stand my ground on alot more issues then i thought i would.. like Yelling at the kids is NOT okay. i try to be a more peaceful parent then what our parents were.
that's why ours is a much more complicated relationship, there are things that we have an equal power base (ie child rearing) and things that we don't, I like to think that we have a semi 1950's style of household.
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Old 09-09-2011, 08:43 PM   #9
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Re: a non-traditonal family here...

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that's why ours is a much more complicated relationship, there are things that we have an equal power base (ie child rearing) and things that we don't, I like to think that we have a semi 1950's style of household.
Makes sense really, i need to try to get back into letting control go more. darn these mommy hormones making me get all grumpy. and pushy, and not taking nothing from no one.
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Old 09-10-2011, 08:42 AM   #10
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Re: a non-traditonal family here...

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Makes sense really, i need to try to get back into letting control go more. darn these mommy hormones making me get all grumpy. and pushy, and not taking nothing from no one.
I hear ya, been there, alot You eventually work it out, we've had to learn to be flexible in our dynamic, not everything is black and white there's alot of grey areas when it comes to raising a family.
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