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Old 03-09-2012, 02:39 AM   #1
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I did not want to spend my next pregnancy terrified

but I am.

I had a horrible birth last time that ended in emergency c section. I am terrified of birting and the idea of vbac.

I am equally terrified of having a repeat c section in a country that gives you ibuprofen post op and does not use pain meds. I do not even know if it is an option, my last obgyn said if I wanted another c section I would have to pay out of pocket as it would be elective not needed.

I am not happy to be pregnant. I am scared. I did not even know if I wanted to have more kids after DS and I am terrified of spending my whole pregnancy in fear.
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Old 03-09-2012, 03:18 AM   #2
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Re: I did not want to spend my next pregnancy terrified

What happened during your first labor? What was the reason for your c-section? I had a c-section with my first. I hated it, they put me under general because they couldn't get the epidural in. It was awful. I educated myself on the pros and cons of a VBAC and I am soooo happy I did. I can answer any questions you might have? What scares you about a VBAC?
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Old 03-09-2012, 03:19 AM   #3
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Re: I did not want to spend my next pregnancy terrified

wait,,,,are you pregnant? I am trying to decipher your post, LOL!
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Old 03-09-2012, 03:26 AM   #4
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Re: I did not want to spend my next pregnancy terrified

Hey, yes I am pregnant. About 5 and a half week, due in November.

I do not know exactly what happened last time, my new obgyn has requested my medical records to look over the chain of events.

Short version is my water broke, then said I was not progressing fast enough then induced, I got to 4cm got an epidural and then they slammed me with more induction meds. I ended up havinga full blown panic attack screaming how terrified I was and for someone to help me, they cgave me valium to shut me up, said I was to weak and would geta n elective c section when the doc had time, gave meds to stop contractions and when they finally started doing surgical prep like shaving they chcked me and my cervix was swollen shut and I was in the op with the head surgeon out of bed less then 20 minutes later. The epidermal did not work and I was put under general anesthesia.

I am scared of having a panic attack again and not being able to deliver. I am scared of the pain of delivery. I am scared of once again being in delivery and being scared and feeling like no one is listening when I say something is wrong. I am even more scared about vbac with the risk of uterine rupture.
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Old 03-09-2012, 03:31 AM   #5
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Re: I did not want to spend my next pregnancy terrified

It sounds like you could really use the help of a doula, there are a lot of people in training that do births for free. I am not at all trying to suggest that your experience was not horrible, but maybe having someone else there for you to focus on and calm you might help things work out differently. Panic attacks can kick anybody down and when you are already having so many hormone changes as one does during labor, I just cannot even imagine.
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Old 03-09-2012, 03:35 AM   #6
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Re: I did not want to spend my next pregnancy terrified

I am overseas, doulas are not common here, I only found 2 doula in all of germany on the german website

Midwives are the norm here. My last midwife was satan incarant
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Old 03-09-2012, 03:44 AM   #7
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Re: I did not want to spend my next pregnancy terrified

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Originally Posted by Serenajean1 View Post
I am overseas, doulas are not common here, I only found 2 doula in all of germany on the german website

Midwives are the norm here. My last midwife was satan incarant
When you say midwives are the norm, do you mean lay midwives or CNMs who work in the hospital? Do you have a friend who has a strong personality who could be a labor partner and advocate for you this time around? Having a doula saved me from a repeat c-section.
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Old 03-09-2012, 03:58 AM   #8
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Re: I did not want to spend my next pregnancy terrified

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Originally Posted by DalesWidda View Post
When you say midwives are the norm, do you mean lay midwives or CNMs who work in the hospital? Do you have a friend who has a strong personality who could be a labor partner and advocate for you this time around? Having a doula saved me from a repeat c-section.
They train midwives here to handle all traditional births, I am not sure if vbac would fall under a medical birth, but in such a case if it did you get who ever is on duty at the clinic.

Your own dr does not come like in the us. I had a birth plan last time and they told me births cannot be planned.
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Old 03-09-2012, 04:04 AM   #9
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Re: I did not want to spend my next pregnancy terrified

Quote:
Originally Posted by Serenajean1 View Post
They train midwives here to handle all traditional births, I am not sure if vbac would fall under a medical birth, but in such a case if it did you get who ever is on duty at the clinic.

Your own dr does not come like in the us. I had a birth plan last time and they told me births cannot be planned.
oh my goodness, I have no advice then . Wow, things are sooo different there. So you probably couldn't even have a doula in there. Can you have more than one person in there leading up to the birth? Maybe having an extra support person would be helpful in that case. Why couldn't you have a midwive at home? Is it because you had a c-section the first time around or are you too afraid to attempt a homebirth (which I would completely understand, just curious).

Education is probably your best preparation at this point. If you can't control which doctor will be with you and you can't even make a birth plan then at least arm yourself with enough knowledge that you can feel a little more in control. Having little knowledge about a situation is only going to keep you fearful about the situation. Maybe there are other moms in your area that you could talk to? Or just keep coming on here and we will all help the best we can to ease your mind. Try not to stress too much, you need to stay healthy, both physically and emotionally for you and the baby.
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Old 03-09-2012, 03:36 AM   #10
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Re: I did not want to spend my next pregnancy terrified

Ugh. That really sucks. Is it at all a possibility to "go home" to have your baby?
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