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Old 07-01-2012, 04:29 PM   #1
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do you get alot of unwanted advice?

i never knew that when i became pregnant i would get so much advice from my family. most times i had already read up about it so everything they continue to say is old news to me. i am curious to know if they do this simply because my fiancé and i are both 20 and still young. what ever the case my lo is happy as a clam and a very calm content baby.

do you guys get alot of unwanted advice? if so how do you handle it? do you listen to them or do your own thing?
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Old 07-01-2012, 04:33 PM   #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cassie.sattler
i never knew that when i became pregnant i would get so much advice from my family. most times i had already read up about it so everything they continue to say is old news to me. i am curious to know if they do this simply because my fiancé and i are both 20 and still young. what ever the case my lo is happy as a clam and a very calm content baby.

do you guys get alot of unwanted advice? if so how do you handle it? do you listen to them or do your own thing?
It's every first time parent who gets advice. My favorite is get sleep now!

I listen with half an ear. If it's something really horrible, I smile and nod and change the subject.
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Old 07-01-2012, 04:41 PM   #3
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Re: do you get alot of unwanted advice?

Part of it is that you are first time parents and part of it is that giving advice is how people make conversation with parents. Parents like to talk about their kids and other folks commiserate, sympathize, give advice, and generally talk about their own kids in response, as part of the conversation. It's generally not something to take offense at.
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Old 07-01-2012, 08:08 PM   #4
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Re: do you get alot of unwanted advice?

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Originally Posted by happysmileylady View Post
Part of it is that you are first time parents and part of it is that giving advice is how people make conversation with parents. Parents like to talk about their kids and other folks commiserate, sympathize, give advice, and generally talk about their own kids in response, as part of the conversation. It's generally not something to take offense at.
this x 1000

people are just trying to talk to you about something that they think might interest you.

I think they're trying to be nice. So, I generally respond as nicely as possible. If their parenting idea is one that I definitely do not like, I still respond nicely like 'I really think DD prefers.... ' or whatever.
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Old 07-01-2012, 08:10 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by happysmileylady
Part of it is that you are first time parents and part of it is that giving advice is how people make conversation with parents. Parents like to talk about their kids and other folks commiserate, sympathize, give advice, and generally talk about their own kids in response, as part of the conversation. It's generally not something to take offense at.
So true! Just listen and smile, say thank you...no one is trying to be malicious or discredit you, they just want to share and relate to you. You should only listen to your gut...
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Old 07-01-2012, 05:05 PM   #6
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Re: do you get alot of unwanted advice?

All the time. I still get unwanted advice and I am 36 with 3 kids. Recently I was told I should bring my stroller as it would be less of a hassle than my sling. My stroller is a pain in the butt to bring with us. My sling is so easy to use and takes up no space as I just leave it on.

I am breastfeeding and was told I should just extract milk to feed when out and about instead of stopping to feed baby. Never mind I told them my lo doesn't know what to do with a bottle.
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Old 07-01-2012, 05:51 PM   #7
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Re: do you get alot of unwanted advice?

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All the time. I still get unwanted advice and I am 36 with 3 kids. Recently I was told I should bring my stroller as it would be less of a hassle than my sling. My stroller is a pain in the butt to bring with us. My sling is so easy to use and takes up no space as I just leave it on.

I am breastfeeding and was told I should just extract milk to feed when out and about instead of stopping to feed baby. Never mind I told them my lo doesn't know what to do with a bottle.
i hate when that happens. crunchy mamas dont stand a chance! the sling is soooo much nicer but we had to buy a stroller so if people babysat or took owen places they wouldnt have to "break their back" with a sling... so they got a gigantic stroller instead. my mom got my an "udder cover" and i have to wrestle it to the ground with my kid to try and cover everything so i decided to give it a proper burial in the donate bin.. if someone sees my nipple to damn bad!
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Old 07-01-2012, 05:45 PM   #8
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Yep, doesn't matter how old you are or how many kids you have, unwanted advice will always be readily available. Just smile and nod, most of the time they're just trying to be helpful.
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Old 07-01-2012, 05:54 PM   #9
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Re: do you get alot of unwanted advice?

Not really. I nipped that in the bud with my mom. If she offered her 30 year old parenting advice I told her why it was wrong, outdated, etc. She stopped.

Luckily, my MIL never really offered any advice (she had a MIL who was always criticizing her...). So, never had to worry about her.
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Old 07-01-2012, 07:04 PM   #10
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Re: do you get alot of unwanted advice?

I actually like getting advice. I have gleaned some great advice on here. I take what I like and forget what I don't. I have to try hard to not give advice though. I"m always so eager to share things that have worked for me.
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