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Old 07-29-2012, 07:14 PM   #1
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UGH! Thinking about switching to public/private school for awhile?!

Sooo, I am an avid homeschooling mom. I love ALL things about it but I'm starting to feel like I'm failing my kids. DS is 8 1/2, DD1 is 4 1/2, DD2 is 19 months, and I'm expecting a LO in Feb.
DS is very smart and very studious. He reads chapter books, knows tons of science knowledge(that's been his favorite and hes learned a lot reading on his own). My older 2 are into soccer and basketball. We have a great homeschool support group. Many families at our church homeschool and we go on outings/field trips together.
But I feel like I'm not able to give the one on one teaching time that's needed. DD1 is very demanding of my time and attention as is DD2. And with #4 on the way its going to be worse. I think DS is failing to thrive curriculum wise because I don't have the time he needs. It worked great when DD1&2 napped I focused on school. Now with DD1 not napping its becoming more chaotic. I havent ever found a good balance between school and housekeeping. I feel like one takes away from the other. Our house seems to stay messy so I'm always cleaning, doing laundry, etc...
I've been considering putting DS and DD1 in a magnet school. It's a public school but has a focus on youth performing arts, along with sports and so on.
I have MANY worries that I'm sure any parent would have. But my biggest is that I don't want them to loose out on a Jesus based atmosphere. We don't have the $ to do private school. DD1 is very active and likes to be independent and constantly doing something. I don't want that to hurt her in a more confined atmosphere. DS is very laid back and loves to learn but he has tendencies to be a follower sometimes. I don't want him to change his drive to learn or start following wrong behavior.
I really like the idea of having extra time with my youngest and the newbie but dont want it to hurt the others. It makes me feel selfish
If I choose to go the magnet school route it would be to try it out. I'm really scared! I've hated seeing such little kids being sent off into the world. I have trust issues too.
I don't know if I should try it with DS first since he's older or DD1 too. She would go to all day preschool.
DH is supportive either way but I just don't know what to do
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Old 07-29-2012, 07:26 PM   #2
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Re: UGH! Thinking about switching to public/private school for awhile?!

((((big hugs))))

I don't have words of advice, but I want you to know you are not alone. My oldest is the only one doing school (kindy... year round) and I have 3 younger ones. Somedays I think, "Man, do I want to do this long term???" It's a lot with little ones running around and other responsibilities with house/cooking/etc.

How about calling the magnet school to see if you can have a tour, talk with the principal and ask your questions (how well do they screen all employees, parent involvement, etc). Maybe that would either ease your worries or make stronger your decision to homeschool.Do you have to send DD1 to preschool? You could always just keep her at home since she's too young for K and do a K-book with her at your choosing.
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Old 07-29-2012, 08:26 PM   #3
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Re: UGH! Thinking about switching to public/private school for awhile?!

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((((big hugs))))

I don't have words of advice, but I want you to know you are not alone. My oldest is the only one doing school (kindy... year round) and I have 3 younger ones. Somedays I think, "Man, do I want to do this long term???" It's a lot with little ones running around and other responsibilities with house/cooking/etc.

How about calling the magnet school to see if you can have a tour, talk with the principal and ask your questions (how well do they screen all employees, parent involvement, etc). Maybe that would either ease your worries or make stronger your decision to homeschool.Do you have to send DD1 to preschool? You could always just keep her at home since she's too young for K and do a K-book with her at your choosing.
I have thought about just sending DS. I actually already bought all of they're curriculum for this year, so this idea has been relatively new, as in the seriousness of it. I feel kind of pressured to decide because school here starts Aug.21st.
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Old 07-29-2012, 08:04 PM   #4
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Re: UGH! Thinking about switching to public/private school for awhile?!

I'm right there with you! I am so overwhelmed and stressed out that I've decided to send the girls to a private school. One of dds is excited and the other one hates the idea. I am feeling super guilty about it. So I know how you feel!
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Old 07-29-2012, 08:17 PM   #5
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Re: UGH! Thinking about switching to public/private school for awhile?!

Is there something specific that makes you think DS1 is missing something/falling behind? Also, I agree that with 4, your time is really divided, but do you think the amount of attention he's going to receive in a classroom of 20+ will be more or less than what he will receive with you?

Have you asked him what he thinks or how he feels about it? Personally, I wouldn't let an 8 yo make that kind of educational decision, but perhaps he has insight one way or the other that would help you in your/DH's decision.

I'm not trying to sway you one way or the other, but I just know that when I was preggo, every thing seemed like this insurmountable task when I thought about adding another baby to it. I'm chalking it up to hormones. In the end, I just kept putting one foot in front of the other and it was ok.
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Old 07-29-2012, 08:37 PM   #6
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Re: UGH! Thinking about switching to public/private school for awhile?!

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Is there something specific that makes you think DS1 is missing something/falling behind? Also, I agree that with 4, your time is really divided, but do you think the amount of attention he's going to receive in a classroom of 20+ will be more or less than what he will receive with you?

Have you asked him what he thinks or how he feels about it? Personally, I wouldn't let an 8 yo make that kind of educational decision, but perhaps he has insight one way or the other that would help you in your/DH's decision.

I'm not trying to sway you one way or the other, but I just know that when I was preggo, every thing seemed like this insurmountable task when I thought about adding another baby to it. I'm chalking it up to hormones. In the end, I just kept putting one foot in front of the other and it was ok.
DS is behind in math and phonics/spelling. I think its because of the one on one teaching time. I know that he won't get much one on one time but I think when the teacher teaches a lesson and students can ask questions is more of what I'm missing here.

And we have discussed going to a school before with him and he seems open to it. He has told me he wants sit down school time more.
I've asked DH if he would teach a course in the late afternoon and he seems open to it
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Old 07-30-2012, 12:32 AM   #7
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Re: UGH! Thinking about switching to public/private school for awhile?!

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Originally Posted by mommycass View Post
Sooo, I am an avid homeschooling mom. I love ALL things about it but I'm starting to feel like I'm failing my kids. DS is 8 1/2, DD1 is 4 1/2, DD2 is 19 months, and I'm expecting a LO in Feb.
DS is very smart and very studious. He reads chapter books, knows tons of science knowledge(that's been his favorite and hes learned a lot reading on his own). My older 2 are into soccer and basketball. We have a great homeschool support group. Many families at our church homeschool and we go on outings/field trips together.
But I feel like I'm not able to give the one on one teaching time that's needed. DD1 is very demanding of my time and attention as is DD2. And with #4 on the way its going to be worse. I think DS is failing to thrive curriculum wise because I don't have the time he needs. It worked great when DD1&2 napped I focused on school. Now with DD1 not napping its becoming more chaotic. I havent ever found a good balance between school and housekeeping. I feel like one takes away from the other. Our house seems to stay messy so I'm always cleaning, doing laundry, etc...
I've been considering putting DS and DD1 in a magnet school. It's a public school but has a focus on youth performing arts, along with sports and so on.
I have MANY worries that I'm sure any parent would have. But my biggest is that I don't want them to loose out on a Jesus based atmosphere. We don't have the $ to do private school. DD1 is very active and likes to be independent and constantly doing something. I don't want that to hurt her in a more confined atmosphere. DS is very laid back and loves to learn but he has tendencies to be a follower sometimes. I don't want him to change his drive to learn or start following wrong behavior.
I really like the idea of having extra time with my youngest and the newbie but dont want it to hurt the others. It makes me feel selfish
If I choose to go the magnet school route it would be to try it out. I'm really scared! I've hated seeing such little kids being sent off into the world. I have trust issues too.
I don't know if I should try it with DS first since he's older or DD1 too. She would go to all day preschool.
DH is supportive either way but I just don't know what to do
I had #4 this year with my oldest only 5 at the time. I ended up putting him in PS (we didn't have money for private school) b/c I was so overwhelmed - it was a month after school started b/c I really tried HS'ing but with #4 on the way it was too much. It turned out OK. He learned a lot, I felt guilt A LOT, he got in trouble some...but in the end I personally regret it. We are going to HS this year b/c I regretted it so much and felt like I did the wrong thing all year - I've made this decision with my parents, DH's parent's and seemingly everyone around me telling me he should be in PS. I just don't feel right about it. I'm terrified about not having the free time I did last year and I'm not sure how I'll deal - some days will probably be bad days. But, we sat down and talked about it today with him and he really wants to do HS this year and not go back to PS...he's been consistent about this throughout the summer. I think, I would have to feel really OK about putting him in PS to do it again...they will loose the 'Jesus' aspect too in a public school - even a mild mannered one - the teachers just can't talk about it or teach it - even if they want to. You can change your mind later in the year if it gets to hard, or you can change your mind next year if it gets to hard.

Know that you HAVE PERMISSION to put them in PS in you need to and want to and they'll adjust and do just fine...it'll be an adjustment though - they sit a lot in PS - even in K we found out. Do what you need to for your sanity though - and know that it's OK...I just wanted to share my experience since it sounded similar to yours !
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Old 07-30-2012, 05:59 AM   #8
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Re: UGH! Thinking about switching to public/private school for awhile?!

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I had #4 this year with my oldest only 5 at the time. I ended up putting him in PS (we didn't have money for private school) b/c I was so overwhelmed - it was a month after school started b/c I really tried HS'ing but with #4 on the way it was too much. It turned out OK. He learned a lot, I felt guilt A LOT, he got in trouble some...but in the end I personally regret it. We are going to HS this year b/c I regretted it so much and felt like I did the wrong thing all year - I've made this decision with my parents, DH's parent's and seemingly everyone around me telling me he should be in PS. I just don't feel right about it. I'm terrified about not having the free time I did last year and I'm not sure how I'll deal - some days will probably be bad days. But, we sat down and talked about it today with him and he really wants to do HS this year and not go back to PS...he's been consistent about this throughout the summer. I think, I would have to feel really OK about putting him in PS to do it again...they will loose the 'Jesus' aspect too in a public school - even a mild mannered one - the teachers just can't talk about it or teach it - even if they want to. You can change your mind later in the year if it gets to hard, or you can change your mind next year if it gets to hard.

Know that you HAVE PERMISSION to put them in PS in you need to and want to and they'll adjust and do just fine...it'll be an adjustment though - they sit a lot in PS - even in K we found out. Do what you need to for your sanity though - and know that it's OK...I just wanted to share my experience since it sounded similar to yours !
Thank you for sharing! I think this is how I would feel throughout the day to if the oldest or older ones were in school.
DH and I had a lengthy discussion last night about it and I'm going to stick to HSing. I just need to focus more on squeezing in the one on one time. I know it will be challenging some days but I think I will regret putting them in a school way to much. My mom and aunt keep trying to get me to try out a school for the kids. I think thats why I've been thinking about it a lot more. My mom thinks they need more socialization, which is silly because they play and hang out with other kids a lot. DH doesn't feel right about them sitting for many hours through the day. We've talked about a co-op or just a class DS can take outside the house. I have some things to look into but I think staying on the HS route is best.

Keep us in your prayers and I'll keep all you mamas in mine
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Old 07-30-2012, 06:40 AM   #9
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You might want to try combining classes like social studies and science for your kids to make your life easier. As long as you keep reinforcing the phonics you'll be fine. Sometimes it takes kids until 7-10 to fully grasp the concept of reading. Keep reading to your kids a lot because that will help. Point out phonics in everyday life to get in an extra lesson.
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Old 07-30-2012, 07:06 AM   #10
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Re: UGH! Thinking about switching to public/private school for awhile?!

How about an "online" curriculum? Something that would require less of your one on one time because someone/something else is doing the work? Even if you found some place where you only did one subject "online", you wouldn't have to prepare the lesson.
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