Diaper Swappers

newmommy13 · 09-13-2012, 10:21 AM

dd has a new physical therapist at school that is a man. i've never met him, have heard nothing bad about him, but it makes me a little sick to think that this is the first time in Amelia's life that she could get hurt. She's never been alone with a male before and a select few women such as her other therapists at school. They take her to and from the therapy room when they take her out of the classroom for therapy. I know logically that a woman can molest a child too, but statistics show that men are much more likely to be offenders so without even being given a chance i have assumed the worst about this person.

i've never had a talk with dd on this topic, i have never felt like it was a real possibility for her to get hurt up until now. i don't want her to be afraid of everyone or get confused about what is appropriate and inappropriate touching. i don't want her to come home from school and say that her therapist was touching her in a bad way when really it was just something she didn't want to do like uncomfortable stretches. i think this is a possibility for her, she's not manipulative but she is very naive and highly suggestible if that is a word. does that make sense?

HeatherlovesCDs · 09-13-2012, 10:30 AM

My first thought is...my husband is a PT and he wouldn't do that. I would feel badly if you were assuming it about him. HOWEVER, I have a past and my mind goes to the same thing very quickly. So, I'm not offended and I totally get it.

Secondly, are you sure he is alone with her? I know that is something my husband wouldn't do, even with an adult female. At the very least, he leaves the door cracked. I'd ask so you know and I'd also ask if the door is left open to the room or if it can be. Those things should help ease your mind.

And, I'd probably have a talk with your dd about appropriate touching and telling you immediately if anything feels uncomfortable. I would NOT give her any ideas about this man specifically. But, she should be aware of this regardless of this situation because it really can happen anywhere at anytime. Then, I would ask her how her therapy went everyday she has it. I wouldn't ask anything that will put ideas into her head. I'd just ask how it went and what they did, if they did anything different and maybe if it hurt (because sometimes therapy can and it goes without saying that other things can too).

I'm sorry you are worried. Even though my husband is a PT, I completely understand your fears.

Gothmommy · 09-13-2012, 10:32 AM

My DS has difficulty understanding other people's motives, so I was incredibly nervous the first few times he was alone with other adults, male or female. I taught him that touching anywhere that underwear covers is something he should tell mne about.

This message won't self destruct in 30 seconds.

qsefthuko · 09-13-2012, 10:41 AM

I would first make sure someone is in the room with the therapist. This would not only protect your daughter but also the therapist from false acusations. I make sure to tell my children what good touch is and what bad touch is. I am very specific as well so the children do not make mistakes. I also inforce the idea there is NO REASON a teacher or other adult at school should be completely alone with the children. In other words no other child or adult is present. I also make sure to let my kids know not all abuse comes from adults. If another child is behaving inappropriatly towards them it is also wrong. Ignorance on the childs part can lead to problems. Knowledge can empower the child. If they know without a doubt certain behaviour towards them is not right they can react better.

KaleidoscopeEyes · 09-13-2012, 10:43 AM

im surprised a school would have a PT not have someone else in the room. us makes sense to protect the client and the PT

luvsviola · 09-13-2012, 12:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KaleidoscopeEyes

im surprised a school would have a PT not have someone else in the room. us makes sense to protect the client and the PT

That sounds good. But in a time where we barely have enough money to keep paras to keep the special education ratios legal, there are not extra adults just laying around. Our district has fired the librarians, most of the secretaries, most of the paras, and is bare bones. No field trips, no new books for the library, no new textbooks, nothing! There is not someone to just sit with the PT all day.

We have many service providers in our building--OT, PT, ST, psychologist, and 2 behvioral therapists who are outsourced and paid for by Medicaid/private insurance. There is no way that we could supervise all of them.

The school district hired a professional. He is treated the same as any other employee by the district. It is unreasonable to expect he be supervised by another adult. If you are uncomfortable with it, request that you be present during all therapy. You are permitted to come to the school and supervise any time you wish.

Or, get a script from your doctor and go to private pay therapy. DS does PT at school, but also sees a private therapist once a week. Medicaid pays for it.

JeDeeLenae · 09-13-2012, 12:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by luvsviola

That sounds good. But in a time where we barely have enough money to keep paras to keep the special education ratios legal, there are not extra adults just laying around. Our district has fired the librarians, most of the secretaries, most of the paras, and is bare bones. No field trips, no new books for the library, no new textbooks, nothing! There is not someone to just sit with the PT all day.

We have many service providers in our building--OT, PT, ST, psychologist, and 2 behvioral therapists who are outsourced and paid for by Medicaid/private insurance. There is no way that we could supervise all of them.

The school district hired a professional. He is treated the same as any other employee by the district. It is unreasonable to expect he be supervised by another adult. If you are uncomfortable with it, request that you be present during all therapy. You are permitted to come to the school and supervise any time you wish.

Or, get a script from your doctor and go to private pay therapy. DS does PT at school, but also sees a private therapist once a week. Medicaid pays for it.

More schools should hook up with local colleges. Lots of students that could use an internship.

Sent from my iPhone using DS Forum

luvsviola · 09-13-2012, 01:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JeDeeLenae

More schools should hook up with local colleges. Lots of students that could use an internship.

We have a partnership with University of Indianapolis here, but it is hard to fit in the college students schedules, and many of them don't have cars, so getting out to our building is tough. They are here 2 hours a week, but our district's requirement is that they come with a professor as a group so they are supervised while interacting with our students, and the teachers here don't have to worry about supervising them.

Terra · 09-13-2012, 04:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by luvsviola

That sounds good. But in a time where we barely have enough money to keep paras to keep the special education ratios legal, there are not extra adults just laying around. Our district has fired the librarians, most of the secretaries, most of the paras, and is bare bones. No field trips, no new books for the library, no new textbooks, nothing! There is not someone to just sit with the PT all day.

We have many service providers in our building--OT, PT, ST, psychologist, and 2 behvioral therapists who are outsourced and paid for by Medicaid/private insurance. There is no way that we could supervise all of them.

The school district hired a professional. He is treated the same as any other employee by the district. It is unreasonable to expect he be supervised by another adult. If you are uncomfortable with it, request that you be present during all therapy. You are permitted to come to the school and supervise any time you wish.

Or, get a script from your doctor and go to private pay therapy. DS does PT at school, but also sees a private therapist once a week. Medicaid pays for it.

That is the truth! Our school was scrambling today when a teacher left because of a sick child and I was pulled from doing Discovery testing to teach the class.

OP! It IS a scary though to think that our little ones would ever be hurt like that. I agree about having the talk and periodically reminding her and saying never be scared to tell. That said, I do agree too that is much much less likely to happen in that setting than a family friend/relative. I was molested as a kindergartener by a family friend who was babysitting. Never ever once at school in all my years did I ever have a teacher even act inappropriately in anyway with me in their presence or towards me.

Our school's OT is 'alone', but he pulls 2 kiddos at a time and he does it in teacher mail/copier/lounge so people are always in and out.

JeDeeLenae · 09-13-2012, 10:44 AM

I would definitely suggest a 3rd party in the room. This protects everyone. Then good touch/bad touch talk.

09-13-2012, 10:21 AM	#1
newmommy13 Registered Users Join Date: Apr 2008 Posts: 7,548 Ratings: 104 Feedback: 100%	how do you protect your kids from molestation? dd has a new physical therapist at school that is a man. i've never met him, have heard nothing bad about him, but it makes me a little sick to think that this is the first time in Amelia's life that she could get hurt. She's never been alone with a male before and a select few women such as her other therapists at school. They take her to and from the therapy room when they take her out of the classroom for therapy. I know logically that a woman can molest a child too, but statistics show that men are much more likely to be offenders so without even being given a chance i have assumed the worst about this person. i've never had a talk with dd on this topic, i have never felt like it was a real possibility for her to get hurt up until now. i don't want her to be afraid of everyone or get confused about what is appropriate and inappropriate touching. i don't want her to come home from school and say that her therapist was touching her in a bad way when really it was just something she didn't want to do like uncomfortable stretches. i think this is a possibility for her, she's not manipulative but she is very naive and highly suggestible if that is a word. does that make sense? __________________ I, mama to dd A (3-08) and dfs J (10/11) hopeful pre-adoptive foster family

09-13-2012, 10:30 AM	#2
HeatherlovesCDs Registered Users Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 8,823 Ratings: 98 Feedback: 100% My Mood:	Re: how do you protect your kids from molestation? My first thought is...my husband is a PT and he wouldn't do that. I would feel badly if you were assuming it about him. HOWEVER, I have a past and my mind goes to the same thing very quickly. So, I'm not offended and I totally get it. Secondly, are you sure he is alone with her? I know that is something my husband wouldn't do, even with an adult female. At the very least, he leaves the door cracked. I'd ask so you know and I'd also ask if the door is left open to the room or if it can be. Those things should help ease your mind. And, I'd probably have a talk with your dd about appropriate touching and telling you immediately if anything feels uncomfortable. I would NOT give her any ideas about this man specifically. But, she should be aware of this regardless of this situation because it really can happen anywhere at anytime. Then, I would ask her how her therapy went everyday she has it. I wouldn't ask anything that will put ideas into her head. I'd just ask how it went and what they did, if they did anything different and maybe if it hurt (because sometimes therapy can and it goes without saying that other things can too). I'm sorry you are worried. Even though my husband is a PT, I completely understand your fears. __________________ Heather SAHM to 6 who are 7 and under, including 2 sets of twins and our last little miracle, a surviving identical twin, born Oct 2012! Last edited by HeatherlovesCDs; 09-13-2012 at 11:19 AM.

09-13-2012, 10:32 AM	#3
Gothmommy Registered Users Join Date: Aug 2010 Location: NorthEast Pennsylvania Posts: 471 Ratings: 6 Feedback: 100% My Mood:	My DS has difficulty understanding other people's motives, so I was incredibly nervous the first few times he was alone with other adults, male or female. I taught him that touching anywhere that underwear covers is something he should tell mne about. This message won't self destruct in 30 seconds. __________________ Aimee, Mama to Seth, 7 and Seras, 2 Earning Money on ICS and on PaidViewpoints! Bloggin' it up on Dirt-Cheap Mama

09-13-2012, 10:41 AM	#4
qsefthuko Registered Users Join Date: May 2011 Posts: 6,351 Ratings: 67 Feedback: 100%	Re: how do you protect your kids from molestation? I would first make sure someone is in the room with the therapist. This would not only protect your daughter but also the therapist from false acusations. I make sure to tell my children what good touch is and what bad touch is. I am very specific as well so the children do not make mistakes. I also inforce the idea there is NO REASON a teacher or other adult at school should be completely alone with the children. In other words no other child or adult is present. I also make sure to let my kids know not all abuse comes from adults. If another child is behaving inappropriatly towards them it is also wrong. Ignorance on the childs part can lead to problems. Knowledge can empower the child. If they know without a doubt certain behaviour towards them is not right they can react better.

09-13-2012, 10:43 AM	#5
KaleidoscopeEyes Registered Users Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Springfield Missouri Posts: 12,228 Ratings: 66 Feedback: 100% My Mood:	Re: how do you protect your kids from molestation? im surprised a school would have a PT not have someone else in the room. us makes sense to protect the client and the PT __________________ Super crunchy, atheist, vegetarian, liberal WOH and student mama to 4 wonderful, smart homeschooling kids Wesley 14, Seth 7, Pandora Moonlilly 3 and Nevermore Stargazer (11/2012) and married to the love of my life and SAH DH.