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Old 09-19-2012, 09:17 PM   #1
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3yr old says teacher spanks

This might get long winded...

This morning Emma (3) had to go potty as soon as we got to school (all day pre-school, private). While she was on the potty she somehow managed to pee on her shorts....so I said, no problem, we have extra clothes in your backpack, we need to change your shorts.

She then says "Ms. S spanks the little boy when he goes potty". I asked her to repeat what she said and she again said her teacher spanks the boy when he goes potty. I asked if she really said spank and she said yes. I asked if it was in the classroom and she said yes and then started singing a song....converstaion over.

This afternoon I asked her to show me what she meant by "spank" and she slapped her leg with her hand. I asked where the little boy was spanked...I said "on his hiney, or his leg, or..." and first she said leg and then she giggled and said no, his hiney.

I know the class has some issues with going potty - they are 3 yr olds and the school requires that they be potty trained (in the handbook)...they are a pre-school not a day care so they are not set up to be changing diapers. I know that there is one boy (from convos with the teacher) that is NOT potty trained and always has accidents..and several other kids that are not fully potty trained. The school sent a note home that all kids needed to be potty trained by Oct 1 or they would need to be withdrawn...again, the rules/handbook clearly says they needed to be potty trained to be in the class...that's why Emma is almost 4 (in the 3 yr old class) because she was not potty trained last year.

I totally believe Emma...she was just in that "zone"...it's like she saw her "spare clothes" and had this moment where things were "clicking" and she put 2 and 2 together and just matter of fact told me what she did. I don't think she was cared , per say, she just had this thought that...potty accident and spanking...and she just said it.

I am going to talk to the director tomorrow morning (she was in a meeting this afternoon). I know I want to tell her that I do not want them pulling Emma out of class to speak to her. I want to say either I bring her in in the morning and I am with her or (preferrably) they don't ask her anything. I don't want Emma feeling like she said something wrong. I don't know if it would be appropriate for me to ask what their procedure is and for me to have the "results". I don't want to continue in the class wondering if they ever even investigated it. If they do some training or something I want to know that it was done. Would it be appropriate to ask that?? I know the handbooks says they do not condone spanking or use it for discipline. Anything else I should ask? Should I ask for it to be documented, and ask for proof?? Should I ask that the other parent (of the little boy) be notified? I just don't want to seem like I am over-reacting but I don't think it should just be swept under the rug. I don't want Emma thinking that potty accidents deserve a spanking.
Thanks
L
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Old 09-19-2012, 09:21 PM   #2
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Re: 3yr old says teacher spanks

I would ask about it and def. tell them not to say ANYTHING to your dd about it. She needs to be able to speak freely to you about anything without fear.
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Old 09-19-2012, 09:22 PM   #3
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Re: 3yr old says teacher spanks

I would definitely talk to the director and just be very factual about what your daughter said, and then let the director take it from there.

Good luck mama!
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Old 09-20-2012, 08:42 AM   #4
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Re: 3yr old says teacher spanks

Talked to the director....she seemed really shocked and kinda like I just ruined her day oops. She said they wouldn't talk to Emma without asking me first - but really she didn't need to talk to her. I told her the kids name and she was going to take it from there. I felt like such a tattle tale.
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Old 09-20-2012, 09:31 AM   #5
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Re: 3yr old says teacher spanks

Dont feel like a tattle tale, if it were my son who was the one getting hit, I would want to know and be grateful that someone else found out and brought it to light... that is, after I had the teacher's job and went ape s**t on her. Are you 100% sure your DD isnt getting hit as well??

omg i would be so livid
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Old 09-20-2012, 09:56 AM   #6
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As a childcare provider/ Teacher this makes mr livid as heck and breaks my heart go above the director and contact the state in charge of making the rules report this women ASAP. Also contact cps so the can open an investigation.
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Old 09-20-2012, 09:59 AM   #7
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Re: 3yr old says teacher spanks

I would be really upset and you did the right thing by talking to the director about it. They should not be spanking people children, especially for potty accidents!
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Old 09-20-2012, 05:05 PM   #8
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Re: 3yr old says teacher spanks

You so did the right thing. That teacher sucks. You don't hit a kid for a potty accident. I may be sensitive to this due to a family situation that ended horribly wrong because a child soiled himself.
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Old 09-20-2012, 11:45 PM   #9
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You definately did the right thing. I would be livid if I found out a teacher spanked my child. That poor little boy. Who the heck does that teacher think she is? I don't know if I could continue to allow my child to be in a class with that teacher.

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Old 09-21-2012, 12:07 AM   #10
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Re: 3yr old says teacher spanks

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Originally Posted by Mom2Connor View Post
I would be really upset and you did the right thing by talking to the director about it. They should not be spanking people children, especially for potty accidents!
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