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Old 10-12-2012, 06:40 PM   #1
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RELATED sad UPDATE: It's attitudes like this that continue to perpetuate ignorance.

ETA: So for the last few days Aaron has been really down when it comes to Halloween and whenever any asks what he wants to be for Halloween he gets sad and says "I don't know."
And he would never tell me why.

This morning DH asked when I was going to buy their costumes and Aaron got really sad again and said "Mommy I don't know what I want to be yet."
So I said, "I thought you wanted to be Tinkerbell." To which he replied. "Tinkerbell is for girls." And he was so sad.
I asked who told him that and he said Miss Lula who is one of his teachers from his Pre-school kindergarten readiness class.

I have to be honest and say that I am quite sad and upset. I kind of "get" feeling that way. But I don't get telling and imposing on others one's own personal morals. Now I have a son who is sad and the joy of Halloween is gone and he doesn't really want to be anything now.

And my DH are at such odds over this and he leans more to gender specific things.
Ugghh, just venting.


The teacher that I work with is such a nice lady and we have quite a bit in common. She's a believer like me, but more conservative however she is open-minded as well.

Anyway, she was telling me about her pastor and the message he gave last Sunday. She said he was talking about homosexuality of course [from their point how it's wrong], no biggie there, everyone has a right to believe what they want.
But she said he went on to say "And that's why we must raise our boys to be men and our girls to be women. Boys should only play with cars, trucks, play sports. And girls should play with dolls, barbies, and help do housework.

I'm in shock. I know I shouldn't be. I just am floored that the latter attitude is still alive and that people still think that what a little boy or little girl plays with or does will make them gay. Even if you don't believe someone is born gay, IMO [and I realize that this in controversial], playing with certain toys or being involved in activities like sports or even Home Economics, will NOT make one gay.

I really just don't get that. I don't at all. Especially since my youngest [4 years old] is very drawn to girly/feminine things. But he has no idea about sexuality at this age. It is truly a child's play and imagination.

How sad that with such attitudes we [general we], are the ones that begin attaching stigmas to things that reach our children, thus raising children with those attitudes.

Again, whether one believes in the *born that way* or *choice* is not the issue in this. Being a child and being at play in "only certain ways" is what is so sad and frustrating to me

Every day I feel myself more and more and more turned off by "Christianity". I'm a sold out believer in Christ Jesus. However, between this election year and these kinds of attitudes I just find myself never ever wanting to set foot in a brick and mortar church again.
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Last edited by Terra; 10-14-2012 at 08:04 AM.
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Old 10-12-2012, 07:06 PM   #2
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Re: It's attitudes like this that continue to perpetuate ignorance.

The wonderful thing about America, is that she is entitled to her beliefs, and you to yours. However, this seems like a pretty unprofessional thing for her to bring up at work.
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Old 10-12-2012, 07:23 PM   #3
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Re: It's attitudes like this that continue to perpetuate ignorance.

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The wonderful thing about America, is that she is entitled to her beliefs, and you to yours. However, this seems like a pretty unprofessional thing for her to bring up at work.
So true, glad we all have that freedom!
I meant to add that she was actually turned off by it too. She told me she wondered how many people he offended. She's super nice and we share amongst each other some spiritual things since we have some of the same beliefs. She likes a lot of the people there but some of belief system she is not so much liking.
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Old 10-12-2012, 08:15 PM   #4
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Originally Posted by luvsviola
The wonderful thing about America, is that she is entitled to her beliefs, and you to yours. However, this seems like a pretty unprofessional thing for her to bring up at work.
See, I don't buy that we are all entitled to believe hateful things. It is akin to someone saying black people are inferior, and someone excusing it because that's their belief and they are entitled to it. Homophobia is hate under the guise of a religious excuse, and it is wrong, therefore should not be tolerated.

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Originally Posted by songbird516
And that's why people who are teaching a group, supposedly from the Bible, shouldn't give their own viewpoint, but stick to what the Bible actually says. Yes the Bible says that homosexuality is wrong, but there's nothing in there that says that raising your boys in any particular way will change them. It's almost as bad as Ezzo claiming that he knows how to raise kids "god's way".
The bible says many things are wrong, yet people pick and choose what they want to actually live by. I think using the bible as an excuse for why homosexuality is wrong is every bit as abhorrent as when it was used to back up the "wrongness" of interracial marriage.
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Old 10-12-2012, 08:21 PM   #5
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See, I don't buy that we are all entitled to believe hateful things. It is akin to someone saying black people are inferior, and someone excusing it because that's their belief and they are entitled to it. Homophobia is hate under the guise of a religious excuse, and it is wrong, therefore should not be tolerated.



The bible says many things are wrong, yet people pick and choose what they want to actually live by. I think using the bible as an excuse for why homosexuality is wrong is every bit as abhorrent as when it was used to back up the "wrongness" of interracial marriage.
Good points. Personally, as a believer, it's frustrating that Old Testament verses are cherry picked, yet people who use it don't follow all of the "Old Law". I get really believing that something isn't right. It's the hate, the judging, etc that bothers me so much.
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Old 10-13-2012, 05:26 AM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by soonerfan
See, I don't buy that we are all entitled to believe hateful things. It is akin to someone saying black people are inferior, and someone excusing it because that's their belief and they are entitled to it. Homophobia is hate under the guise of a religious excuse, and it is wrong, therefore should not be tolerated.

The bible says many things are wrong, yet people pick and choose what they want to actually live by. I think using the bible as an excuse for why homosexuality is wrong is every bit as abhorrent as when it was used to back up the "wrongness" of interracial marriage.
Thank you! I agree entirely. I believe the only common theme through every book in the bible is to love one another as Jesus loved. Judging others based on race or sexual preference is not love. Having a preacher allude to this kind of prejudice is abhorrent and something I would have brought up to my church counsel. But then, I attend a church that welcomes and loves all people.

As for raising our children as men and women, I don't understand the concept. I'm raising my kids to be respectful, responsible adults. How they identify as a gender is their choice!

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Old 10-12-2012, 07:13 PM   #7
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My SIL had the same feeling you do towards christianity. She believes, but is turned off by the actions of those around her.

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Old 10-12-2012, 07:18 PM   #8
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Re: It's attitudes like this that continue to perpetuate ignorance.

Some of it is such a deeply ingrained thing it's hard to let go of. I mean, I don't believe that what I child plays with has anything to do with their sexuality, but I still find myself stopping -- or wanting to stop -- my son from doing something "girly". Stuff that when I really think about it, I don't have a problem with, but because it is so much in society that boys play with "boy toys" I sometimes don't realize what I'm doing.
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Old 10-12-2012, 07:18 PM   #9
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Re: It's attitudes like this that continue to perpetuate ignorance.

My FIL just had a cow because my 4 y/o son was wearing make-up.
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Old 10-12-2012, 07:24 PM   #10
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Re: It's attitudes like this that continue to perpetuate ignorance.

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My FIL just had a cow because my 4 y/o son was wearing make-up.
Aaron totally loves some lip gloss!!!
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