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Old 03-10-2013, 08:46 AM   #1
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34 week Preemie mama needs help

My DS2 is 36 hours old. He was born at 34 weeks because I started losing too much blood from placenta previa. He had steroid shots at 31 weeks.

He looked really good after birth, but is getting worse and worse. Started with cpap and air, then 30% oxygen and now 45%. They think he might have caught an infection in his lungs.

I am struggling because I feel so helpless. I am unable to pump more than 4 drops of colostrum each session. Plus they just took him off feedings (iv only). I am just now able to get up and walk and go see him, and I feel out of the loop. He had 2 xrays that I just found out about. He is starting another round of antibiotics. And they are considering draining his lungs. All this while I was in bed.

They dont like when we touch him, we cant hold him. They dont even like when we talk to him. I am his mother and i cant do anything.

Is it normal to feel this way? I had bad ppd with ds1. I am wondering if I shouldnt talk yo my ob?
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Old 03-10-2013, 09:07 AM   #2
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Re: 34 week Preemie mama needs help

First, hugs to you, it's really hard to have a baby in NICU.

It's normal for them to keep you away, I cried one time when I called down to NICU to go see him and the nurse told me I couldn't come because his heart rate was high. It's awful.

I was only allowed to hold him while he was feeding, once he was on tube feeds.

It's normal to only gets drops of colostrum, I never got more than that, and my supply came in great. Just keep pumping, it'll come in soon.

They may let you do some kangaroo care once he gets healthier, I know my hospital supported it. Talk with the nurses, they know what goes on and can help you understand what to expect as far as policies and procedures. See if you can set up a time to meet with his caregiver, which should be a neonatologist. Knowing who his doctor is and talking with him can help a lot.
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Old 03-10-2013, 09:17 AM   #3
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Mama I know how ya feel my lol one was born at 30 weeks. I didn't see her for 5 days. I didn't hold her til she was in the nicu for a month & that was just good timing I came in while they were weighing her & I just stole her. It's super hard but they do it for the baby's safety. At one point I had to be all dressed up in drs gear before I could even stick my finger in the incubator for her to hold. They just don't want no germs in there making the already sensitive baby worse. As your baby starts doing better then it will get better. As for pumping I have no good advice my milk never came in. I know you don't want to hear but I'd go ahead & discuss meds to help it. I took everything made & never got milk in. It killed me I got just enough to make her through her first month in nicu. It's hard all around mama but their is light at the end of the tunnel.
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Old 03-10-2013, 10:59 AM   #4
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My DS2 was born in December at 35 weeks and 0 days. He did great in the OR and they took him to NICU for CPAP just in case. To make a long story short, he ended up intubated for 3 days. It was awful, especially since he started out so good. We did only end up staying a total of 9 days so he did well after they figured out his lung issues. He had 2 doses of Surfactant. He was born on a Sunday and I didn't get to hold him until Thursday. I also started with just drops of colostrum but my milk came in after a few days. He is EBF now and over 13lbs at 3 months. Many, many hugs mama. The NICU ride is never easy with lots of ups and downs. At his gestation, he hopefully won't be there long.
I'm so tired of hearing about how important a birth is. It is absolutely nothing more than an obstacle between a family and a baby.
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Old 03-11-2013, 06:39 PM   #5
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Re: 34 week Preemie mama needs help

Unfortunately, this all sounds familiar to me. Does he have signs of distress when you talk to him or touch him? If not, I would continue to do those things.
Christian WOHMama to DD1 7/07 and twins DD2 and DS 11/11
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Old 05-27-2013, 10:05 AM   #6
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Re: 34 week Preemie mama needs help

Originally Posted by CASMama711 View Post
Does he have signs of distress when you talk to him or touch him? If not, I would continue to do those things.
I agree. just do it. a baby needs love and warmth and to hear your heartbeat or voice to thrive. so many studies prove this. I would do it!! I had a 35.5 weeker and wore him constantly. no hospital needed. he was slow to grow and very sleepy the 1st 2 weeks but grew fast after
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Old 03-12-2013, 01:53 AM   #7
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Thank you for your stories and support. It really has helped to come back and read them Nd know i am not the only one!

My baby is doing better but it looks like this is going to be a longer stay than I imagined. He is finally eating (and its all my milk finally!) And we can touch and talk to him. Those were happy moments

Thanks again ladies. DS has been a wonderful for my sanity these past few days.
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Old 03-13-2013, 08:04 PM   #8
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Re: 34 week Preemie mama needs help

May avi pic is my 34 weeker at 3 weeks old. The pumping after my surgery was slow to start too but it picked up by around day 5. So glad to hear that things are getting better. If I could go back and tell myself one thing I would say to take some time to rest and heal myself. I was down at the NICU for almost every feed and by the end of his stay (8 days), I was wiped out.

If you are on facebook there is a site called peek a boo icu that might help you out as you go through this part of your journey.

Congratulations on your new itty bitty!
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My IVF Miracle Marchkin born January 2012
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Old 03-18-2013, 08:47 AM   #9
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Hugs, mama! I had my fourth 32 weeker January 23. He started out great compared to my others who were intubated within hours of birth. I was Able to do kangaroo care twice on his second day, Then at two days old collapsed a lung and was intubated and had a chest tube placed. During this time they encouraged us to talk to him and gently touch him. Thankfully he was only intubated for a couple days and then was off everything. Babies can be resilient and turn around quick once they figure out what they're supposed to be doing!
*~*Amanda- US Navy wife to David, mommy to Kaiden (2/1/05), Kyndal (7/18/07), Identical Twins Rowan and Ryder (8/20/09), surrogate mother to Maddie (3/8/2011) and our newest rainbow, Everett (1/23/13)
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Old 03-18-2013, 10:11 PM   #10
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Re: 34 week Preemie mama needs help

Hey mama, NICU time is so rough. Our 29 weeker was there for 72 days. Your feelings are very normal.

Ask to help with his diaper changes and taking his temps and all that kind of stuff they do. They always encouraged us to help out with these things, and it was nice to be able to do something for our little girl. You may not be able to hold or even touch him if he is too fragile, but he does need to be touched for these things so itd be a way to get a little hands on care while not stressing him beyond what is necessary.

If he is strong enough to be touched (honestly they always let us touch our girl no matter how sick she was) wash and then purrell your hands, then wait for the purell to dry so you aren't overwhelming him with fumes. Then just lay your warm hands on him. We usually would put one hand over her belly and one on the top of her head. Preemies are very sensitive to touch and often don't like to be stroked, but this can be comforting. And talking in soft, soothing tones is very good for them as well. He will recognize your voice and find comfort in it. Also, take some of the blankets they will put in his isolette and roll them up and stick them in your shirt for a while. They'll get your scent and that is comforting as well. This was something they asked us to do at our NICU.

Kangaroo care is also very good for baby, if he is strong enough.

And you should be able to call at any hour to know whats going on, even if you can't be there.

And keep pumping even if you're not getting much and he can't eat. That way you keep up your supply for later.

I know this post is a little old and you may already know many of these things now. But just passing it all along in case. Feel free to message me with any questions, I'll help you out all I can as a mama of a NICU graduate!!
I'm Angela- a vegetarian, CD'g, on time vax'g, stay at home mama to our 29 week miracle girl Alessandra 4/24/12! Always missing our angel baby Aubrey 11/'10. Married to my love Matt.
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