Reply Hey Mom! Learn more about the Gerber Life Insurance Grow-Up Plan!
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 06-19-2007, 02:18 PM   #1
GrahamBaby4
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Colorado
Posts: 799
My Mood:
Serious Problems with my 7yr old

Okay, First let me give you a bit of information on him.
he is rather Large (almost 5ft tall and 83lbs) He will be 8 the end of July. He just finished the 2nd grade where I had him tested for special ed because he would refuse to do any sort of writing or anything else he didn't feel like doing and would cry instead of getting things done. So, they tested him at the school with a psychologist/psychatrist from the district... he told me I was in BIG trouble, the child, even though he refused to do the portion of the test that requires him to pick up a darned writing utinsel he scored near genius and above on all the tests. He says, "he's just stubborn and thinks he isn't as smart as the rest of the class because he doesn't think the way they do" So, we get through the year. He is of course reading on 4th-5th grade level and failing miserably in writing, which is something that no matter what the punishment or reward is, its not getting done, because it isn't important to him.

So fast forward to today. He almost kills his 3 yr old brother over a lego smaller than 1cm, and shows no remorse, thinks its okay that he was going to hurt him this badly over this specific toy. and then... about 5 minutes later his other brother 5 yrs old is crying and screaming at him, so I call them both up from the toy room and send older ds to his room, because he shows no signs of having a clue what he has done, and I ask the younger one, why were you screaming? and he says... D says when he grows up he's going to kill everyone So I call DH freaking out because first this is the 7th time this summer that I have had to cancel any kind of fun activity we were going to do because of this child's behavior and the fact that he SAID that and shows every sign of being serious and doesn't seem to have the social knowledge that he is WAY OFF!!! So, I am trying to figure out what is wrong with this child, He doesn't have any social skills, his IQ is incredibly high and emotionally he knows how to maniplate everyone around him. I am at a total loss with him. I can't even go to the grocery store with the 3 of them because of this one!!! its not the fact there are 3 of them, last year I took 6 to the store with no problems. He cannot behave for longer than 20 seconds, and that is MAX of twenty seconds!! His teacher was pulling her hair out and I'd go in and cry with her because we couldn't figure him out. I am an intelligent person, but I am at a total loss with this child. My DH says we might have to send him to a mental hospital to have them evaluate him because we can only do so much!!


ADDING this info.... He also takes NO responsibility for his own actions, it is always someone elses fault, never his.
__________________
Michelle WAHM to
Dalton 7/99, Hayden 3/02, Tyler 9/03, Kaitlin 10/07
www.workathomeunited.com/askmehow

Last edited by GrahamBaby4; 06-19-2007 at 02:19 PM. Reason: forgot to add
GrahamBaby4 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-19-2007, 02:21 PM   #2
jls~Kain~Drake's Avatar
jls~Kain~Drake
Registered Users
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Virginia
Posts: 4,573
My Mood:
Re: Serious Problems with my 7yr old

I don't have any idea, but
__________________
Jenelle SAHM to Kain (01/27/04) Drake (08/22/05)
~*55 lbs lost, 25 to go!*~
jls~Kain~Drake is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-20-2007, 03:57 PM   #3
eirbjorn's Avatar
eirbjorn
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Beaverton, OR
Posts: 1,002
My Mood:
Re: Serious Problems with my 7yr old

So sorry mama!

My DS (also big for his age and scored above 99th percentile for IQ when school district tested him) is also the same with writing ~ although I prefer to homeschool, I don't even think it is an option with him. We tried it last year for a month in 2nd grade and he refused to write. He would cry and yell at the teacher telling her he doesn't have to do things perfectly and only her way. Much easier for me and him at home.... BUT, I do not have all of the behavioral problems you have... there is the lack of social ability, and extreme stubborness though, but not the lack of remorse, that is very frightening.
I was diagnosed with Asperger's as an adult, so I worry some with DS, but the ped (who I need a referral from) says if it doesn't effect his work at school, then we don't need to worry about it ~ and since I homeschool.... naturally, I think the better I know what I'm dealing with the better I can help my son... but we will get a new ped soon.
I would definitely get a professional to evaluate him, and get him some therapy, as that is very scary stuff. I am so sorry you're having to go through that!

Gifted children can have more difficulties than children with learning difficulties, and are much more prone to things like suicide and depression. I believe it is not too early to try to prevent as many as these problems as possible - but I am still learning how to deal with my DS as well, so don't have any advice on what to do. Good luck, mama!
__________________
Homeschooling Mama to Julian (11/12/98) , Sheherazade (11/13/00) , Evander (07/26/07) and Finn (07/18/09)
Wife to my best friend and soul mate (08/17/04)

Last edited by eirbjorn; 06-20-2007 at 04:03 PM.
eirbjorn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-20-2007, 04:59 PM   #4
mamandeyuri
Registered Users
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 196
My Mood:
Re: Serious Problems with my 7yr old

First let me give you plenty of ((hugs))...as a teacher I have dealt with the student in middle school and its not pretty. We try to get student counseling but if there is no intervention things can go really wrong. I.e. One student threatened to kill another on my space,charges were filed... or the one that threatened to stab me and my baby.. (I was pregnant)- now mind you I try to find the way that everyone learns and use various teaching methods.
I know as a parent that has to be frustrating.
My own son does not like to write, but reads on a 4th grade level- he's just finished 1st grade.
Please, please get him some counseling. In elementary schools its hard to get it, but in middle and high school children see counselors/therapists all the time. They have group sessions and individual sessions.
mamandeyuri is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-19-2007, 02:23 PM   #5
ferrferr
Banned
seller
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Catsquirrels
Posts: 4,249
My Mood:
Re: Serious Problems with my 7yr old

Woah. mama....

I'd get him in to see a therapist ASAP. Aggression like that is NOT okay at any age, and the fact that he verbalized killing people when he gets older would be like getting hit by a big red truck. There is WAY more going on in his head that needs to be straighted out.
ferrferr is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-19-2007, 02:38 PM   #6
haynmama's Avatar
haynmama
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Hawaii
Posts: 3,495
My Mood:
Re: Serious Problems with my 7yr old

Quote:
Originally Posted by ferrferr View Post
Woah. mama....

I'd get him in to see a therapist ASAP. Aggression like that is NOT okay at any age, and the fact that he verbalized killing people when he gets older would be like getting hit by a big red truck. There is WAY more going on in his head that needs to be straighted out.
I agree, and have no advice but a lot of: My cousin recently adpoted her DH's grandkids and one of them is very aggressive and takes pride and joy in hurting others. She takes him to a therapist once a week and says it's helped tremendously. He was diagnosed w/ADHD, but she is trying to not go the med-route.
__________________
*~Loving Wife and SAHM to Emily 6/98, Kaimana 2/01, and Lehiwa 3/07~*

haynmama is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-19-2007, 02:44 PM   #7
travelinmom's Avatar
travelinmom
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Oregon
Posts: 2,474
My Mood:
Re: Serious Problems with my 7yr old

I agree he needs to see a professional, it's not normal behavior for any age. Take him in
__________________
Elaina-nomadic mother of three, Sapphire, Mckenzie and Journey
Cottage Babies EV Skirts
Traveling with Journey,my blog
travelinmom is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-19-2007, 04:06 PM   #8
GrahamBaby4
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Colorado
Posts: 799
My Mood:
Re: Serious Problems with my 7yr old

small step update. I did call a friend of mine (a mother to one of the girls in his class) who does mostly drug rehab therapy and family therapy and we discussed the whole incident and how he doesn't take any responsibility for his actions, she gave me a few names of individuals to contact who do play therapy since he doesn't take responsibility and therefore can show no remorse for his actions, but because she knows him and has enjoyed talking to him over the last few years and he trust her and will tell her anything whereas most adults he can "fool" into thinking he isn't as smart as he is and he really doesn't know. So she said if these three names don't come through call her back and we will figure out something. She really doesn't want to do therapy on a child she knows for multiple reasons, and I totally understand, and I told her that because she knows him and he loves talking to her it was just the first person that popped into my mind for him to talk to about what he is going through. She completely agrees but would like him to see someone else.
So I will be doing lots of phone calls and seeing if medicaid will pay for any of it.
__________________
Michelle WAHM to
Dalton 7/99, Hayden 3/02, Tyler 9/03, Kaitlin 10/07
www.workathomeunited.com/askmehow
GrahamBaby4 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-19-2007, 04:17 PM   #9
Infinity's Avatar
Infinity
Registered Users
Formerly: five-littlemonkeys
seller
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Nestled in the Redwood forests of CA
Posts: 3,268
My Mood:
Re: Serious Problems with my 7yr old

I agree. Get him mentally evaluated by a professional outside of the educational/school system. They don’t like to pay for helping kids so they error on the side of everythings ok. Your DS sounds so much like my little brother it’s creepy!! He’s bipolar and on high doses of two kinds of antipsychotics, sees a phyc 2 times a week and has a behavioral specialists that comes in the home or to activities (ie school, gymnastics) once a week. My mom has had to learn how to discipline him differently and teach him wrong from right.

GL getting him and you some help!!
__________________
Jen Our house is LOUD & messy, full of love and we have a blast!
6/98 Alex, 3/00 Ender, 7/04 (our "Beans") Aeryn & Ashe, 6/06 (Bug) Asterix, and 12/08 (Midg) Atreyu


Infinity is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-19-2007, 09:45 PM   #10
JustAugust's Avatar
JustAugust
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Cloud 9
Posts: 12,049
My Mood:
Re: Serious Problems with my 7yr old

Quote:
Originally Posted by ferrferr View Post
Woah. mama....

I'd get him in to see a therapist ASAP. Aggression like that is NOT okay at any age, and the fact that he verbalized killing people when he gets older would be like getting hit by a big red truck. There is WAY more going on in his head that needs to be straighted out.
I agree. That is really really scary.

My niece has Aspergers and some of that DOES sounds really similar to her. You might ask about that.
__________________
Tiffany, Mama to the incredible JM (3.25.06) , NC (7.28.10) and EH (9.23.13)
We don't vaccinate, we kept our sons intact, we use cloth diapers, we co-sleep, we extended RF, we breastfeed, but we watch too much tv and I totally dig plastic! Everyone has their issues, lol.
JustAugust is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Copyright 2005 - 2014 Escalate Media. All Rights Reserved.