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Old 09-26-2007, 12:00 PM   #1
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Special needs mamas, ? for you...

I'm sure some of you read my post about my dd. She hasn't been diagnosed yet (Possibly aspergers?, emotional issues, or something else) and we are still finding resources to help her and what the best route would be. Anyway, I have a family member that is supportive, but also doubts there is anything wrong with my dd. Dh and I don't want something to be wrong with her, we just see a lot of things going on with her that don't seem "normal" and we want to get it checked out. This family member has my dd (and other kids) over once a week or more and she says that she is pretty good there and doesn't have a problem. She said that we must see more than she sees. Sometimes I question myself because of this and wondering if we are making a molehill out of nothing. But I really do think something is wrong. I start to doubt myself though. Any of you have this experience?
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Old 09-26-2007, 12:09 PM   #2
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Re: Special needs mamas, ? for you...

yes we did. My son saw a SLEW of people. They all diagnosed him with something. Autism, Aspergers, Adhd + sensory integration disorder + emotional immaturity + speech delay (ummm add that up whats it look like to you?) etc etc. Not ONE said he was normal. All but one said he'd *never* be in mainstream classes. Still, our friends and family said he was fine, just being a boy, just a late talker, etc etc.
Its hard. It gets easier.
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Old 09-26-2007, 12:13 PM   #3
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Re: Special needs mamas, ? for you...

We've gone through the same thing. I just smile and say "thanks for encouraging me! We're just checking it out because my mommy radar is screaming." Then I smile and move on. I don't have to convince anyone about what is best for my child.
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Old 09-26-2007, 12:24 PM   #4
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Re: Special needs mamas, ? for you...

Thanks ladies SOrry that you all are going through the same thing, but glad that I'm not alone. I really needed the encouragement today
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Old 09-26-2007, 12:28 PM   #5
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Re: Special needs mamas, ? for you...

I am going thru the same thign right this moment! I know it is hard to see your child not "normal". We donot have a diagnosis yet either, I want her to be fine more than anything,but at the same time I want a diagnosis so we can move foward! i know it is frustrating. PM me if you want to chat. I can always use a shoulder
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Old 09-26-2007, 12:28 PM   #6
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Re: Special needs mamas, ? for you...

Heh. My DS has had a diagnosis since he was 10 days old (he has an actual brain malformation, so its a concrete thing, kwim? You can see it on MRI!). But, my family still loves to say that there's nothing wrong with him. They're just in denial. It pisses me off because its like it cheapens what he is able to do, ya know?

Anyway, if YOU feel there is something wrong, it will not hurt to find out - but if you let it go, you could waste precious time that your DD could have been getting help so go with your gut!
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Old 09-26-2007, 12:39 PM   #7
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Re: Special needs mamas, ? for you...

Quote:
Originally Posted by urchin_grey View Post
But, my family still loves to say that there's nothing wrong with him. They're just in denial. It pisses me off because its like it cheapens what he is able to do, ya know?
Yes, exactly. My son has a rare chromosome disorder (partial trisomy 1), and my MIL is always saying, "There's nothing wrong with that child!" when it is obvious he is delayed. HELLO, he's three months shy of 2 and just started crawling, for crying out loud.

Not that I want something to be wrong with my kid, but you know what I'm talking about. I'm his mother, I'm aware of what he is doing, and I know when something is wrong. Not to mention that he has a diagnosed condition.

Go with your gut. If you think something is off, there is no harm in checking it out. If you're correct, you can start therapies/interventions, which will benefit your daughter immensely. You're doing the right thing.

-Betsy
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Old 09-26-2007, 01:13 PM   #8
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Re: Special needs mamas, ? for you...

Quote:
Originally Posted by urchin_grey View Post
Heh. My DS has had a diagnosis since he was 10 days old (he has an actual brain malformation, so its a concrete thing, kwim? You can see it on MRI!). But, my family still loves to say that there's nothing wrong with him. They're just in denial. It pisses me off because its like it cheapens what he is able to do, ya know?
OH ME TOO! My DD has PVL which is brain damage that shows up on an MRI and still certain people in our lives would say "Oh she's fine!" or "That's normal" or "she'll outgrow that" and it drove me nuts. You expressed exactly how I feel with that.

I would go with you and your DHs feelings and try to believe in yourself as the best judge of your kid. I think it's really uncomfortable for people who aren't involved in special needs kids lives to admit and talk about it.
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Old 09-26-2007, 06:22 PM   #9
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Re: Special needs mamas, ? for you...

YES!!!! I thought I was the only one that thought this way. Madeline's OT has said she has SID aswell as the other thearpist she has seen. She went for her Feeding Clinic Evaluation this past Monday and they want to see her 2 times a week for OT, Speech and Feeding. They also mentioned to use of getting her into a developmental pedi and possiably a neruoligist (for night terrors and some other things). When I called my mom & told her all she said was that's a lot of testing for such a baby and she does eat and starting to talk....basically implying that it was not needed (or that's what I thought and felt). MIL said that DH was a picky eater and she saw nothing wrong with it either. It makes me doubt myself that what I am seeing (and apparently all her specilist, my DH and her thearpist) is really there. I was in tears after talking with both my mom and MIL about this due to the lack of emotional support from both of them.

Anyway, I am so glad I am not the only one out there experiancing this emotion.
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Old 09-26-2007, 07:06 PM   #10
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Re: Special needs mamas, ? for you...

i have

DD was behind and i knew she was and my mom kept telling me "shes a preemie, shell catch up"-- i knew she wouldnt- something was wrong. I got her evaluated and sure enough my DD was as far behind in all areas of development as 6m!!!! now a program called Help Me Grow works with her in our home 1x every other week and she is only 2-3m behind in gross motor and now we found out speech...

even the Pedi said DD was "just a preemie, shell catch up" when i finally said no she needs evaluated, something isnt right.
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