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Old 08-16-2006, 08:51 AM   #1
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Is this normal baby behavior?

My 9 month old dd is very independant. I have been wearing her since she was a newborn, and have really tried my best to form a secure attachment with her.

She is very resistant to cuddling. Occasionally she will put her head down on my chest but its rare. Mostly when I try to cuddle her she pushes me away. She also resists being comforted. When she is upset and crying, she tries to push me away when I try to comfort her. When she falls and hurts herself and I pick her up for kisses and hugs she does the same. I am not going to lie, this hurts my feelings. She also wont take food from me, other than her bottle. She has to feed herself or she wont eat it... forget even trying to spoon feed her. This is very opposite of Celeste, who was always such a cuddle bug and still is. She still sleeps with me occasionally and always wants hugs and kisses.

I wonder if this is normal baby behavior? Is it just her personality? Did I do something wrong?

I do notice she prefers me (and her sister) to other people, even dh. She doesnt go with strangers, will smile at them but if someone tries to hold her she turns to me and burys her head. IF they try to pick her up she cries until I take her back. She gets very excited and happy when she sees me come in the room. If someone else is holding her and she sees me usually she wants to come with me. She is a very happy baby, and is almost always smiling.
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Old 08-16-2006, 08:58 AM   #2
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Re: Is this normal baby behavior?

my older dd is exactly the same and was when she was a baby too! I think your dd is just an independant baby! my dd still doesn't cuddle much, but when she's sick or just having a bad day I get cuddles!! with dd we just decided when she needs us she'll come to us, it would really frustrait her if we tried to get her to cuddle or hold her and stuff lol. She started putting herself to bed at about 7 months old too, didn't want to be rocked to sleep anymore. I'd just put her in bed and she'd talk to herself till she fell asleep! i think your baby's completely normal!!
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Old 08-16-2006, 08:59 AM   #3
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Smile Re: Is this normal baby behavior?

Totally normal, that's just who she is! My first DD is was like that, she was always so independent and grown up. Didn't have the need/want to be cuddled. She is now 2.5 and is starting to cuddle more, she will actually sit with me!!! Wahoo! I also have a 7 month old who is a total cuddlebug, thank goodness because I needed a cuddler. Enjoy her unique personality, she will show you affection in different ways!
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Old 08-16-2006, 09:41 AM   #4
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Re: Is this normal baby behavior?

You described my little guy to a T!!! He's almost 11 months and has NEVER been a cuddler. I breastfeed and he also has never comfort nurses....he gets what he needs and then he is outta there. It hurts my feelings to, but like you said, I know I'm his favorite person so I try to focus on that.

He also comes to me wanting to be held then as soon as I pick him up, he wants down.

I think it's just personality. some babies are born cuddlers and some aren't. But as long as he's healthy and happy and knows I'm always there for him, I try not to let it bother me.
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Old 08-16-2006, 11:33 AM   #5
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Re: Is this normal baby behavior?

My son use to be the same way. He has gotten cuddlier as he has gotten older. He just wanted to explore everything! He didn't have time to sit still and be cuddled. Now that he has more control over his enviornment, some of he's curiosity has be relieved, so he sits still some and cuddles more. Which I love!
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Old 08-16-2006, 11:40 AM   #6
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Re: Is this normal baby behavior?

Sounds normal to me!

My best friend's oldest DD was that was from birth, it seemed. I remember even when she got to be 3 or 4 her playing with her dolls and Melissa had her feelings hurt, because she wanted to play alone
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Old 08-16-2006, 01:47 PM   #7
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Re: Is this normal baby behavior?

my 16 month old has been that way since 10 months the only time she wants to be cuddled is at bedtime. We are having a hard time with her right now cause she refuses to sleep at all
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Old 08-16-2006, 09:00 PM   #8
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Re: Is this normal baby behavior?

Hard as it may be for you, unless your ped says to worry, I would think it's normal.
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Old 08-17-2006, 08:51 AM   #9
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Re: Is this normal baby behavior?

Just pm'd you!
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Old 08-20-2006, 03:58 PM   #10
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Re: Is this normal baby behavior?

Its normal! She's just getting to that age where she'd rather play and explore. My DS did the same thing. =)
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