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Old 05-27-2010, 12:49 AM   #1
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Just Curious....

Another question made me think of this. We aren't planning anymore babies (maybe for a while, maybe never, idk), but I'd like to be informed just in case...

When I had my son it was in a birthing center attached to a hospital. Overall it was a good experience for the most part (I loved not having to leave my room...ever) and not having to share a room at all. I'm not a people person when it comes to private things KWIM? I think if I had to share a room after childbirth I would have a nervous breakdown. I was so nervous as it was...

Anyway, my question is, can you TELL the nursing staff to leave you alone? You know how they pop in every 5 seconds...can you just tell them not to? If I had a question I knew to ring the buzzer but I didn't need them coming in all the time. I was trying to learn to breastfeed (turns out I have hypoplastic breast tissue so it was pretty pointless but I still tried) and I was bleeding and trying to rest when I could and they were ALWAYS coming in. Usually it was a quick knock and then they'd let themselves in too so I had to cover my goods up really quick...

I KNOW they see worse stuff all the time, but its really just not my thing. I didn't even want DH to see me nursing.

So CAN you tell them not to come in?

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Old 05-27-2010, 02:26 AM   #2
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Re: Just Curious....

It's your day at the hospital for you and your family, it should be YOUR way! I would think it's totally fine to as for more privacy and less drop-ins. If you're nervous about asing them, put it in a nice way like "I'd really like to spend this time bonding with my family, would it be possible to ask that the nurses come in only when I call them?" Of course they have to come in for tests and all, but I don't think it's unreasonable to ask at all. It doesn't sound like you were having and real serious medical issues that they'd have to pop in so often.

Good luck if you're in the situation again
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Old 05-27-2010, 07:07 AM   #3
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Re: Just Curious....

Your BC experience sounds like my 3 hospital experiences (staff barging in 24/7, my babies never left my room, never shared a room, etc).. When I had my one BC birth, it was at a stand alone BC and I left 7 hours after giving birth. I only had one nurse in my room after the birth and that was to clean up all the mess, make sure I was Ok and then she let DH, ds2, and me sleep for a few hours before we left.
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Old 05-27-2010, 08:06 AM   #4
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Re: Just Curious....

As long as you are having no complications you can tell them to limit their intrusions. They do have to come and check on you at most hospitals EVERY HOUR for safety reasons and to cover their but, but some will make exceptions to come in less often. I know it sucks but it is for your own safety. Many women don't recognize things going wrong without a little assistance from their nurse. My hospital often will only come in every 3 or 4 hours if they are comfortable with your healing.
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Old 05-27-2010, 08:18 AM   #5
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Re: Just Curious....

I would politely request it.

We got very lucky and the nurses came in as little as possible and did their best to only come in if they could tell we were up anyway. I think they had to check on us at least every four hours, but with a newborn, we were up that often anyway.

It was a hospital birthing center with three rooms and at least three nurses most of the time, so I think that helped, because they didn't have to worry about a schedule and seeing all the patients in a certain amount of time.
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Old 05-27-2010, 09:25 AM   #6
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Re: Just Curious....

Quote:
Originally Posted by CherryPie View Post
Your BC experience sounds like my 3 hospital experiences (staff barging in 24/7, my babies never left my room, never shared a room, etc).. When I had my one BC birth, it was at a stand alone BC and I left 7 hours after giving birth. I only had one nurse in my room after the birth and that was to clean up all the mess, make sure I was Ok and then she let DH, ds2, and me sleep for a few hours before we left.
Yeah, this is basically what I was going to say. Birth centers that are attached to hospitals are a lot like hospitals. I wouldn't go to one like that. By going to an independent birth center, you don't have these problems. For me, there was one nurse (and I knew her because I'd seen her at the center many times throughout the pregnancy!). She was there to assist our midwife during the birth and also to help out afterward, but her role in things was very non-invasive. Afterward, she even helped my husband get my food ready so I could eat! LOL It was quite nice having her there. She and our midwife were the only people there other than me and my husband, and they were only as hands-on as we asked them to be. It was really chill.

I suggest the OP go to a non-hospital-affiliated birth center next time. It's very different, and there are no worries with nursing staff popping in every 5 minutes (seriously, WTF?) because there is no traditional nursing staff, as there would be in a hospital, just a few people, and you know them already.
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Old 05-27-2010, 09:30 AM   #7
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Re: Just Curious....

You can request it but like a pp said, each hospital has their policies about how often patients should be checked on, checking vitals, etc. They are used to moms needing a lot of attention and needing help each step of the way. Plus you will have other people coming in like your OB, ped, photographer, nurses, meal and clean up staff. It's just the nature of staying at a hospital. I wouldn't get your hopes up but it is possible that they would limit the intrusions a little bit. You can also put a not on your door saying "mommy nursing, enter only if necessary" and that should keep some of them away, at least they will come back after 20 or 30 min.
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Old 05-27-2010, 10:13 AM   #8
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Re: Just Curious....

Yeah looking back it was basically like a hospital birth I suppose. I remember after he was born (he was born at 8pm) they let my "visitors" (aka, everyone and their mother who I did NOT invite to come see me) into my room until 11pm! I was furious about people showing up that late and even madder that they had let these people in. Then we finally go to bed, the baby falls asleep around 2am and the nurses come in at 4am, turn on the lights, and proceed to tell me that the shift is changing and "introduce" me to the new nurse. I couldn't give a care less who my new nurse OR old nurse was, I just didn't want them in my room at 4am when we had just gotten to sleep! I know they have to make sure we are alive, and do testing and whatnot, but nurse introductions are not even remotely important...quite frankly I wouldn't have remembered what the first nurse looked like anyway so I wouldn't have known they switched...its not like I was attached to her KWIM?

They did also push a c-section BIG TIME. I was induced and he wasn't fitting out (IMO they just weren't giving me enough time though, I'd only been pushing for an hour and a half). I kept trying, adamently refused their c-section (they literally had 20 staff people in the room preparing for a c-section..and like I said I'm private so I wanted this people OUT...some of the nurses were just standing around giggling and chit chatting). I finally lost it, told everyone to get the %#@$ out and all but one nurse left. My baby then crowned, he DID come out without a csection. He had a broken shoulder, but that was better than having a csection (only took him 3 weeks to heal).

Before we left the hospital they sent a social worker into my room (while my DH was gone feeding the dogs of course) to talk to me about putting my son up for adoption (their reasoning was that because my DH was unemployed and I wasn't working we should give the baby up....seriously!). I explained that he had unemployment and got money from the GI bill for going to school so we actually did pretty good and they just wouldn't drop it. I later complained to the higher ups about this because with my already crashing hormones THIS incident about ruined me, I was devastated that "everyone" thought we shouldn't keep our baby...it wasn't everyone obviously, but that's how it was in my crazy PPD mind. And then when my DH came back they told him "it looks like you will be leaving with TWO babies" because I was crying about them dogging me about adoption...

They also kept us for 3 days based on my son's shoulder being broken, but I don't think it was necessary.

God, now that I'm REALLY thinking about it my birth experience was terrible...I won't go back there.


Quote:
Originally Posted by CherryPie View Post
Your BC experience sounds like my 3 hospital experiences (staff barging in 24/7, my babies never left my room, never shared a room, etc).. When I had my one BC birth, it was at a stand alone BC and I left 7 hours after giving birth. I only had one nurse in my room after the birth and that was to clean up all the mess, make sure I was Ok and then she let DH, ds2, and me sleep for a few hours before we left.
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Old 05-27-2010, 10:42 AM   #9
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Re: Just Curious....

Yeah that's just their new way of wording the L&D unit of a hospital, my old one had a sign above the entrance that said "Birthing Center" but it was far from a birth center! LOL
Like a PP said, as long as you don't have any complications, you can ask them to only check on you when required (like shift changes, food service) or if you buzz. I dont' know why they wouldn't be able to accomidate that. Otherwise you can check out AMA and go home whenever you want.
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Old 05-27-2010, 11:18 AM   #10
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Re: Just Curious....

Wow. Guess I was lucky, because my experience at a hospital was nothing like pp have described. I had a nurse stay with us for about an hour after the birth to get us settled in to our postpartum room and make sure breastfeeding was going well. The same nurse stopped by every few hours for that afternoon, but after that my CNM or one of two nurses checked at shift changes only. They would knock on the door and ask if it was okay to come in. My DS never left my side and we co-slept there in the hospital. The only other staff we had stop by was a lactation consultant once, the person delivering meals, and the head OB when we were ready to be discharged. I didn't have to ask for this, that was the standard policy. Being a first-time mom and trying to figure out how to breastfeed, I actually buzzed my nurse to come to the room more often than that. Whether you're at a hospital or a birth center, I think you should probably find out about the policies beforehand, and let them know that privacy is important to you. If they aren't willing to give you the privacy you want, I'm sure you can find a different facility that will.
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