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Old 04-07-2011, 10:19 AM   #1
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Moms of Two?

Any advice for how to make a relatively graceful transition from having one child (3 1/2 yo DD) to being a Mom of two. I have done pretty well so far pretending that everything will be just fine, but I'm starting to panic a wee bit

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Old 04-07-2011, 01:53 PM   #2
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Re: Moms of Two?

same here!
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Old 04-07-2011, 02:36 PM   #3
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Originally Posted by jenndoxx
same here!
Ditto!!
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Old 04-07-2011, 02:37 PM   #4
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Re: Moms of Two?

I'm in the same boat - no advice yet, huh?!
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Old 04-07-2011, 02:54 PM   #5
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Re: Moms of Two?

It will all be okay, Mamas! All of my friends have said this is the hardest transition b/c you are going from spending all your time/energy/focus on your first child, and now you will need to divide it. That doesn't mean you will ignore your older child, infact I think it helps the older ones learn to take turns and see that others have needs as well. It can be really hard on a new mama when the 2 year old wants to play outside, but the baby has to nurse, or when the toddler is screaming for something to drink and you have to tell him to wait until you are done changing his brother's diaper. Those are the hard parts of being a mom of more than one, and not the actual doing of it, learning to cope w/ dividing yourself. Just know that no matter what little parts you have to give up with your first child, he or she is gaining something so much more special in having a brother or sister! OF course the firstborn isn't the center stage anymore, but they are still loved and will adjust, and baby will get easier, too. Those first few months they nurse so much it seems that the older ones cause more trouble b/c mom is busy. My DH is already preparing our boys for mom to be nursing all the time, and we tell them that when they were born that's all mom did for the first few months, so we need to let the baby nurse on mama for a while, then she will grow and be big enough to play with.

I am expecting baby #5, and honestly my DH and I both feel that she will just roll right into the routine/family with little problems. You just learn to roll with it, you know what is important and let the rest go!
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Old 04-07-2011, 07:01 PM   #6
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Re: Moms of Two?

HAHA, I'm in the same boat ladies!
DS has HORRIBLE patience, so I've already started to work on "wait a minute" with him...it's not helping a ton, but a little. I think a timer might be a good idea.
I plan on wearing DS2 as much as I can. I bought a Moby, and already have a sling and Beco from DS1. I can nurse the newbie in that, and be hands free to chase after my very active (will be 2 the week before DS2 is due) DS1.
Someone else suggested putting sippies/snacks at a lower level in the fridge (or getting some out) before nursing the baby that way if the older one is hungry they can get it themselves.
I just bought him some Jammy Sammies today from BRU, and have a bunch of snacks for him already.
Mybiggest "concern" is nursing. DS1 nursed until my milk disapeared w/pregnancy, and STILL wants to try and nurse randomly. I do NOT want to nurse him anymore. I think (even though he loves to "kiss! Hug Caleb!" my belly) We're going to have major jealousy issues over that. I try to tell him milk is for Caleb, and he freaks. I try to offer him some banana milk (Like strawberry milk; it's the only milk he'll drink) and sometimes he'll take it, but other times he's still mad and tries to nurse.
I can nurse him. I know that. But I'm still touched out from nursing him...I'm not really looking forward to nursing the newbie. I know if I let him nurse he'll be attatched all day long and not let his brother. LOL. and I just cannot nurse two of them like that! >_<
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Old 04-08-2011, 10:06 AM   #7
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Re: Moms of Two?

Great to read these...keep 'em comin'! I AM grateful to have a little older and therefore more independent child who also does SEEM to be very caring and gentle with babies, but I'm SURE there with nonetheless be a little jealousy going on b/c she's had my attention for even longer!
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Old 04-08-2011, 12:15 PM   #8
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Re: Moms of Two?

I am in the same boat as well. I did find out that the hospital that we use has a sibling class and hoping to get ds into one in the next couple weeks.
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