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Old 06-15-2007, 11:13 AM   #31
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Re: When can we expect toddlers to listen?

I think my toddler listens better than my DH All kids are different. My DS listened perfectly until he hit the magic number 5 and it's been all down hill since. But my DD is learning slowly but surely.

Now I just have to work on DH, because he doesn't listen for anything

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Old 06-15-2007, 02:20 PM   #32
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Re: When can we expect toddlers to listen?

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Originally Posted by erin_brycesmom View Post
Mama, can you explain how a baby standing in a chair at the table is impolite? I can't think of any reason that it would be. I don't think I'm being extreme, it is my child's nature to want to stand - that is all I meant by that.



I haven't studied every culture so I'm not sure but I think you are talking about adults. I seriously doubt that there aren't other cultures who allow babies to stand while they eat. Why? Because it is easier, lol...easier for the child to stand and easier for the parent as opposed to enfocring arbitrary rules.



My child does not balance one arm on the table. If he did, I suppose I would try to help him do it another way but if in the end he really wanted to stand with one arm on the table and eat that way, I don't think I personally would try to stop him because I can't think of any good reason to. My children get food on the chair and floor regardless. This is just my choice mama, if you feel a different scenario is best I can fully respect that.



I don't enforce rules because they are more likely to do something else. I am absolutely opposed to such thought. First, I don't even agree that they are more likely to climb on the table, second - climbing on the table is a completely seperate issue. That is not the message I want to send my child. Just as I would not appreciate such actions against adults.



I didn't say that. If you ask questions you are going to get responses. Please don't ask questions like this if you are going to get upset at honest responses about what we expect.
We're just going to have to agree to disagree. I think you are taking a very small issue such as expecting a child to stay seated for 15 minutes through dinner and making it into something much larger. I am not, in my opinion, enforcing arbitrary rules or going against my daughter's human nature. It's my job to raise my daughter to get along in the world, and I see part of that job as teaching her manners, which in our home includes proper table manners. We all have things that are acceptable and not acceptable in our homes, and we all have the right to choose which actions are which.

And we as parents all make at least some rules based on what a child is likely or not likely to do. It's very hard for my daughter to stand at the table and control the impulse to climb onto the table. Just like how she's not allowed to use crayons in the living room because it's more likely she's color on the furniture or some other surface that would be more difficult to clean. I can't think of others right now, but I am sure we all make at least some rules with secondary behaviors in mind. Sorry you're opposed to such things, but I'm not seeing the harm. Later, when she's older and has more impulse control, I can relax such rules.
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Old 06-15-2007, 02:26 PM   #33
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Re: When can we expect toddlers to listen?

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We all have things that are acceptable and not acceptable in our homes, and we all have the right to choose which actions are which.
I agree!

Hey if it isn't arbitrary to you then we don't even have to agree to disagree. We can just agree. It would be arbitrary to me, but we are different people with different ideas.

I understand why you think I'm making this into something bigger, but I really don't think it is a big deal at all. We just have very different ideas about raising children and parenting. I feel strongly about raising my children in liberty and I am well aware that this is not the mainstream way at all. I do respect parents who choose to go the more mainstream route.
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Old 06-15-2007, 03:39 PM   #34
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Re: When can we expect toddlers to listen?

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I agree!

Hey if it isn't arbitrary to you then we don't even have to agree to disagree. We can just agree. It would be arbitrary to me, but we are different people with different ideas.

I understand why you think I'm making this into something bigger, but I really don't think it is a big deal at all. We just have very different ideas about raising children and parenting. I feel strongly about raising my children in liberty and I am well aware that this is not the mainstream way at all. I do respect parents who choose to go the more mainstream route.
nice chatting with ya
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