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Old 05-15-2011, 11:15 PM   #11
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I was in the same situation before our DS was born. I was leaning away from circ and DH was absolutely 100% positive that's what he wanted. I went so far as to schedule the procedure and then some Youtube videos of some actual circs being done on newborns had me sobbing. My DH watched them and decided he wasn't so convinced after all. Our DS is almost 17 mths and intact. =)
Pretty much our story too.

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Old 05-15-2011, 11:16 PM   #12
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Originally Posted by Jallia
I was in the same situation before our DS was born. I was leaning away from circ and DH was absolutely 100% positive that's what he wanted. I went so far as to schedule the procedure and then some Youtube videos of some actual circs being done on newborns had me sobbing. My DH watched them and decided he wasn't so convinced after all. Our DS is almost 17 mths and intact. =)
Pretty much our story too.
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Old 05-16-2011, 11:44 AM   #13
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Re: Debate with husband

Tell him it's not about what HE wants! It's not his penis! He already has what he wants (I'm assuming), let your son make that decision for himself!
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Old 05-16-2011, 11:53 AM   #14
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Re: Debate with husband

My husband was strongly against leaving ds intact (and he usually just defers to me with parenting things). I gave him all the info and he still wanted to circ, even though he totally admitted that his reasons were purely aesthetic. I finally just refused to do it. I told him that circ'ing is not reversible but leaving the child intact is. If we can't agree, then we should leave the decision at it's "default". Well, within two months after ds was born, dh came across an article in The Economist that totally convinced him that circ'ing was not that much different from female excision (I'm not interested in debating that--it's just how we interpret it). He was soooo glad we didn't circ ds.

But honestly, if you're not even pg or ttc right now, I wouldn't waste my energy debating it with your dh.
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Old 05-16-2011, 12:04 PM   #15
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Re: Debate with husband

http://www.norm-uk.org/circumcision_lost.html

http://www.mothersagainstcirc.org/fleiss.html

a couple of links I like.
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Old 05-16-2011, 12:08 PM   #16
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Re: Debate with husband

To the OP – my husband and I have had the same debate even though we are having a girl. His reasoning to me was “He is my son and I want him to look like me” Like father, like son. He also told me in his high school uncircumcised kids were made fun of – bad. He feels that society has not changed and he does not want our son to go through it.

Maybe you should try talking again to your husband. Maybe he is scared to tell you why he is for it thinking you will laugh at him or disregard his reasoning. I think my DH reasons are silly but I know they mean a lot to him.
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Old 05-16-2011, 05:35 PM   #17
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Re: Debate with husband

if you leave them intact, they can always get circed later on if they want it. if you circ, its MUCH harder to restore the foreskin later if they want it (and its not the same anyway).

my husband was for circ and we got my son circed at birth. we both regret it now. my husband has been trying to restore,, but he gave up b/c he was getting discouraged and sore.
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Old 05-16-2011, 05:50 PM   #18
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Re: Debate with husband

My DH and I disagreed as well. I had done a whole lot of research and decided against it. Talked with DH, he was for it, but honestly he hadn't given it a whole lot of thought or research. More of the philosophy that he was and it wouldn't be done unless there was a good reason so any boy we had should be circumcized.

I had the stronger opinion of the two of us. For me, all I had to do was show him a circumcision on YouTube and I knew he would cave. I know my DH really, really well

I would suggest both of you research your position, and openly share with each other your conclusions. Not debate, debate, but try and reach a decision that together you can be happy with.

For my DH and I, there are actual medical reasons to get circumcized, but very, very rarely are they present at birth and the majority of boys/men will never experience these medical reasons when left intact and even some circumcized males will still experience them. So our philosophy is that it can be done later if NEEDED (or the individual wishes to), but you can't ever truly undo it.
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