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Old 06-01-2011, 04:37 PM   #71
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Re: How many children?

I have NO desire to be pregnant or have an infant. If I was pregnant again, I'd have a VBAC and I'd WANT to "redo" and "fix" everything that went wrong with DS's birth, BUT I do not WANT to be pregnant. I don't want to be sick 20 times a day for four months straight with hyperemesis. I don't want to have to go through breastfeeding struggles again to only fail. I don't want to be constantly tired, going on zero sleep working full time. I don't want to listen to a colicky baby scream its head off (I CANNOT STAND crying! IT drove me NUTS. Sometimes I seriously wondered if I could have been THAT person that shook their baby because it made me THAT irritated!)

But I do NOT want an ONLY child. (Lol.. how do I go about fixing this problem? Do NOT want pregnancy, but don't want an only child... ugh!)

DH was always the one that said he wanted children. He said 2 or 3 . I used to have NO desire for children. I knew I'd oblige DH to have children, but I seriously did NOT want to be a mom. I had other plans, and motherhood was not in those plans. Then we had a surprise! Now he wants an ONLY child and I want one more child.


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Last edited by crunch!910; 06-01-2011 at 04:40 PM.
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Old 06-02-2011, 02:20 AM   #72
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Re: How many children?

Originally Posted by SkyeSpade View Post
We went with two for a number of reasons. We considered only one, but we wanted our child to always have someone they could (relatively) count on. We each had a sibling growing up, but we felt the age gap was too great for the reason behind a second child. So we shot for about 18 months apart. (We were off by about a month.)

We said only two because of my beliefs, which DH is beginning to agree with. I don't want to offend anyone, so just suffice to say, I believe in 1 child born per adult.
This. Short of an accident or twins, I'll only have two. I just can't, for MYSELF, reconcile a large family given my morals and lifestyle and I also don't want an only child.
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Old 06-02-2011, 06:23 AM   #73
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Re: How many children?

i'm second in a family of 6 kids and i've always wanted a big family myself. pregnancy is really hard on me, though, so we'll see. we've decided to just take each baby one at a time. =)

i will say this: we all shared rooms growing up (shared everything, really), and all have had jobs through high school and college because my parents have not paid for college for any of us (they fiscally can't, but even if they were wealthy enough, i'm not sure they would have). i really appreciate how this has made each of us grow up and take responsibility for our own education and our own money-- i had SO many friends in college whose parents were paying for everything and you could really tell that because they weren't putting their own hard-earned money down they didn't take as much responsibility or work/care as much.

of course, this is not always the case. but i am just very thankful for the if-you-want-it-you-make-it-happen approach to parenting that my parents took when we were old enough to make money ourselves.

all that being said, MONEY is not a consideration when we think about how many children to have. my DH makes $8,000 per year and we have a baby with another on the way. we are all healthy and happy. =)
rebekah: wife to one, mother to two, teacher to many.

Last edited by ransom; 06-02-2011 at 06:24 AM.
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Old 06-02-2011, 08:10 AM   #74
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Re: How many children?

Our third is 3.5 months old, and I know I'd like another, but my wife has the uterus, so it's really up to her, and she's not sure, yet. I'm just going forward with the idea in the back of my head that we'll try for another in the next 9-18 months because if i stop and think that DS2 might, in fact, be our last, it's painful. if we don't have another, i will have some pretty serious grief about it. i just feel like our family is not yet complete.
SAHD to J 12.27.05, M 12.27.08, and A 2.15.11.
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Old 06-02-2011, 09:13 AM   #75
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Re: How many children?

We were done at 2.. lol But with Levi, we are SOOOOO done.

Miranda is in the middle of being Diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. Jake is a crazy toddler. I babysit a 1 year old FT. With a newborn, I'm probably going to literally loose my mind. I already feel like I am.. lol

But we were stopping at 2 because of all the reasons most likely listed.. Space in the house, space in the car, things were easier with 2, cheaper with 2. We don't plan on paying for college, but just raising 3 kids is going to cost a fortune. lol not to mention sanity..

Levi was a surprise. It's going to be interesting. lol
Jennifer; Mom to:
Miranda Isabel(ASD/Anxiety/ODD/SPD) (11) Jacob David(Anxiety/SPD)(7)
& Levi Alexander(ASD/Anxiety/SPD) (4.5)
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