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Old 06-02-2011, 05:47 AM   #31
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Originally Posted by carriek38
I hovered really quick & I thought you were talking about transgendered people...Female To Male .
I think I'll just start reading it that way in my head. Then it really won't bother me.

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Old 06-03-2011, 11:43 AM   #32
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Re: Acronym really bothering me

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I can understand this. I, too, and frustrated by the Mommy wars. I feel we women (as a whole) have enough on our plates. The last thing we need between us is divsion.
I'm new to this forum, but I feel this exactly. Well said!
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Old 06-03-2011, 11:01 PM   #33
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Re: Acronym really bothering me

I used to think of myself as a "full-time mommy" when I was a single WAHM with my daughter for 3 years, and then even more of a "full-time mommy" when my twins were born and I became single once again. I don't recall thinking that married (or non-single) moms and WOHM's were "less than" full-time moms though. It was rough though. Being a single WAHM was rougher on me emotionally than being a WOHM with a partner now. It just seems easier having the help of a partner, and getting time away from my children for a few hours of the day..... I hope that doesn't make me sound like a bad mommy, not like I NEED a break from my kids or anything.
I loved being a WAHM but I love being a WOHM now too! There are pros and cons of each. I still consider myself a full time mom though, even working out of the home! I don't stop being a mom when I go to work, and really, the way I think about it is that I go to work outside of the home so that I can provide for my children better! I loved being a WAHM but I couldn't afford health insurance working at home.
I do the best I can. I guess that's what it boils down to!

ETA - OOps I didn't mean to make it sound like anyone else isn't doing the best they can. I meant it more like "I do the best I can with what I've got" which is what I think every parent strives to do. I don't like feeling judged as much as the next person, so I try not to do it. Just do the best you can with what you've got, and that should be enough for you. Who cares what anyone else thinks
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Old 06-03-2011, 11:18 PM   #34
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Re: Acronym really bothering me

I know several people who refuse to call themselves SAHMs because they think that makes them sound like some one who lounges on the couch eating bon-bons and watching soaps. They think SAHM sounds lazy, where as full-time parent says what they feel they are- parents going-going-going round the clock to take care of the kiddos. They take offense to being called SAHPs. I think people choose to take offense too easily.

I honestly don't have an opinion. Labels annoy me. I'm so much more than a SAHM, WAHM, WOHM, FTM, wife, CDer, BWer, EBFer, CLWer, etc, etc, etc, etc, etc, continuous. Why try to box yourself in with a bunch of labels? I'm me- a happy chick with three kids, one husband, making the best choices we know how to make a happy life for ourselves and our kids.
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Old 06-05-2011, 09:10 PM   #35
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Re: Acronym really bothering me

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So you are saying that there are full time moms and 'part time' moms?
Most definitely there are full-time and part-time parents.
I don't consider any mother or father that works but still loves, takes care of, spends time with, etc.. their children a part-time parent.
But, for example, Robert.. my ex.. I consider him a part-time parent and he even tells me that he only wants her sometimes when he feels like it. He doesn't miss her all of the time. He takes her for like 3-4hours a week.. maybe less and besides that, could care less how she is doing, never calls nor asks. That, to me, is a part-time parent. I work PT, go to school FT, and I consider myself a "home-maker" as well and I would smack someone if they said I wasn't a full-time mother because I'm not home 24/7.

Another example.. My friend's cousin leaves her kids with his parents (so.. his cousin's aunt and uncle) with her kids for MONTHS at a time. She leaves the middle child with them every year for 5 years for about 5-6months at a time. Now, she has a 3 year old and they have kept him on and off for a year.. The longest stretch being 5 months. And.. she doesn't call nor stop by when she drops them off. They are supposed to stay for the weekend and end up there for months. A total part-time mom.. if its not his parents, its his grandparents or someone else with the kids.. she never keeps them for more than 2-4 weeks at a time.
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Old 06-05-2011, 09:26 PM   #36
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Re: Acronym really bothering me

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Most definitely there are full-time and part-time parents.
I don't consider any mother or father that works but still loves, takes care of, spends time with, etc.. their children a part-time parent.
But, for example, Robert.. my ex.. I consider him a part-time parent and he even tells me that he only wants her sometimes when he feels like it. He doesn't miss her all of the time. He takes her for like 3-4hours a week.. maybe less and besides that, could care less how she is doing, never calls nor asks. That, to me, is a part-time parent. I work PT, go to school FT, and I consider myself a "home-maker" as well and I would smack someone if they said I wasn't a full-time mother because I'm not home 24/7.

Another example.. My friend's cousin leaves her kids with his parents (so.. his cousin's aunt and uncle) with her kids for MONTHS at a time. She leaves the middle child with them every year for 5 years for about 5-6months at a time. Now, she has a 3 year old and they have kept him on and off for a year.. The longest stretch being 5 months. And.. she doesn't call nor stop by when she drops them off. They are supposed to stay for the weekend and end up there for months. A total part-time mom.. if its not his parents, its his grandparents or someone else with the kids.. she never keeps them for more than 2-4 weeks at a time.
I know people like this too!!!
My ex husband? Put it this way, he is the father, but is definitely not their Daddy!!! Ex husband is less then a part-timer!
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Old 09-08-2012, 10:50 AM   #37
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Re: Acronym really bothering me

i know many people who ARE part-time parents. As in, when it's not their turn to have the kids, or when the kids are staying with grandparents, or the kids are at day care, the parents are totally MIA. As in, "don't call me, I'm not on duty right now". They also feel that way when they are out with their friends or on vacations. I am "on break from my kids right now" they say. Some of these are my family members and some are neighbors. I kid you not. People actually think that they get to "quit" being a parent when they feel that they need a break. Let's face it, there are just some lazy parents out there in every type of situation.
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Old 09-08-2012, 12:02 PM   #38
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Re: Acronym really bothering me

Yeah, I remember a commercial not that long ago (so glad I don't have cable anymore!) that touted the mom the commercial revolved around as a full time mom. That ticked me off. I may WOH, but I'm still a full time parent tyvm. I still have to get up at 2 am and soothe a crying child who's had a nightmare, and then still get up at 6am and attempt to use my brain at work.

I've done both. I've been the full time WOHM, the full on SAHM and the part time WOHM. They all have great benefits and they all have things about them that suck. I wish all moms would have the opportunity to see both sides like I have and realize this, we'd be far more understanding and these stupid mommy wars might actually come to an end. With rare exception we're all trying to raise our kids the best way we know how and not go crazy doing it.
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