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Old 06-18-2011, 06:50 PM   #11
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Re: I HATE BFING!!!!!!!

Oh, mama. I am so sorry. I know how you feel...I experienced some PPD with my son, and this sounds an awful lot like it!

I'm glad you're committing to the breastfeeding relationship, but lemme give you some advice:
1) Pump - it sounds like you need a break, and it'd be nice to have someone else feed your daughter while you get some time away!
2) Try different things to soothe - so that when she's on the breast, she's eating. That's it. Keep offering the pacifier if you think it might help.
3) Know that it will get better. She'll nurse less frequently, and then she'll start solids. It won't be 12x a day forever!

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Old 06-18-2011, 11:15 PM   #12
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Try quickly switching from your nipple to a paci

And get urself checked, it sounds like ppd and exhaustion. Med can help.

Make a break for yourself. If the bf doesnt get u a break is tgere other family around or childcare at your gym?
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Old 06-19-2011, 12:16 PM   #13
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Re: I HATE BFING!!!!!!!

1. You don't have to not eat junk. Your body takes whatever nutrients it needs for your milk first and then you get the leftovers. You should be fine if you keep taking your prenatals. As far as the organic thing, well, that's up to you. But I'll say that any and all drive-throughs were my friend with DD1.

2. You can definitely drink. I found that red wine made DD fussy for some odd reason, but that also could be because the few times I had it were at family holiday parties when she was still a NB, and it could have more likely just been the disruption to her routine. I LOVED margaritas. Never got more than a small buzz, but I'm such a lightweight that a single margarita gives me a decent buzz and two puts me into a coma, LOL. I never worried about pumping and dumping. The amount of alcohol in your blood is the same as the amount in your BM at any given time, and it leaves your BM at the same rate. Just don't drink/pump until you feel like it's mostly passed. (And if you're really worried, there's all those great charts out there meant to help prevent drunk driving that show how fast alcohol leaves your blood, relatively speaking.)

3. You can even smoke when you're BFing. I don't smoke personally (never have) but there's inf0 out there (check Kellymom) that shows that it's better for babe to smoke and BF than it is to smoke and FF.

Everyone's given you some good advice about all the other stuff, so all I can add is .
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Old 06-19-2011, 02:06 PM   #14
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Re: I HATE BFING!!!!!!!

You are an AMAZING MOM! Most mothers that felt like you would have gave it up a long time ago. I have oversupply and with my dd it wasn't bad because she could keep up without choking but yes over ate and spit up ALL the time. My ds started off as such a pokey eater and I was always engorged and always pumping AND nursing him. I am his pacifier. DD still uses one at 2! Thankful down to only nap and night. Anywho, I do enjoy nursing and the cuddling but I have a very strong let down and it gets on my nerves sometimes. Once your LO is beyond that 6 month mark breastfeeding really becomes less work. They slowly start to nurse less often because they are starting solids and nurse quicker beause they are so alert. Now, my ds is 9 months and although it does get irritating with him pulling off alot, my oversupply issues have finally resolved. I think maybe once milk isn't spewing everywhere you might be able to enjoy it more. As for the public thing..it was harder for me to nurse in public with dd. I did the car thing too. Now with ds I nurse everywhere. I cover up in the public though. I carry an Aiden and Anais blanket in my diaper bag and tie two corners together and put it over my head for nursing. It works great. It's nice and big and very breathable for baby, even in hot weather.

Well, good luck and hang in there. Definately get some support of your local le leche leaders and attend the monthly meetings. That might ease your public breastfeeding shyness. They are also very helpful, supportive and become a family to you after time.
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Old 06-19-2011, 02:07 PM   #15
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Re: I HATE BFING!!!!!!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by KristieW View Post
1. You don't have to not eat junk. Your body takes whatever nutrients it needs for your milk first and then you get the leftovers. You should be fine if you keep taking your prenatals. As far as the organic thing, well, that's up to you. But I'll say that any and all drive-throughs were my friend with DD1.

2. You can definitely drink. I found that red wine made DD fussy for some odd reason, but that also could be because the few times I had it were at family holiday parties when she was still a NB, and it could have more likely just been the disruption to her routine. I LOVED margaritas. Never got more than a small buzz, but I'm such a lightweight that a single margarita gives me a decent buzz and two puts me into a coma, LOL. I never worried about pumping and dumping. The amount of alcohol in your blood is the same as the amount in your BM at any given time, and it leaves your BM at the same rate. Just don't drink/pump until you feel like it's mostly passed. (And if you're really worried, there's all those great charts out there meant to help prevent drunk driving that show how fast alcohol leaves your blood, relatively speaking.)

3. You can even smoke when you're BFing. I don't smoke personally (never have) but there's inf0 out there (check Kellymom) that shows that it's better for babe to smoke and BF than it is to smoke and FF.

Everyone's given you some good advice about all the other stuff, so all I can add is .
Yes...like she said
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Old 06-19-2011, 03:38 PM   #16
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Re: I HATE BFING!!!!!!!

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Originally Posted by Mom2Lucas View Post
What about the whole D-MER thing? That could be it too

To be honest I'm not too much of a fan either but it's because she's so picky and fussy but we are still going but there's days I could just quit.
Yes, look into D-MER. D-MER has been mistaken for PPD for some time now. I have a bad case of it but did not know about it or seek any help. 15 months of resenting my DD later, I realized what it was and weaned. I'll be EPing this next baby and I'm hoping I don't have to deal with the D-MER then.
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Old 06-19-2011, 04:29 PM   #17
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Re: I HATE BFING!!!!!!!

Totally know how you feel. I think the hardest thing for me is just sitting and nursing. There's just too much to be done and when DD is in her can't sleep unless the boob is in her mouth kick, I want to go insane.

I second what many mamas on here say and really, I wouldn't worry about food unless you notice your baby having a reaction. I ate like crap during part of the time nursing DD and I don't eat the greatest nursing now. I really think that's all one more way to discourage moms from breastfeeding in the first place because many decide not to for that reason alone and if not being able to eat what you want is making it harder than don't restrict yourself so much because you will go nuts. I know, I did. I eat oreo cookies and pizza and I've had the occasional drink at night after she's in bed, etc. If the baby doesn't react to what you eat, then you're fine (mine reacted to some things when she was younger so I had to change a few things but she out grew it).

Oh and pumping? I hate it and despise it and loathe it and I've had both an electric and manual pump. I have VERY large breasts and pumping was a huge PITA. For that reason, I also don't like nursing in public. I don't even own a nursing bra because it's hard for me to find nursing bras that fit my breasts but nursing her in my bra isn't much easier. And I don't like nursing in front of other people. Obviously, I'll nurse her rather than have her scream but this is my second and I still hate nursing in public and I'm always very worried that someone is going to say something even though there's a fine here for harassing BFing moms.

(((HUGS))) I hope you get some answers. I don't think formula feeding is necessarily easier than breastfeeding because I still think you have other things you'd have to do instead, you know? And this may sound bad but in a few months, she will be old enough for solids and that can help. I had the added issue of the fact that my baby is small and she eats regular food constantly. I don't think she'll nurse as long as DD and I'm okay with that. Feel kind of guilty sometimes because it seems like I don't nurse her often enough but she eats food, she drinks water, and she nurses but nursing is not as big of a priority now but at this point, I just do the best I can. Do the best you can, ok!
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Old 06-19-2011, 06:27 PM   #18
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Re: I HATE BFING!!!!!!!

Thank you for all the replies...I guess I'm not the only one! Reading all of this really helped....maybe I do have D-MER. How have you other mamas who've experienced this dealt with it??
Yeah I'm sure some of my breastfeeding issues have progressively gotten worse because I'm stressed out. I never get any alone time. I felt really sick last night with a migraine and still didn't feel good today, I ask my BF to watch the baby for like...2 HOURS, just give me 2!!!!! No, couldn't even do that. Sometimes I think to myself, am I asking too much from him? But I don't think I am. He isn't doing anything right now. He hasn't worked in over a month or gone to school, he's on a break from school and hasn't left the house for 2 weeks...he hasn't watched her hardly at all. Instead he's been hanging out with his friends, staying up til 7 in the morning playing video games, and then sleeping all day, leaving me by myself. His friends have been coming over right when he wakes up at 5 at night....I've talked to him about it...he says I should ask my mom for help when he can't watch her. What do you mamas think???? I feel like I'm not getting help from him....sometimes he makes me dinner...but that's it. He says I should clean more and make him dinner too...maybe I would if I wasn't so exhausted from nursing our baby all day alone!
Anyway back to breastfeeding.....I keep telling myself it won't be for forever.....And yeah the whole feeling like a milk vessel thing .

But really thankyou for the responses...I don't have very many friends with babies, no one understands.
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Old 06-19-2011, 06:33 PM   #19
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Re: I HATE BFING!!!!!!!

It sounds like you would be able to hate BFing a little less if your BF helped you out some. I know that DH, when he was here, was such a huge help... I was able to focus on getting any kinks out of my bfing relationship with my DD.

I am sorry he's being such a lame-o and I hope that you find some relief soon!!
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Old 06-19-2011, 07:03 PM   #20
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Re: I HATE BFING!!!!!!!

That's totally messed up. Kick him in the you know what. He needs to step up and be a helpful father! Wake him up during the day to do some diaper changes. He can wash pump parts too. You spend approximately 30 minutes nursing about 10-12 times a day. That's 5-6 hours a day feeding a baby! He needs to do that much too. That means wash clothes, dinner, get you snacks, and change a diaper! When that tallies up close to 5 hours then its fair. I can't stand laziness. I wish I was your neighbor. I would help you and also give him a kick in the heiny .
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