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Old 08-09-2011, 07:32 AM   #41
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Re: How to talk to teacher

First of all, I think it's great that your DD's teacher is being so cautious. I also think it's good for your DD to be thinking about what she puts into her body.

I'd bet that this is just an beginning of the year thing where the teacher has to individually tell all 11 of her students why someone is eating something different from them. She has probably told the entire class, but I've had some experience with that age group and they don't necessarily get it as a class announcement and you have to tell them repeatedly before they get it. And they will ask repeatedly. So, your DD's allergy is big news to these other 5 year olds. By the end of the year, THEY will be monitoring your DD's food to make sure it is safe for her.

Remember also that your DD's version of what is going on is just that: her version-which may or may not reflect reality. The teacher mentioning it once can very easily turn into, "My teacher talks about how I can't eat regular food all day long." (I have had a phone call or two from DD's preschool teacher because DD took, "Let's write the letter this way." and told her teacher, "I'm doing it all wrong. You tell me I do it wrong all day long." Her teacher was so upset that she had given my DD that impression. I chalked it up to my DD's dramarific streak.)

If your DD is sensitive like mine, she is probably stressed out about all sorts of things in her new environment (not in a bad way-it's just a lot of new all at once), is worn out at the end of the day, and then falls apart when she is with someone safe. (you) It is entirely possible that this is just an issue she is focusing all of her stress on. It is also entirely possible that the teacher isn't making a big deal out of it at all and your DD is just hyper sensitive about it for the first time. As she overcomes the newness and knows what to expect next, the food thing will bother her less and less. It's something she's going to have to live with for the rest of her life and she has to be ok with it.

OK. So I've rambled enough. My point is that this may not be something to make an issue of with the teacher and is more about teaching your DD to deal with her allergy and being different. A short note to the teacher, "For some reason, DD is feeling very sensitive about her Red dye allergy right now. I think it would help her to minimize discussing it and let her know that you don't see her as different from her classmates in general."


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Old 08-09-2011, 12:02 PM   #42
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Re: How to talk to teacher

I hate to say it but many teachers have a hard time knowing what to say/what not to say when dealing with a kid that is different from everyone else. I had the same problem in school, not because of any food allergies but because of my hearing and the fact that I wore a hearing aid. Some teachers REALLY felt the need to point it out, as one middle school teacher I had did and up to that point, the rest of the class wasn't aware that I was different. But oh, they sure knew after that! Some do it in the name of making sure that no one picks on little so and so for being different not realizing that what they're doing is doing just that, making sure that little so and so DOES get picked on.
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Old 08-09-2011, 12:25 PM   #43
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Re: How to talk to teacher

I'm so not looking forward to when DD starts Kindy (school in general). Daycare snacks are hard enough. We're back to the no nuts/peanuts again at Daycare. Most schools are peanut free. Going to be difficult.
DD is now 9yo and in 3rd grade. Coming back because stepdaughter just had a baby!
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