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Old 11-16-2011, 10:43 AM   #11
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Re: Circ'ing a 4 month old - pros/cons?

A toddler we know was re-circed at 2 1/2 and it was VERY painful. His was mostly just trimmed more so there was very little foreskin that needed to be released from the glans. He was given a general. The recovery was long and he had some re-adhesion. The raw skin left after the procudure is very tender and sore. I respect your personal convictions but please wait He is just leveling out after the reflux and his little body needs a break. I am sure your DH would not intend to cause him discomfort, but he would never let someone perform that procedure on his own body with only local and tylenol for pain. Follow your Mama heart.

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Old 11-16-2011, 10:54 AM   #12
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Re: Circ'ing a 4 month old - pros/cons?

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Originally Posted by mama.timms View Post
I'm going to talk to DH tonight about waiting until he's older. I know DH wants it done now... he thinks it will hurt worse, the older he gets. But the points made about pain management are great ones!

I just wish we had had it done at birth. I wish the hospital hadn't changed their policy, about allowing parents to stay with their babies during the procedure. But wishful thinking is useless in this case, I suppose.

I'm also going to see a plastic surgeon for opinions. We've seen a urologist, but I know circumcision isn't something he does often so I'm worried about that. I completely trust our pediatrician to do it... he's done them many times. He won't do it until 6 months after birth, so if we decide to wait until after 12 months, he's an option.
It will be very painful no matter how old he is. Your DS has all of the same nerves as your DH. I understand that he feels very strongly about this issue.

I am not religious personally so I am curious about his convictions. I read/hear about this often. I understood that in Christianity, Islam, and Judaism man was created by God in his image. I understand that Jewish and Muslim people circ for religious reasons as well. I am truly curious why and where the religious conviction comes from? I would love to understand better.

I understand VERY well what a challenge this can be in a marriage. When we became pregnant w/ DS I was very adament about leaving him intact. It did put a strain on our relationship. Now 8 years later I am very glad that I stood my ground. DH has even come to me and thanked me for pushing the issue.

Also, there is a Mama floating around on DS that had a VERY traumatic experience with her DS being circ'd for religious reasons. She may pop in? I know she had a blog post about it but I can't find it. Maybe she would have some insight on the religious aspect.
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Old 11-16-2011, 11:02 AM   #13
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We kept DS intact on my insistence and DH was not happy about it, which he would mention periodically after DS was born. I finally called his bluff by calling up some circ doctors locally to enquire about having it done. In my limited experience, it was difficult finding a doctor even willing to do it at my sons age (3 months old at the time). I called several doctors who said 2 months was their cut off. Which was fine with me since I wasn't going to let it happen anyways. But then again circ'ing is very uncommon where I live. So maybe it is different elsewhere.

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Old 11-16-2011, 11:06 AM   #14
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Personally, I'd do it now while he isn't too mobile and able to mess with it. I would just get it over with. I waited to have my sons frenulum cut, and we had to go completely under rather than just a quick procedure in the office. He wouldn't stop messing with it either. I know it's a whole different area, but either way, I wish I wouldn't have waited. It's going to be uncomfortable for him either way, but at least when he's little youll be able to hold and comfort him afterward, once older he'll be more independent and will likely pick at it. Just my 2 cents.

And no matter you're reasoning, do what you and hubby have decided to do together, you don't have to explain yourself or your beliefs to anyone.
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Old 11-16-2011, 12:09 PM   #15
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Re: Circ'ing a 4 month old - pros/cons?

I'd ask the pediatrician which one he would choose. It seems like at 6 months it'd be easier to keep him from messing with it than a year.
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Old 11-16-2011, 12:22 PM   #16
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Re: Circ'ing a 4 month old - pros/cons?

DS had his done when he was around 5 months actual. His was due to medical necessity but for some crazy reason they didn't do it during the 4 months he was in the NICU So he had it done as an outpatient. I made DH take him b/c even though they were claiming medical necessity...i think it was more of a CYA in case this things goes south. But it was horrible. DS needed what the urologist called an "aggressive" circ so he did have general...well actually i think they gave him a spinal. You won't be able to feed him for 12 hours prior to the procedure. And they kept bumping ds surgery time back so dh had to sit there with a screaming starving infant for several hours more than originally anticipated. He had an iv. And then you had to have a second adult come with for the ride home to supervise the infant in the car seat (i guess it is possible that they could be drowsy enough that their head could fall forward and block off their airway...pretty unlikely imo, but they required it or the wanted to admit ds for monitored recovery.

And when he came home his diaper was SOAKED in blood. More blood than I would think a tiny preemie could lose and still be ok. I FREAKED out. And it looked so AWFUL and raw and painful. I felt like a horrible mother to let them do this to my son. I still feel awful about it. And then pulling off they scab...was traumatic too.

I am not trying to scare you. It was just a traumatic experience for us. And my ds was right around the age of your ds so I though I would share. Hugs to you...i hope things are smoother for you guys.
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Old 11-16-2011, 12:30 PM   #17
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Re: Circ'ing a 4 month old - pros/cons?

Quote:
Originally Posted by mama.timms View Post
I'm going to talk to DH tonight about waiting until he's older. I know DH wants it done now... he thinks it will hurt worse, the older he gets. But the points made about pain management are great ones!
Yes, they are.

Quote:
Originally Posted by mama.timms View Post
I just wish we had had it done at birth. I wish the hospital hadn't changed their policy, about allowing parents to stay with their babies during the procedure. But wishful thinking is useless in this case, I suppose.
Maybe there is a reason for him not being able to have it done at birth. More time to think about it and determine if you are sure about your decision.

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Originally Posted by MDever View Post
Follow your Mama heart.
I agree.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MDever View Post
I understand that he feels very strongly about this issue.

I am not religious personally so I am curious about his convictions.
I read/hear about this often. I understood that in Christianity, Islam, and Judaism man was created by God in his image. I understand that Jewish and Muslim people circ for religious reasons as well. I am truly curious why and where the religious conviction comes from? I would love to understand better.

I understand VERY well what a challenge this can be in a marriage. When we became pregnant w/ DS I was very adament about leaving him intact. It did put a strain on our relationship. Now 8 years later I am very glad that I stood my ground. DH has even come to me and thanked me for pushing the issue.
I am interested in the bolded also. And for the last paragraph, Dh and I didn't agree either. I gathered all the info and he just looked past it. I told him that I would not circ and if he was as adament to circ as I was to not, then he would have to get the info/research and convince me. He couldn't, so little man is intact. He still thinks he should be circ'd, but I will leave that up to DS to decide when he can make the decision.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Janine View Post
We kept DS intact on my insistence and DH was not happy about it, which he would mention periodically after DS was born. I finally called his bluff by calling up some circ doctors locally to enquire about having it done. In my limited experience, it was difficult finding a doctor even willing to do it at my sons age (3 months old at the time). I called several doctors who said 2 months was their cut off. Which was fine with me since I wasn't going to let it happen anyways. But then again circ'ing is very uncommon where I live. So maybe it is different elsewhere.
Same here. He will probably always say something about it.
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Old 11-16-2011, 12:32 PM   #18
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Re: Circ'ing a 4 month old - pros/cons?

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Originally Posted by kristinc View Post
DS had his done when he was around 5 months actual. His was due to medical necessity but for some crazy reason they didn't do it during the 4 months he was in the NICU So he had it done as an outpatient. I made DH take him b/c even though they were claiming medical necessity...i think it was more of a CYA in case this things goes south. But it was horrible. DS needed what the urologist called an "aggressive" circ so he did have general...well actually i think they gave him a spinal. You won't be able to feed him for 12 hours prior to the procedure. And they kept bumping ds surgery time back so dh had to sit there with a screaming starving infant for several hours more than originally anticipated. He had an iv. And then you had to have a second adult come with for the ride home to supervise the infant in the car seat (i guess it is possible that they could be drowsy enough that their head could fall forward and block off their airway...pretty unlikely imo, but they required it or the wanted to admit ds for monitored recovery.

And when he came home his diaper was SOAKED in blood. More blood than I would think a tiny preemie could lose and still be ok. I FREAKED out. And it looked so AWFUL and raw and painful. I felt like a horrible mother to let them do this to my son. I still feel awful about it. And then pulling off they scab...was traumatic too.

I am not trying to scare you. It was just a traumatic experience for us. And my ds was right around the age of your ds so I though I would share. Hugs to you...i hope things are smoother for you guys.
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Old 11-16-2011, 12:37 PM   #19
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I would wait til general can be used and additional pain meds can be given besides Tylenol.. It's gonna hurt no matter what it's a sensitive part of the body.. So I would go with whenever the best pain med option is available!
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Old 11-16-2011, 12:52 PM   #20
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My son was circ'd yesterday. The pediatric urologist had us wait until he was 6 months so he could be put under general anesthesia. They gave us Tylenol with hydrocodone (sp?), but we've only been using regular Tylenol. He is fussier than normal, but does not seem to be in pain. I didn't even need to give him any Tylenol overnight. He cries when he has a wet diaper, but he did that before the circ too. Feel free to ask any questions!

ETA: In contrast to a previous post, I could BF him up to 4 hrs before the surgery. He also hasn't had any bleeding. We've been using an antibiotic ointment with fleece liners since we got home.

Last edited by loonyluna; 11-16-2011 at 12:57 PM.
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