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Old 11-17-2011, 10:24 AM   #151
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Re: Circumcision has profoundly affected every member of my family...

OP I wanted to offer you because I could have easily been in your shoes! I did absolutely zero research before our oldest was born(partly because I figured I'd have all girls like the rest of my family, we see how that worked out!) and I differed to DH. I figured, I don't have a penis, what do I know? I didn't really feel settled over the prospect of having surgery done on my brand new baby, so I was a little relieved that DH said he wasn't attached one way or the other. I let him know I was a bit traumatized over babysitting our nephew who had an infected plastibel, and he understood. He said he would defer to the doctor and we would get all the facts before we would consent. We were both still expecting to have a girl even though we were officially team green... When our son was born our ped(who is a God send! He was the on call, not the one we selected, he was wonderful, we switched to him and it has been such a blessing!) didn't even offer circ. DH asked him if we should and he flat out said there was no medical reason, it was purely cosmetic and he did NOT recommend it! All that from an older American doctor! I had no idea at the time how unusual that was. I have done my research in the meantime and I absolutely am horrified that I would have let that happen to my son if a different doctor had been on call the day he was born! I feel so ashamed of my self knowing I was not willing to stand up for my newborn all because I had not bothered to research.

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Old 11-17-2011, 10:25 AM   #152
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Originally Posted by Stamina

As someone who has lost a baby to miscarriage, I'm repulsed that anyone could support a comparison of mourning the loss of a healthy, living child's foreskin to mourning the loss of a child's life.
Agreed! My son wouldn't be able to pee if he hadn't got his. My boys have a unexplained medical condition that they go through phases that their urine literally burns their skin to the point DS1's foreskin swelled so much it pinched his urethra. Not telling everyone to go out and do it but I'm disgusted by anyone that compares circ to miscarriage or calls me a horrible mother for circing my boys. Yes I have had someone directly call me an abusive mother even knowing it was medically necessary.

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Old 11-17-2011, 10:28 AM   #153
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Re: Circumcision has profoundly affected every member of my family...

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Old 11-17-2011, 10:28 AM   #154
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Re: Circumcision has profoundly affected every member of my family...

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Originally Posted by monkeybunns View Post
Agreed! My son wouldn't be able to pee if he hadn't got his. My boys have a unexplained medical condition that they go through phases that their urine literally burns their skin to the point DS1's foreskin swelled so much it pinched his urethra. Not telling everyone to go out and do it but I'm disgusted by anyone that compares circ to miscarriage or calls me a horrible mother for circing my boys. Yes I have had someone directly call me an abusive mother even knowing it was medically necessary.

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I have never heard of this condition. What is it called? Why does it make the foreskin swell, but not the urethra? Was there ever a culture swab done to see if any bacteria or yeast were growing? Not challenging you, just want to learn more.
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Old 11-17-2011, 10:29 AM   #155
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Re: Circumcision has profoundly affected every member of my family...

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Originally Posted by Stamina View Post
As someone who has lost a baby to miscarriage, I'm repulsed that anyone could support a comparison of mourning the loss of a healthy, living child's foreskin to mourning the loss of a child's life.
I have lost a baby too and you are missing the point. The point is this mother asked for SUPPORT for a traumatic event in her life and all the "well MY son didn't have any issues" posts are no different than telling a mother who has lost a child "well MY pregnancy went just fine".

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Old 11-17-2011, 10:30 AM   #156
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Re: Circumcision has profoundly affected every member of my family...

Thanks for sharing your story, many hugs to you in your journey. I have 2 intact boys because of posts like yours that prompted me to learn more.
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Old 11-17-2011, 10:31 AM   #157
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Re: Circumcision has profoundly affected every member of my family...

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Originally Posted by Joyful Tie Dyes View Post
I have lost a baby too and you are missing the point. The point is this mother asked for SUPPORT for a traumatic event in her life and all the "well MY son didn't have any issues" posts are no different than telling a mother who has lost a child "well MY pregnancy went just fine".
Blunt, emotional, comparisons don't work well with most women. I've had 3 m/c and understand your point perfectly.
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Old 11-17-2011, 10:34 AM   #158
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I have had several miscarriages and I do appreciate the comparison because both involve grief and guilt. Please ladies, let's get this back on track.
mama! I have had several m/cs too!

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Old 11-17-2011, 10:36 AM   #159
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Re: Circumcision has profoundly affected every member of my family...

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Originally Posted by Stamina View Post
As someone who has lost a baby to miscarriage, I'm repulsed that anyone could support a comparison of mourning the loss of a healthy, living child's foreskin to mourning the loss of a child's life.
I've had more than one miscarriage. I still stand by my statement. It wasn't about what happened, it was about how people are acting in this thread when support was being asked for.
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Old 11-17-2011, 10:37 AM   #160
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Re: Circumcision has profoundly affected every member of my family...

If you are going to compare circ to miscarriage, then do it completely. In this case, a mother posting about her traumatic miscarriage would also post, "I can't believe I allowed myself to ever get pregnant! I will never, ever get pregnant again!" What would the proper way to support this attitude be?
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