here is my situation. about 8-9 months ago, after 3 years of a horrid relationship that i was convinced i could fix, my kids father left. i have a 2.5 yo dd, and a 15 month old ds. they love there father very much. but he has never been a part of their life. even when he lived here, i couldnt work, because he said that when he gets off of work he doesnt need to be a "babysitter" he wants to relax. when the kids were little and i would wake up at night to nurse, i would turn the lamp on and he would swear at me and tell me that he has to work so i need to respect that... and after 3 years of drug addiction, verbal and physical abuse i had enough.... so long story short he feels bad now, he wants to "fix things" i honestly dont think it is possible and i dont even want to try. about a month after he left, i met the most amazing man, and we took things pretty slow. well now summer is over, and i discussed with him becoming a permanent part of my life, and that included meeting my kids. he has never been around kids much less even spoken to one before, so it was very new to him. he stayed at my house a few weekends and warmed up to them. and the next week he moved in after seeing how i struggle daily with 2 little ones and the terrible twos, they rarely see their father because he "doesnt have the time", i have yet to recieve child support. so E is the only one besides myself doing any parenting, even though i told him that he doesnt have to take any parental responsibility. he has taken over the role of "dad" i cannot say that im not happy that my kids will have a dad. because their father wants nothing to do with them unless it is using them to control me. my dilemma lies in what do i do if they start calling him "dad".... should i be ok with it?