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Old 12-04-2011, 04:46 PM   #21
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Re: I feel like a failure this time, update in post #18

Laura - I did have my thyroid checked at one of my appointments. It came back normal. Thanks for the info, I'll keep that in mind.

I really don't know what to do about these feelings of failing. I don't know how I'll ever get over them. It's a struggle everyday.

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Old 12-12-2011, 10:49 AM   #22
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Re: I feel like a failure this time, update in post #18

I have 2 1/2 year old boy/girl twins and I can tell you I was soooo tired all the time in the beginning with them that I was not functioning like my normal self. I really hope you are managing okay. Keep us updated
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Old 12-12-2011, 03:26 PM   #23
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Re: I feel like a failure this time, update in post #18

Try not to stress mama, just remember TONS of perfectly healthy, smart, amazing people were formula fed! They will be amazing with or without breast milk, just do what works for you and your babies. Also wanted to share that I have a friend who had an amazingly stressful first couple months as a mommy and was SO determined to breastfeed but it was just plain too much, so she stopped. When things finally settled down and baby calmed down a bit (and finally slept) a couple months later, she was actually able to relactate with the help of our lactation specialist at work. I'm not 100% clear how she did it (I know taking domperidone was one thing she did) but I bet there's a lot of info out there about it (I assume she did the same thing that adoptive moms that start lactating do). She ended up exclusively pumping until her sweet little girl turned 1 year old. Hang in there mama, you're doing a great job!
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Old 12-13-2011, 06:21 AM   #24
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Re: I feel like a failure this time, update in post #18

DH was fully on formula... I was on formula after 6 weeks except for at night. We both turned out okay. Also, DH is technically a genius, based on IQ scores.
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Old 12-14-2011, 08:57 AM   #25
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Re: I feel like a failure this time, update in post #18

have you considered human milk banks? that would give you the ability to give your babes human milk if formula feeding really bothers you...http://www.hmbana.org/
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Old 12-15-2011, 01:50 PM   #26
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Re: I feel like a failure this time, update in post #18

I am able to BF some now, not enough for either to be exclusively, but at least I can give them a little bit. It's really nice when they are fussy; it puts them right to sleep. I'm taking a bunch of herbs, eating oatmeal, drinking tons of water, and BFing as often as I can.

The babies are starting to smile & laugh, which is so adorable. I feel more bonded to DS than to DD. I'm sure it'll come in time. They are just about 2 months old now.

Therapy is really helping with my issues. The meds are working too. I'm sill not at 100%, but at least I have some hope for the future now.
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Old 12-16-2011, 07:01 AM   #27
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Re: I feel like a failure this time, update in post #18

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I am able to BF some now, not enough for either to be exclusively, but at least I can give them a little bit. It's really nice when they are fussy; it puts them right to sleep. I'm taking a bunch of herbs, eating oatmeal, drinking tons of water, and BFing as often as I can.

The babies are starting to smile & laugh, which is so adorable. I feel more bonded to DS than to DD. I'm sure it'll come in time. They are just about 2 months old now.

Therapy is really helping with my issues. The meds are working too. I'm sill not at 100%, but at least I have some hope for the future now.
I'm sooo happy for you that you can at least bf enough to soothe them! I bet that makes a world of difference for you! that's so awesome.
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Old 12-17-2011, 08:38 PM   #28
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Re: I feel like a failure this time, update in post #18

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I'm sooo happy for you that you can at least bf enough to soothe them! I bet that makes a world of difference for you! that's so awesome.
Thank you! It really makes me feel happy & useful, which may sound weird, but it's how I feel.
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Old 12-17-2011, 09:24 PM   #29
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Re: I feel like a failure this time, update in post #18

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Thank you! It really makes me feel happy & useful, which may sound weird, but it's how I feel.
crashing just to commiserate on the feelings of failure in not being able to bf. i have a different situation in that dd is my only so i don't even know if i have working plumbing, she has SN and i was sick after she was born, a lot of different factors lead me to have minimal supply and dd was never physically able to nurse anyway. i know that feeling of a punch in the gut when i see someone nursing their baby. dd is nearly 4 and its gotten much better. i did all i could and it wasn't in the cards. when dd was in the nicu i pumped my brains out every 2 hours round the clock and it was AWFUL but even if i only got a few oz a day it made me feel better to contribute even that small amount, that i had control over SOMETHING. something is better than nothing! i kept telling myself that anyway LOL! it is really awesome that you are able to comfort your los by breastfeeding. that really must be an amazing feeling. no one else can do that for them mama only you. you are their whole world right now.

i'm glad things are looking up for you!
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