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Old 03-01-2012, 10:05 AM   #1
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Sitting on the toilet for an 1.5 hours?!

My mom is visiting and watching my DD at home. Normally DD comes to work with me so I'm really struggling right now.

My mom decided to potty train her. Today is day 3. Day 1 she had all accidents, day 2 all accidents and this morning my mom had her on there from the time she woke up (she woke up dry) until 1.5 hours later when she finally peed. Now she put her on there again (it's been an hour since the pee) and she's been on for another 30 minutes! Is this normal and ok? DD will hold her pee until she gets off and then go in her panties.

I work as a nanny and when my mom leaves I can't keep up the sitting on the potty and entertaining her for an hour.

Any advice and insight would be great. She will be 3 in May and wakes up dry most nights. She's amazing at communicating and will tell me when she pees and poops in her diaper.

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Old 03-01-2012, 10:12 AM   #2
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Re: Sitting on the toilet for an 1.5 hours?!

I think this is really going to hurt the whole potty training process - spending an hour on the toilet sounds very negative to me and if DD associates potty training with negativity then she's not going to do it.
Honestly, kids will potty train when they are ready - it is NOT something to force. I tried and tried with DD1 and she didn't have anything of it but when she was 3 years and 4 months she woke up and decided she was done and potty trained herself in 3 days with no night-time accidents. With my DS I tried potty training a little bit here and there when he seemed interested but when he was 3 years and 4 months he woke up and decided he was done and potty trained himself in 4 days with no night-time accidents. So with DD2 I'm not even going to try! They'll do it when they're ready.
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Old 03-01-2012, 01:43 PM   #3
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Thanks :/. That was what I thought...

Now to get my mom to stop without making her cry :/
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Old 03-01-2012, 03:59 PM   #4
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Re: Sitting on the toilet for an 1.5 hours?!

IMO that would be very traumatizing to ME to have to sit on the potty that long. LOL! In all the potty training things I've read, it has said to never force them to get on or stay on the potty, ever, because like PP they see that as a negative thing and you want potty training to be a very positive experience.
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Old 03-01-2012, 04:15 PM   #5
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Re: Sitting on the toilet for an 1.5 hours?!

I think that would be very traumatizing. A kid will learn to potty training in their own time. We do scheduled potty breaks, but we only ask DD to sit on the potty for a few minutes at a time. Sometimes she wants to keep sitting until we finish reading her a story, which is fine, but then we get her up and try again in a little while. I think forcing a kid to sit that long is certainly going to derail the process, if not lead to urinary retention and/or constipation...
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Old 03-01-2012, 04:16 PM   #6
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Re: Sitting on the toilet for an 1.5 hours?!

I think that would be very traumatizing. A kid will learn to potty training in their own time. We do scheduled potty breaks, but we only ask DD to sit on the potty for a few minutes at a time. Sometimes she wants to keep sitting until we finish reading her a story, which is fine, but then we get her up and try again in a little while. I think forcing a kid to sit that long is certainly going to derail the process, if not lead to urinary retention and/or constipation...
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Old 03-01-2012, 07:53 PM   #7
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I wouldn't force her to sit at all. DS also likes to sit and read sometimes, but that isn't the same as making him sit. You don't want potty training to become a control struggle, because ultimately it's her body and she will win (plus it just doesn't seem right). Good luck talking to your mom :/
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Old 03-01-2012, 07:57 PM   #8
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Re: Sitting on the toilet for an 1.5 hours?!

That is FAR too long for a LO to be sitting on the potty! I have to be honest I would be beyond furious if someone did that to one of my children. I am a bid advocate of frequent reminders using a timer but sitting?? That is awful and implies that going potty is a punishment. I hope you are able to work this out with your mom without her feelings getting hurt
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Old 03-01-2012, 08:00 PM   #9
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I think it would be traumatizing. I think more than 5-10 is excess, especially starting out.
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Old 03-15-2012, 06:52 PM   #10
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Re: Sitting on the toilet for an 1.5 hours?!

I don't think it would be traumatizing (if your kid isn't bawling and crying, then they're going to be okay, imho). It IS something that used to be done-- my MIL used to have my husband sit on the potty for long stretches-- and the current generation isn't conclusively all screwed up because of past potty training practices! Sitting is not inherently punitive, imho.

With my son, we'd sit until he was ready to get up. My husband would go through picture books identifying the objects and making sounds/ actions for each one-- my son would be fine sitting on the potty for 30-45 minutes spending time with his dad. Even now, sometimes he'll just hang out sitting on the potty looking at books. I just don't see this as a negative thing any more than I'd see sitting on the couch looking at books, etc a negative thing.

So, to me, it's only a bad thing if the child actually dislikes the time. The time span alone isn't enough.
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