Reply Hey Mom! Learn more about the Gerber Life Insurance Grow-Up Plan!
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 04-11-2012, 07:46 PM   #1
TalkinBoutMyGirl's Avatar
TalkinBoutMyGirl
~Love~
sitesupporter
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Hogwarts
Posts: 13,178
My Mood:
I'm having an absolutely breakdown :(

I just got a job an hour away and I started last Monday (the second). I worked Monday and Tuesday and then had my CPST training in my town Wed-Fri so I was only commuting out of town for 2 days last week. DD has spent the past 2 nights at my moms, tonight being her 3rd in a row. I just can't take it I am NEVER home. Between when I get home and when I need to be in bed is 3 hours. So I basically grab DD, do the evening ritual (play for a bit, dinner, bath), try to squeeze in stuff that I need to do for me or the house, and then I send her back to my moms. I haven't had her stay with me overnight because I think its unfair for me to have to drag her out of the house before the sun comes up. If I do that it also means my mom has to get up super early. I'm pretty much "taking one for the team" and sending her on to my moms every night. But tonight I just lost it when it was time to tell her goodbye. I burst into tears in front of DD which I hate doing but I didn't want to let her go. I am so so so afraid something bad is going to happen to her while I am gone. I don't even know where she is most of the day and that drives me insane. She's with my mom, I know she is safe. I know my mom uses the car seat right and isn't going to put my DD in danger but I absolutely cannot stand not knowing exactly where she is at all times. DD asked why I was crying and I told her because I missed her so much since I was working all the time now. Then she said "I promise I'll come back" I then had to explain to her that this wasn't her fault. She is so sweet but I hate that she see's how upset I am. The commuting is only temporary as I am signing a lease on a house tomorrow with a tentative move in date around the 1st but I am gonna lose my mind in that time. 3 more weeks of this before we can move...I just can't take it! To top it off there is no guarantee DD will actually move with me at that time either. My mother is helping my grandmother move so she still needs to spend a lot of her time in my hometown so if my mom isn't ready to move too then DD's homebase will still be in my hometown

Thanks for reading..I just needed to get this out.

Advertisement

__________________
Anna - Gazelle intense with mywife Rachel and Hailey (6) our little
Swag with Me!
TalkinBoutMyGirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-11-2012, 09:04 PM   #2
betsybikes's Avatar
betsybikes
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 962
My Mood:
Hugs! Hang in there. At least you know it is temporary. And thank goodness for your supportive mom!
__________________
Mama to three littles. DS1 W born 05/07, DD R born 07/11 and new little bundle DS2 J born 11/13

My mixed lot listed here:
http://www.diaperswappers.com/forum/...1#post17149541
betsybikes is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-11-2012, 09:40 PM   #3
wlillie
Banned
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 4,179
My Mood:
Re: I'm having an absolutely breakdown :(

wlillie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-11-2012, 10:34 PM   #4
LegendaryMom's Avatar
LegendaryMom
Registered
seller
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 13
My Mood:
Smile Re: I'm having an absolutely breakdown :(

So sorry you have to be away from your daughter. I know exactly how it feels to miss your child and want to be there every second of the day. Just know you are also doing something good for her by providing for her, even though it is emotionally difficult. Stay strong, and know that you two will be together soon.
LegendaryMom is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-12-2012, 03:48 AM   #5
carriek38's Avatar
carriek38
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Ponyville
Posts: 9,267
Re: I'm having an absolutely breakdown :(

Of course you'll make it through the next three weeks. And the three weeks after that, and the three weeks after that. Yes, it sucks...like, royally SUCKS to spend that much time away from the most important thing in your life. But overall these are GOOD changes in your life. They move you forward professionally, giving you more opportunities now and in the future. You knowingly made these changes and sacrifices to give you and your daughter a BETTER life...and you are! From all your other posts, your DD sounds lovely--happy, astute, articulate, etc. Of course she understands that something's up...but at the same time, my niece, who is about the same age as your DD, is capable of understanding why her Daddy is gone for a week or two at a time (he's been doing quite a bit of traveling for work); I'm sure your DD understands, too. And honestly, it kind of sounds like she sees this as being about her (which is age-appropriate)--that you miss her b/c she's going off on an adventure to Grandma's house & don't worry, she'll come back. You're not scarring her, you're not neglecting her. She is surrounded by parents and caregivers who cherish her, and you're making some tough choices right now in order for both of you to have more enriched lives in the long run...that's the RIGHT choice. And the fear? That's either A.) normal but completely irrational b/c you're a mom, or B.) indicative of some Type A personality stuff that you might want to work on before starting a child welfare job...or you'll be by the end of your probationary period . Take care of yourself & that little girl as much as possible--you're going to make it through this!
__________________
Carrie. Wifey to F, Mama to Baby Bear, Nugget, and Teeny.
carriek38 is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 04-12-2012, 05:26 AM   #6
EveryDayIsANewDay's Avatar
EveryDayIsANewDay
Registered Users
Formerly: Stacey***ke3
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 3,908
Re: I'm having an absolutely breakdown :(

Quote:
Originally Posted by carriek38 View Post
Of course you'll make it through the next three weeks. And the three weeks after that, and the three weeks after that. Yes, it sucks...like, royally SUCKS to spend that much time away from the most important thing in your life. But overall these are GOOD changes in your life. They move you forward professionally, giving you more opportunities now and in the future. You knowingly made these changes and sacrifices to give you and your daughter a BETTER life...and you are! From all your other posts, your DD sounds lovely--happy, astute, articulate, etc. Of course she understands that something's up...but at the same time, my niece, who is about the same age as your DD, is capable of understanding why her Daddy is gone for a week or two at a time (he's been doing quite a bit of traveling for work); I'm sure your DD understands, too. And honestly, it kind of sounds like she sees this as being about her (which is age-appropriate)--that you miss her b/c she's going off on an adventure to Grandma's house & don't worry, she'll come back. You're not scarring her, you're not neglecting her. She is surrounded by parents and caregivers who cherish her, and you're making some tough choices right now in order for both of you to have more enriched lives in the long run...that's the RIGHT choice. And the fear? That's either A.) normal but completely irrational b/c you're a mom, or B.) indicative of some Type A personality stuff that you might want to work on before starting a child welfare job...or you'll be by the end of your probationary period . Take care of yourself & that little girl as much as possible--you're going to make it through this!
LOVE your supportive post!! I second all of this.

Last week my mom went out of town with my oldest for a week, I worked 6 of 7 nights (til midnight), youngest (2.5) spent every night at a babysitters. It was nervewrecking but we made it through it. My kids lived a lot with daddy deployed, they just know it's normal to be without a parent, sad to say. You are doing what is best for you and your DD. Don't think you are failing her. Sounds like she is handling it well which is a GREAT thing!
EveryDayIsANewDay is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-13-2012, 06:18 PM   #7
luvsviola's Avatar
luvsviola
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Central Indiana
Posts: 17,103
My Mood:
Re: I'm having an absolutely breakdown :(

No advice. Just hugs mama.
__________________
Kristen
Middle school teacher by day, super mom by night
Mommy to The Boss~2007, The Energizer Bunny~2009, and The Princess~2011
My kids are no longer in diapers, but somehow, my computer keeps finding its way back here...
luvsviola is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-13-2012, 08:00 PM   #8
TalkinBoutMyGirl's Avatar
TalkinBoutMyGirl
~Love~
sitesupporter
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Hogwarts
Posts: 13,178
My Mood:
Re: I'm having an absolutely breakdown :(

Sorry I couldn't make it back to this until now. Thanks for all the support. I ended up not going to work Thursday because after bawling Wednesday night I had the worst headache ever. I was nauseous and had the chills so I just stayed home. I got to see DD more which was awesome

I feel much better today. I talked to my mom yesterday and told her I couldn't handle her flakiness and to me it sounded like she didn't want to move with us anymore. She reassured me that that wasn't the case and she would still do whatever had to be done. It made me feel a lot better! I signed the lease today on my new place and the landlord is awesome. He is a sweet old man who said he would watch out for "us ladies" lol Anyway, thanks again for the all the kind words!
__________________
Anna - Gazelle intense with mywife Rachel and Hailey (6) our little
Swag with Me!
TalkinBoutMyGirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Copyright 2005 - 2014 Escalate Media. All Rights Reserved.