Had the circumcision talk with DF!!

[Fleece Be With You]

The plastibell almost killed my DS, there is absolutely cutting involved. He bled slowly for several hours (we both fell asleep for a nap after we got home), ending in an emergency transfusion and surgery. So yeah, do not get the plastibell if you do circ!

[RainandRedemption]

That's great! My dh was pro circ before I started bringing it up, but the truth is that he had never thought about it before at all! When we were discussing it I told him I had several good reasons against it, and if he wanted it done he needed to look into it and find some good reasons for it. There wasn't a fight with us or anything, dh was receptive when I brought it up, and I felt very strongly. After looking it he decided he didn't want to circ either.

GL!

eta omgoodnes that plastibell thing sounds horrible

[kushie tushie]

Congrats OP!
I have a friend who just had a baby and they decided not to circ. I was really happy the nurses at the hossy were honest with them. She didnt want to and he did. The nurses explained that its cosmetic and harmful and he changed his mind.

My DH wanted DS circed at first too. Then once he started researching he changed his mind. Now hes very anti circ and thankful I was so persistant we dont circ DS!

Amanda . Blaming my phone for typos and crap.

[pcjs]

Originally Posted by wlillie My dh and I have watched the videos and done the research and we still circ. If you really don't want him circed you should use logic and not emotion if your dh is like most men.

How many threads do we need regarding the same issue over and over again just for the attention and trying to keep it alive. If someone wants to research it, they can look at the hundreds of prior threads. If you don't want to circ., don't... why be so dramatic over something so minor in the grand scheme of things. You aren't going to compromise if you have it in your head you don't want to, so just tell your husband its not happening and be done with it. Sorry, not trying to be harsh, but the rounds and rounds of justifying why or why not get old. (then again, its a good distraction from folding laundry).

[burnsis]

good for you OP, keep working on him!

and yes, all of the methods including plastibell, involve cutting off functioning parts from a non consenting person, one without a voice. I've researched all methods in detail, even though it's never been something we would consider for our sons. I have never been able to stomach watching a video though, just seeing still photos of the baby strapped down are enough to make me want to vomit.

anyways, kudos to you again OP your son will thank you later

[alyssa&rylan's-mommy]

I'm glad he's willing to at least think it over! I'm so glad my hubby is just as strongly against it as I am (for our children)

[el's mama]

I say use logic along with a good dose of ego boosting. Here's a link I found helpful.
http://www.circumstitions.com/men-vuln.html (written by an intact man).


What I've seen that I really don't like among some intactivists is the lack of respect for how circumcised men feel about their penis. Here we are trying to defend our sons and realizing how very important their intact penis is, and yet we will turn around and completely disregard how our husband feels about his circumcised penis? He was circumcised without consent...the very thing we're trying to protect our sons from, but we should also be considerate and understanding if they feel defensive.

OP: I'm so glad your DF didn't immediately shut down the idea. It's great that he asked a question rather than shutting down or getting angry. I've heard that the Penn and Teller video is a good one for guys but I've only watched part of it so far.

[crunchymom2b]

Originally Posted by pcjs How many threads do we need regarding the same issue over and over again just for the attention and trying to keep it alive. If someone wants to research it, they can look at the hundreds of prior threads. If you don't want to circ., don't... why be so dramatic over something so minor in the grand scheme of things. You aren't going to compromise if you have it in your head you don't want to, so just tell your husband its not happening and be done with it. Sorry, not trying to be harsh, but the rounds and rounds of justifying why or why not get old. (then again, its a good distraction from folding laundry).

Whoa. I fully intend to compromise (well as much as you can in this type of situation). I have no problems with circumcision, I do not regret DS having it done. I am having a hard time agreeing to this procedure knowing it is mainly cosmetic and if something were to go wrong I couldn't live with myself. We are already having to dealwith some issues that will arise after birth, I don't want to add this to the list.

I was NOT posting to start a debate. I was excited that my normally mainstream and un-compromising DF actally heard me out and agreed to think about such a hot topic. I do want him to watch the video before I agree to the procedure because I want him to know exactly what happens during it. Right now he really doesn't have a clue. Its just what you do around here sadly. Could we end up circing? Possibly. But at least now its open for discussion!

[AnimalHouse]

How exactly does one compromise on the issue of circumcision? Either you do it, or not. Is there any middle ground there? Not trying to be snarky or start a debate... but I've heard the "I will compromise" bit many times on circ threads, and never understood it.

[pcjs]

Originally Posted by AnimalHouse How exactly does one compromise on the issue of circumcision? Either you do it, or not. Is there any middle ground there? Not trying to be snarky or start a debate... but I've heard the "I will compromise" bit many times on circ threads, and never understood it.

Exactly. You don't. Poster doesn't want to do it, so she shouldn't. Either you do it or not. If you don't want it done, don't do it. I don't get all the drama and making it a big deal.