Foster Parenting - Any tips, input, advice??

[BatesMama12]

Hey everyone! My dh and I have been praying for God to bless us with more children one way or another. Well right now I am dealing with health issues (PCOS, uterine scarring, and awaiting my tubal reversal next week) that are making it a long road ahead. We have always wanted to adopt but they make it so expensive and hard for anyone with children already. So all of a sudden someone we know approached us about fostering. Its something we considered breifly before but didn't really have the space or the lifestyle suitable (I was working fulltime and dh works an awful rotating schedule) to feel like we would be doing any good. Well, our new house offers tons of extra space, and allows me to be a full time mom (my DREAM job)! So we have sent in info requests to a couple of places, but I'm pretty much clueless about how it all works. How often is adoption possible? Can you turn away children that may clash with your current family (not to be mean, but we have all little boys and i'm not sure that boy/girl could share rooms, etc ) Do children often arrive with nothing at all of their own? Do they receive clothing allowances? Do you just keep around a bunch of stuff for any age/size/gender? Please someone help all of my silly questions!

[BatesMama12]

Also, we are young(er) parents and i'm not sure how well having teens would go?

[newmommy13]

Welcome! First of all, so many answers depend on your county. There i a big variety! I live in WI and my county has no specific foster adopt program and is inclined towards reuniting and giving bio parents a while to clean up their act. Now across the state there is a county taking lots of newborns at birth due to past or current cases. That wouldnt happen in my county, a new baby would probably go home ith mom until there is a case with that child. Its just different cps/dcfs philosophies.

You always have the option of turning down a placement. We are licensed for 0-2 so we wont get calls about teens but if we get a call about a baby who migjt not be a good fit for us we would just decline. You have to look out for your existing family first, kwim? You could definitely specify gender as well, or your living sitution might dictatate that as well. For us our dd's room is the only one besides ours so we can only take a little girl which is fine by me!

Different people do clothes differently too. Here you get a small allownce for things lik winter coats and hoes and stuff. Ome people keep a range of clothing sizes but i have a lot from dd and wont go shopping until we get a placement (as much as it kills me lol) for anything i need because i dont know the exact age/size. Our preplacement trainer recommended having a few sleepers on hand in case of a late night placement. Most kid just come ith the clothes on their back and they might not be clean or appropriate for weather/size etc.

Hth! If you have any more questions ask away!

[medireh09]

We are medically fragile foster parents. We've adopted one child. I think it really depends a lot on where you are located and the policies of your agency. I know that here, there are a lot of newborns coming into care. However, there is emphasis on finding suitable relative placements, so a lot of newborns spend a few months in care and go on to live with family members. We are licensed for under 2 years. We have the option to turn down any placement that does not work for our family, and we are pretty inflexible about what is and is not okay for us to take. We foster through the local DCBS office. They are very respectful about our placement requirements and have not called us about children out of our age range. We choose to keep a supply of clothing in each gender for sizes newborn through 18 months so that we don't have to scramble for clothing if a placement comes unexpectedly (which doesn't happen for us because we take medical needs kiddos/preemies and they usually notify us about the child a week or more before they leave the hospital).