Polyamory and TTC...

[Almacham]

Originally Posted by Sageac Things are going well here, thanks for asking. I'm at 18 weeks and waiting impatiently for this baby (for the pregnancy to be over). I'm not getting to see SO very often and It;s wearing on me emotionally, since he misses me so much as well. (finances keep me here, and custody issues are keeping him there for now. DH is working a lot, but when he's home he's very supportive. I miss him a lot lately as well, since he drives a truck and is pretty much gone from thursday to tuesday. The boys are doing well, and the baby is getting excited about the new baby. I am starting to, but since i wasn't really ready to have this baby its harder for me to get excited about it yet. I'm working on my stash tho, which is helping.

Glad to hear that you're doing well! Things are going well here, too.

[mommyto3beautifulbabes]

I think that your timeline sounds great. I see that you are pg, so I am guessing that this is an old post (yep just looked it's from Feb). I am not poly or in a relationship where I could be I am a very jealous person. However I love that others can make this work and have the families that they dream of. More power to you momma and thanks for sharing your story. I hope that all continues to go well for you.

[mommyto3beautifulbabes]

I think that your timeline sounds great. I see that you are pg, so I am guessing that this is an old post (yep just looked it's from Feb). I am not poly or in a relationship where I could be I am a very jealous person. However I love that others can make this work and have the families that they dream of. More power to you momma and thanks for sharing your story. I hope that all continues to go well for you.

[PresqueNoire]

DH and I are not poly, but I recently became friends with a polygamous family (two wives, one husband). They have four kids total--both wives have older daughters and BF'ing sons, with one of the daughters from a prior marriage.

I can only imagine trying to balance when you TTC with both your SO and DH. You're lucky to be able to have SO be so involved without any friction with DH, especially about when to have more children. I hope it all works out! If you don't mind me asking, do you not share your lifestyle with IL's out of fear of judgment, or is it simply because it's not their business?

[Sageac]

I would say a little of both. we have alluded to a poly-mindset with them in preparation, but only in the way that DH might have other relationships at some point. The know nothing of my SO. I don't know if they will ever know about our relationships... mostly due to a "none o fhtier business" attitude.

I know I am lucky to have two men in my life that love and care about me, and I am especially grateful for my DH who is wonderful and supportive and the perfect balance for me as a "life partner."

New conflict is that there are rumours going around in SO's social circle that this baby *is* his and that's leading to more conflict than I would like with DH. (Especially since SO and I have not had interactions that could possibly lead to a pregnancy in 5 years... lol.) I did visit SO on his Bday (02/27) but was already 2.5 weeks along at that point so even if we *had* BD'd it could not have been his, but people will talk anyway so we might end up doing a DNA culture just to have on hand (since SO is still dragging through a nasty divorce). DH and I are really grateful to have such a wonderful history of communication, so the conflict between us was settled once I reassured him that there was not an option,and he knows better than to think I would lie to him (since Honesty is the fundamental element in a relationship where monogamy is not a rule).

Life is good and everyone is excited for us to be having a little girl.

[Xythnia]

"...Honesty is the fundamental element in a relationship where monogamy is not a rule"

This SHOULD be true for ANY type of relationship! Mono, Poly, M/s, etc.

Had a wonderful conversation with my DH over the poly concept in general. Your partners and yourself sound like very loving and mature adults, which we both think is beautiful and wonderful for the kiddos. Honestly, who can find fault with more LOVE in this world with the amount of HATE currently residing in it??

Blessings to you, your family and the DD in the oven!

[Almacham]

Originally Posted by Sageac I would say a little of both. we have alluded to a poly-mindset with them in preparation, but only in the way that DH might have other relationships at some point. The know nothing of my SO. I don't know if they will ever know about our relationships... mostly due to a "none o fhtier business" attitude. I know I am lucky to have two men in my life that love and care about me, and I am especially grateful for my DH who is wonderful and supportive and the perfect balance for me as a "life partner." New conflict is that there are rumours going around in SO's social circle that this baby *is* his and that's leading to more conflict than I would like with DH. (Especially since SO and I have not had interactions that could possibly lead to a pregnancy in 5 years... lol.) I did visit SO on his Bday (02/27) but was already 2.5 weeks along at that point so even if we *had* BD'd it could not have been his, but people will talk anyway so we might end up doing a DNA culture just to have on hand (since SO is still dragging through a nasty divorce). DH and I are really grateful to have such a wonderful history of communication, so the conflict between us was settled once I reassured him that there was not an option,and he knows better than to think I would lie to him (since Honesty is the fundamental element in a relationship where monogamy is not a rule). Life is good and everyone is excited for us to be having a little girl.

People make me sick sometimes! Ugh.

Congratulations on the baby girl, friend!

[Sageac]

Originally Posted by Xythnia "...Honesty is the fundamental element in a relationship where monogamy is not a rule" This SHOULD be true for ANY type of relationship! Mono, Poly, M/s, etc. Had a wonderful conversation with my DH over the poly concept in general. Your partners and yourself sound like very loving and mature adults, which we both think is beautiful and wonderful for the kiddos. Honestly, who can find fault with more LOVE in this world with the amount of HATE currently residing in it?? Blessings to you, your family and the DD in the oven!

Thanks! The first child I ever met that was living with more than one parent set put it pretty much how you did. She felt so lucky to have 3 people that love her every day, when most of her friends only had 1 parent. The word Poly-Amorous means "many loves" and that's just how we focus.

And thanks, we like any blessings and honor them all. Namaste.