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Old 06-01-2012, 03:52 AM   #1
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From SAHM to WOHM. Where did my friends go?

When I was a SAHM, I had a nice group of friends [some I would rather just call acquaintances ]. When I started going to school, I tried really hard to stay in touch with them. I was going to school, I had support from my friends, and people to vent to. Now that I work and go to school, during school semesters, I try to talk to them at least once a week. I've felt really distant from them. I get it, I can't spend all day just talking to them or get together with them. I feel really behind on everything. It hurts, but sometimes I wonder if it's just time to move on and find new friends that will understand where I am in my life versus telling me I'm so lucky I get a break from my daughter. I consider myself lucky to have a job and hope that things don't change, but there are days I'd rather be a SAHM because it's so much more fun staying home and playing with her. In fact, I wish I had done it more while I was a SAHM. I took things for granted then.

Anyway, do you find this happening to you? I think I'm just feeling a bit sad about working, especially since summer is coming up and this will be the first summer I work while my daughter is on summer break from school.

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Old 06-02-2012, 06:22 PM   #2
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Re: From SAHM to WOHM. Where did my friends go?

As moms, our kids become such a huge part of our lives that it is really hard to be friends with moms that dont have similar work situations as we do. Its very hard for me too because I work from home. I am not available to do the traditional SAHM outings and playgroups but I also dont have any coworkers (I do home daycare). My world is very small and because of my job, I find it hard to connect with other moms. Understandably, they prefer friends that either work with them or are available to do kid oriented stuff with them.....of which I can do neither.

Totally sympathize with you
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Old 06-02-2012, 06:49 PM   #3
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I totally sympathize. All my closest friends stay home...I work mon-thur and get left out a lot.
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Old 06-02-2012, 07:32 PM   #4
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Re: From SAHM to WOHM. Where did my friends go?

I hear you. I've been a WOHM forever (Well, not mom forever, but worked since getting out of school)... anyways... all my current "mom" friends, stay at home... it is hard. I hear them on Sundays at church talking about this 5K they're traing for and that mommy group they went to... or how they got together to take photos of each others kids ... and it stings. Not sure what to do about it though. I do have a few mom friends who also work full time, but they're just as busy as I am... and in the evenings, it's all about the kids... and on the weekends, it's just catching up on household stuff that got behind during the week. So, no advice... but I totally hear where you're coming from.
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Old 06-03-2012, 12:24 PM   #5
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Re: From SAHM to WOHM. Where did my friends go?

Quote:
Originally Posted by amcess721 View Post
I hear you. I've been a WOHM forever (Well, not mom forever, but worked since getting out of school)... anyways... all my current "mom" friends, stay at home... it is hard. I hear them on Sundays at church talking about this 5K they're traing for and that mommy group they went to... or how they got together to take photos of each others kids ... and it stings. Not sure what to do about it though. I do have a few mom friends who also work full time, but they're just as busy as I am... and in the evenings, it's all about the kids... and on the weekends, it's just catching up on household stuff that got behind during the week. So, no advice... but I totally hear where you're coming from.

I could have written this myself
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Old 06-03-2012, 12:29 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by amcess721
I hear you. I've been a WOHM forever (Well, not mom forever, but worked since getting out of school)... anyways... all my current "mom" friends, stay at home... it is hard. I hear them on Sundays at church talking about this 5K they're traing for and that mommy group they went to... or how they got together to take photos of each others kids ... and it stings. Not sure what to do about it though. I do have a few mom friends who also work full time, but they're just as busy as I am... and in the evenings, it's all about the kids... and on the weekends, it's just catching up on household stuff that got behind during the week. So, no advice... but I totally hear where you're coming from.
I agree 100%...
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Old 06-10-2012, 03:14 PM   #7
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Re: From SAHM to WOHM. Where did my friends go?

I am so sorry I envy you a bit for "getting" the SAHM thing. I am not cut out for it. I love being with my kids, but I became totally engrossed in being a good mom and homemaker and totally forgot myself.

There are working moms out there to be friends with! You just have to expand your circle of friends. Make new friends, but keep the old
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Old 06-12-2012, 06:57 AM   #8
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Re: From SAHM to WOHM. Where did my friends go?

Quote:
Originally Posted by amcess721 View Post
I hear you. I've been a WOHM forever (Well, not mom forever, but worked since getting out of school)... anyways... all my current "mom" friends, stay at home... it is hard. I hear them on Sundays at church talking about this 5K they're traing for and that mommy group they went to... or how they got together to take photos of each others kids ... and it stings. Not sure what to do about it though. I do have a few mom friends who also work full time, but they're just as busy as I am... and in the evenings, it's all about the kids... and on the weekends, it's just catching up on household stuff that got behind during the week. So, no advice... but I totally hear where you're coming from.
I am so there too. I am part of a mommies group and the ladies are wondeful about scheduling our playdates when I don't work (I am off every other Friday), but it is certainly a different world and I often feel like I don't really fit. Especially this fall, when my dd will be in preschool so even the Friday mornings that I don't work she will not be there for playgroup as all the other moms are or will be homeschooling.
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