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Old 06-22-2012, 08:23 PM   #11
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Re: How did you know you wanted 3?

I'll comment here because you asked about moms.
I have one brother, he was 7 years older than me. I always wished I had more siblings. One closer to me in age in particular.
I come from a family with one of each and DF comes from a family with one of each. Now we have one of each. It's hard to mess with one of each...

Right now I feel content, but my babe is only 6 months old. I would't be against another, but right now we're definitely not trying.
We pull out, that's it!!! But I would be upset if I got pregnant right now.

I always wanted 4 and then after our first I said 3-4. DF wanted one and then compromised with me and we had #2. He claims he's DONE and wants to get a V, but he's stalling and I think that him stalling is himself thinking he may want a third.

I'm hoping that one day I can get a third. I feel content now, but I don't feel DONE. You know? I'm content for maybe another year or 2, but then I think I'll want another.

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Old 06-22-2012, 09:21 PM   #12
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Re: How did you know you wanted 3?

I come from a 3 set. Boy, girl, boy order. There was always an odd man out. Always. Even now, I feel wayyyyyy closer to one than the other. I told dh Id have 4, but not 3. He would probably do 3, but not 4...so for now, were sticking to 2.
Thats just my experience. You should have another if you really want one. My mom always says "you cant miss what you dont have" but I think you can.
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Old 06-22-2012, 10:04 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sandhillcranes
I come from a 3 set. Boy, girl, boy order. There was always an odd man out. Always. Even now, I feel wayyyyyy closer to one than the other. I told dh Id have 4, but not 3. He would probably do 3, but not 4...so for now, were sticking to 2.
Thats just my experience. You should have another if you really want one. My mom always says "you cant miss what you dont have" but I think you can.
That's why we originally agreed on 4+. to me, two wasn't enough, 3 might result in middle child syndrome, so I wanted at least 4. Hubby wanted 3 to begin with. He was the oldest of 3, but 10 years older.
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Old 06-23-2012, 11:58 AM   #14
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Re: How did you know you wanted 3?

Well, i grew up in a family of 3> myself and two younger brothers. I always wanted more siblings, but more than that I have spent most of my life wishing I had a sister. From a kids perspective I think more kids in my family would have been great for me. That being said...now I am an adult and my parents adopted two babies from foster care. They are about to be 6 and 7. They take advantage of my parents, stress them out, scream and whine all the time, one of them even has neurological and behavioral problems from his mom being on drugs during pregnancy. Needless to say the kids are in a better home....but its been somewhat hard for the whole family. I say if you feel like you want to have 3 or more kids and you can handle it- then just go for it! but do put thought into your entire circumstance. Also, my mom and dad are both around 50 and have left the kids for us to take care of when they die. This kind of scares me at times since both of my parents are now having health problems .... Whatever will be will be, but I must say that is in the back of my mind. I dont want to think about that especially since I want to grow my own family.

And just for fun I will add that My husband and I have two kids right now and we would love to have 2-3 more!
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Old 06-23-2012, 05:20 PM   #15
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Re: How did you know you wanted 3?

That was my reasoning too. 2 kids just isn't enough... 3 there's a middle child and one gender that feels left out and with 4 (you could still have that one gender left out if you have 3 of one gender) but someone has a playmate and it just seemed like the right number to me.
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Old 06-24-2012, 12:50 PM   #16
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I would so have a 4th if I could gaurantee a girl! We have 1 girl, 2 boys.
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Old 06-24-2012, 12:54 PM   #17
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Re: How did you know you wanted 3?

I waited until it was even possible and really sat back and looked at our life. Could we AFFORD it (I'm sorry, I'm not on the have as many kids as possible, God will provide, frame of mind) I CAME from a very poor home. And it was NOT happy just on love, lol. So when DH got promoted and we got some more cushion, we said lets do it! ultimately I might like 4, but again, my kids WILL NOT live like I did, so finances play a part. We do not get any kind of aid. Gotta make it on our own

I'd have 10 if I could afford them! LOL
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Old 06-25-2012, 05:22 AM   #18
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Re: How did you know you wanted 3?

Quote:
Originally Posted by keen1981 View Post
I waited until it was even possible and really sat back and looked at our life. Could we AFFORD it (I'm sorry, I'm not on the have as many kids as possible, God will provide, frame of mind) I CAME from a very poor home. And it was NOT happy just on love, lol. So when DH got promoted and we got some more cushion, we said lets do it! ultimately I might like 4, but again, my kids WILL NOT live like I did, so finances play a part. We do not get any kind of aid. Gotta make it on our own

I'd have 10 if I could afford them! LOL
This is exactly how i feel. I don't want my kids to want for anything. I know that money is not the key to happiness, but i don't want to stress about it at all. My husband and i have been through some very hard times with just the two of us and it put a lot of stress on us. I just never want to feel that way with my kids.

On another note, i am one of 3 (older brother, twin sister) and it's almost like it's jsut me and my sister. He is only 2 1/2 years older than us, but he's so different from us that we just aren't close and really never have been. I guess we'll see what the future holds. I definitely don't think we'll have 4-just because my dh is older and so 4 would put him later than he'd like in life to have kids (which i totally respect). So 3 would be max...we'll see i guess.
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Old 06-26-2012, 10:06 PM   #19
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Re: How did you know you wanted 3?

I always said either 2 or 4 like several pp's.
We just couldn't make up our mind about #3, so we gave it one month of not preventing, and then I was going to start the pill.
Lo and behold, we are having 3 children.
I did know as soon as I saw the positive test though that we would not be having 4. So at least I feel like that decision is made.
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Old 06-26-2012, 11:48 PM   #20
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Re: How did you know you wanted 3?

I was one of three - oldest, with 2 younger brothers, and HATED it. So I've always said either 2 or 4, and 2 seemed so boring, so 4 it was. Within an hour of DS1's birth, I was ready to do it all over again. That feeling never went away, and we started ttc again when DS1 was 6/7mths. The boys are 30mths apart.

After DS2, I didn't have that urge again (and lol I realized why so many people stop at two!). He's 3.5 now and I still don't have the urge to have another one, but God had other ideas lol. I had always wanted a girl (much of that is to do with the fact I was never close to my mum), so I was always "maybe" on a third, with the knowledge that having #3 also means having #4.

Early this year we got to the point where I felt that we'd left it too late. We were leaving the baby stage, we could do more as a family, and DH kept saying he'd be happy to have a third if he could guarantee a girl. As much as I'd love a daughter, I am not okay with that, so we decided we were done with a capital D. I got a very surprise BFP (with low progesterone/LPD to boot) on St Patrick's Day. Probably a month after I had decided that I was okay with two, that we were done, and I had started to look into going back to school. I'm more excited now, but it took a LONG time for me to adjust--it really hit me hard. Still not sure on #4, but I was hoping for twins so I wouldn't have to think about it
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