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Old 07-28-2012, 12:25 AM   #1
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Question about homebirth (long, sorry!)....

Not sure if this is the place to put this.....

DS was a highly managed hospital birth. His heart rate was 5 bpm lower than what they wanted, and I was not progressing well enough (to their liking). I was physically exhausted from weeks of prodromal labor. I was dialating and the monitor showed contractions, but because I wasnt in a lot of pain they broke my water to speed it along (they didnt ask, just did it during the exam and I hadnt noticed the hook). I was restricted to the bed for 45 minutes of every hour. The jacuzzi tub was lukewarm at best, and not filled enough to let me relax (I am 5'8" and was huge at delivery). At the time I did what I thought was best and went along with the doctors. I ended up with an epidural when I was restricted to the bed for good since on my back.hurt like the ****ens! Less than 5 minutes after I delivered DS they delivered the placenta by doing an aggressive massage and pulling because DS has passed meconium (he had a tiny streak on his bum). I hemoragged and was not allowed to.nurse until they stopped the bleeding with pitocin.

I have never felt good about my birthing experience. I am starting to think about TTC baby #2 in a few months and I am considering homebirth. I am not scared of the pain, I was doing fine when I was up and moving. My body didnt want to.lay down, and it complicated the pain management.

Im scared of the idea of hemoragging at home. I would love to hear from mamas who had a hospital delivery and a homebirth how they differed. Is it reasonable to feel like the hospital interventions I had complicated things?

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Old 07-28-2012, 12:33 AM   #2
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Re: Question about homebirth (long, sorry!)....

MY first was born in the hospital under the care of a midwife. Unfortunately, she was under the advisement of an OB, one that I had never met but who was making decisions for my care over the phone. It was a struggle from front to back trying to have the birth that I wanted. Ultimately, there were no interventions in the birth of my son but it was not the experience that I was hoping for. I also had the nice "massage" and tug to get the placenta out right around the 10/15 minute mark. I think that they only waited that long because I insisted that the cord stop pulsing before they cut it.

Both of my girls were then born at home. Free of people telling me how I should feel, when I could walk, when to push...both of those were amazing. My first HB I delivered the placenta at exactly 1 hour after i had my little girl -- I KNOW they would not have let me go that long at the hospital. My second I delivered it right around the 45 minute mark and again know that I would not have been "allowed" to wait that long for it to come naturally. I came away from both of those births feeling incredibly empowered.

I encourage you to read, read, read. Good stories. Bad stories. Educate yourself and know what you want. Homebirth is amazing.

ETA: All of my babies' birth stories are linked in my signature if you care to read them.
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Old 07-28-2012, 12:37 AM   #3
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Re: Question about homebirth (long, sorry!)....

I think you're capable of having a good hospital birth experience or a good home birth experience. It different with the second baby. You know what to expect and you'll find that you're more willing to say whats on your mind.

If you're feeling the calling to have your next baby at home that is great! For me, personally I require the presence of a Certified Nurse Midwife. This is to say a Registered Nurse who has gone on for additional training in midwifery and obstetrics and is board certified to preform as a midwife with prescribing privileges (AKA she brings some potentially lifesaving medications to the party). I personally wouldn't choose a midwife with any type of license but a CNM and she would also have to have some excellent references and years of experience in home birth.
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Old 07-28-2012, 12:39 AM   #4
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Re: Question about homebirth (long, sorry!)....

I have had 2 hospital births and 3 homebirths. I think it would be wise for you to interview some homebirth midwives in your area. Usually it is free and I don't think it would matter that you are just TTCing and not quite pregnant yet.

My first hospital birth was a lot like yours. I was induced with pitocin, stuck in the bed on monitors (never encouraged to be up and moving), they broke my water, they kept telling me to get an epidural as the pain would only get worse, and then when I was pushing the CNM gave me an episiotomy without my consent because my 8.5lb baby was too big and I would tear (I later went on to have a 10lb14oz baby at home with no tearing). It wasn't the worst of the worst, but I definitely felt like cattle and I know so many friends who had similar interventions who were not as lucky and ended up with more serious complications or ended up having to have c-sections. All of them went on to have homebirths with their subsequent babies.

I know homebirth isn't right for everybody and isn't right in all circumstances (one of my hospital births was due to my LO coming at 34 weeks, so our planned homebirth got thrown out the window for obvious reasons), but I think it can be a great option if you are a healthy low-risk pregnancy. Again, something to discuss with a midwife.

I loved my homebirths because I was able to be comfortable in my own space, I never felt any pressure for things to move along at a certain pace, I didn't have to be stuck in a bed or on monitors, I could eat what I wanted when I wanted to. I called the shots, pretty much. My midwives would come and just hang out and it was like having friends over who every so often would check baby's heart rate and maybe rub my back or suggest a position that might benefit me, but they were pretty hands off until after the baby was out.

Definitely look into it and discuss your prior birth with midwives. My first homebirth (second baby) was an accidental unassisted homebirth and I ended up having a retained placenta. I was transferred to the hospital by ambulance and they had to manually scrape it out because it was stuck to my uterus and in pieces. When I wanted to plan a homebirth for my third baby I was afraid this would happen again and didn't want to end up having to go to the hospital again, so I interviewed midwives and told them about it. The midwives I chose told me that probably happened because of the surprise homebirth and that it was unlikely to happen again, but if it did they told me what they would do in that situation and I liked their answer and chose them. I was lucky to not have that happen again, but if it did I would have totally trusted their opinions on what to do.

Sorry for the novel! I hope you can get some answers and feel more comfortable and empowered with your next birth, whether it be in the hospital or at home.
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Old 07-28-2012, 12:44 AM   #5
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Re: Question about homebirth (long, sorry!)....

I've had two homebirths my first (2008) lasted 8 hours from the very first contraction to DS birth. My 2nd (2010) lasted 3 hrs and of those 15 mins spent pushing. With DS I was in CT and my homebirthing team was really nice and professional and allowed me to deliver the placenta without any assistance besides a very gentle tummy massage. With DD I was in a diff state with 2 MWs I met on the day I was delivering as my original MW had a death in the family and had been gone for a few days and would have been back the day after.

I didn't quite mesh with the original MW but the two backup MWs were AWESOME. They massaged me to sleep before the 'real work' would begin and kept massaging me through the intense contractions on and off for the next 3 hours. I loved my birthing experience with them and my only complaint was that within mins of delivering DD they wanted me to deliver the placenta and tried to give it a ''pull" and it hurt so I told them to back off. I delivered the placenta within 30 mins of birthing and nursing my DD so there was no hemorrhaging, no tears, no complications.

Since I'm expecting #3 in Feb 2013 I've again opted for a homebirth and have chosen those same 2 MW to be present and I just have to make sure that at the end of the birth they don't try to rush getting the placenta out. Other than that I loved my experience with them.
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Old 07-28-2012, 01:02 AM   #6
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Originally Posted by Umm_Ibraheem
I've had two homebirths my first (2008) lasted 8 hours from the very first contraction to DS birth. My 2nd (2010) lasted 3 hrs and of those 15 mins spent pushing. With DS I was in CT and my homebirthing team was really nice and professional and allowed me to deliver the placenta without any assistance besides a very gentle tummy massage. With DD I was in a diff state with 2 MWs I met on the day I was delivering as my original MW had a death in the family and had been gone for a few days and would have been back the day after.

I didn't quite mesh with the original MW but the two backup MWs were AWESOME. They massaged me to sleep before the 'real work' would begin and kept massaging me through the intense contractions on and off for the next 3 hours. I loved my birthing experience with them and my only complaint was that within mins of delivering DD they wanted me to deliver the placenta and tried to give it a ''pull" and it hurt so I told them to back off. I delivered the placenta within 30 mins of birthing and nursing my DD so there was no hemorrhaging, no tears, no complications.

Since I'm expecting #3 in Feb 2013 I've again opted for a homebirth and have chosen those same 2 MW to be present and I just have to make sure that at the end of the birth they don't try to rush getting the placenta out. Other than that I loved my experience with them.
Your second birth sounds AMAZING! I begged for massages lol but when DH massaged me the contractions slowed and dropped in intensity so the doctor told him to stop??

Yes rushing the placenta hurt. I shot upright and they had to hold me.down. I really want to deliver it naturally next time and to be left alone.

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Old 07-28-2012, 08:32 AM   #7
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Re: Question about homebirth (long, sorry!)....

I think a homebirth may be a good option I don't understand the rush to birth the placenta! I never have delivered mine for at least a half hour are baby, I would be quite annoyed if someone was trying to rush that. I would bring that up to any healthcare provider right up front and let them know you don't want a repeat experience.
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Old 07-28-2012, 10:39 AM   #8
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Originally Posted by marliah
I think a homebirth may be a good option I don't understand the rush to birth the placenta! I never have delivered mine for at least a half hour are baby, I would be quite annoyed if someone was trying to rush that. I would bring that up to any healthcare provider right up front and let them know you don't want a repeat experience.
I think what has been scary is friends who delivered here saying they requested to wait but were aggressively handled to rapidly deliver the placenta.

After a homebirth I know the midwife is there for a while, but how long? I had checks every 2 hours for 24 hours to see id my uterus was shrinking by kneading my belly. What is done for that?

On my smart phone which is clearly not as smart as it seems to believe
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Old 07-28-2012, 11:19 AM   #9
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Re: Question about homebirth (long, sorry!)....

Quote:
Originally Posted by jessnic View Post
I think what has been scary is friends who delivered here saying they requested to wait but were aggressively handled to rapidly deliver the placenta.

After a homebirth I know the midwife is there for a while, but how long? I had checks every 2 hours for 24 hours to see id my uterus was shrinking by kneading my belly. What is done for that?

On my smart phone which is clearly not as smart as it seems to believe
It really depends on the birth. One time I gave birth just after midnight and the midwives stayed until 7am the next morning. They came back that evening though (it is standard for them to come back within 24 hours). Another time I gave birth at 5pm and they stayed until 9pm and came back the next day around the 24 hour mark.
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Old 07-28-2012, 11:24 AM   #10
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Re: Question about homebirth (long, sorry!)....

It's quite possible that they caused the hemorrhage by tugging on the cord before the placenta was detached. If you pull on the cord before that happens then you can cause a tear, which will bleed (aka hemorrhage). Generally speaking of course that sort of thing doesn't happen in a homebirth. They do stuff like that in the hospital to clear out rooms faster and to accommodate the dr's. schedules.

And I'm very familiar with them wanting the placenta delivered asap.
http://www.diaperswappers.com/forum/...d.php?t=917166
I went on to deliver my third child at home. No problems. There were things the MW could have handled better but all in all it was a great experience. I did the same thing as the poster of post 5 did. I took questions to the MW during my interview with her about things I was concerned about happening at home. Her answers were logical and put my mind at ease. The HB was so much better and what is even better is that I didn't have to fight for the things I wanted, like I would have had to at the hospital. I can't even imagine going into labor and having to fight for my rights. I felt so much safer at home.
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