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Old 08-07-2012, 05:20 PM   #21
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There is a boy in our nursery that has severe nut and milk allergies. Because kids are kids, we have only "approved" snacks in there, even though he isn't in there all the time. It's just easier that way and the other moms don't mind either. We decided we would rather be safe than sorry, since all the moms interacting with most of the kids at some point. Would it be possible to only have snacks that are approved by you?

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Old 08-07-2012, 08:32 PM   #22
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There is a boy in our nursery that has severe nut and milk allergies. Because kids are kids, we have only "approved" snacks in there, even though he isn't in there all the time. It's just easier that way and the other moms don't mind either. We decided we would rather be safe than sorry, since all the moms interacting with most of the kids at some point. Would it be possible to only have snacks that are approved by you?

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Not making excuses for them- but this church is a different cultural background. Even if they didn't hand out the Korean snacks all the kids are used to- there would still be soy in the lunch provided. so basically... I have to wear DS (yeah- right! Too mobile now) if I really want him away from it. They know of his allergies- I've told them multiple times yet the kids still eat their snacks wherever (sometimes in the exersaucers because they don't have enough hands) then ds will use it- or sometimes he'll try to grab one. They do wipe things down though... Supposedly everything is cleaned each week... But I kind of doubt that. Idk. I know I need to be his advocate & go as far as I can without butting heads too much. The woman in the nursery loves him beyond words so she always has eyes on him or holds him when she can.
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Old 08-07-2012, 10:18 PM   #23
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Right now, watch him carefully and determine the level of reaction. Mild, rash and vomiting is okay, but anything more you should get him seen by a doctor. I'd call the nurse help line or after hours service, so that they have a record if you need to go in.

I have severe food and plant allergies. Although my oldest has tested only for soy and plant allergies, we opted for in home care. No nurseries or daycare. With #2, allergies are also present.

We encountered some allergy unfriendly DCPs and see peanut butter and soy all too often. Even providing snacks, they would touch other foods, THEN the food for the kids with allergies... Um, HELLO!!! The safest thing is to NOT have them around people and places that there is a high exposure risk. Poor food hygiene and contamination practices are not to be taken lightly. Many schools here don't allow peanut butter or PB&J sandwiches. So, I don't get why daycares or church nurseries should be any different. If they won't accommodate, then the best thing is to remove your children from the risk.
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Old 08-08-2012, 05:29 AM   #24
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If they won't accommodate, then the best thing is to remove your children from the risk.
I agree. You no longer have the option of letting people get by without taking proper precautions. No one wants to butt heads, but if you want him to stay at that nursery you need to butt heads if that is needed. You need to be more assertive and if they don't want to accommodate then you need to move on. Go to a different church, get a baby sitter, whatever. Going with the flow isn't an option anymore. I quit my job because we couldn't find a care provider willing to take the steps needed. The real kicker is that I was a preschool teacher at a school that was peanut free and dd was on their waiting list. A part time spot came open and instead of letting me put dd in part time they gave it to someone else and dd stayed on the list for a full time spot. 2 months with no spot and dd's provider tried to keep her separate during meal times, but refused to go peanut free or keep her epi pen. I quit and stayed home. I have already said we chose dd's school for kindy based on their allergy handling. Its a public charter with no buses. I will have to drive her and pick her up everyday- rain, snow or shine. Not that I would actually let her ride the bus for her local regular public school- morning buses are very bad for peanut allergies. When I told her doc that she would not be on the bus the doc was actually relieved that wasn't a conversation she would have to have. I always expected that I would drive my kids for kindy then they would be on the bus. But that isn't going to happen.

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Old 08-08-2012, 05:48 AM   #25
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I agree. You no longer have the option of letting people get by without taking proper precautions. No one wants to butt heads, but if you want him to stay at that nursery you need to butt heads if that is needed. You need to be more assertive and if they don't want to accommodate then you need to move on. Go to a different church, get a baby sitter, whatever. Going with the flow isn't an option anymore. I quit my job because we couldn't find a care provider willing to take the steps needed. The real kicker is that I was a preschool teacher at a school that was peanut free and dd was on their waiting list. A part time spot came open and instead of letting me put dd in part time they gave it to someone else and dd stayed on the list for a full time spot. 2 months with no spot and dd's provider tried to keep her separate during meal times, but refused to go peanut free or keep her epi pen. I quit and stayed home. I have already said we chose dd's school for kindy based on their allergy handling. Its a public charter with no buses. I will have to drive her and pick her up everyday- rain, snow or shine. Not that I would actually let her ride the bus for her local regular public school- morning buses are very bad for peanut allergies. When I told her doc that she would not be on the bus the doc was actually relieved that wasn't a conversation she would have to have. I always expected that I would drive my kids for kindy then they would be on the bus. But that isn't going to happen.

Its not the world we expected or planned, but its the one we got. And its the one we're working with.
I get this. I stay at home too- I'm nervous about when he'll start kindy. Unfortunately another church is not an option- DH is a youth Pastor here. I know I need to be more proactive. It's a pain to be a b**** . I guess I can tell hem to leave him in the crib while hey feed the others- and deal with his screaming. (which I myself would not do) or I guess I'll just provide snacks for everyone... Which again I feel like I shouldn't have to do- but hey. Maybe they won't give other allergens (besides lunch to the kids). Technically IDK why they even need to give them lunch because the whole congregation eats together- so I'd think that the kids aren't going to eat with mom & dad. Snacks should be enough. I'll talk to DH about it- but TBH I don't think he sees ds2s allergies for what they really are either. :/
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Old 08-08-2012, 05:50 AM   #26
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Oh- I really hadn't even thought of buses- thanks for bringing that to light! Hugh. I want to go back to school SO bad... But with his allergies I just cannot that his care to anyone else. (especially since we are 14 he's from any family.) the nursery is the only place he goes.
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Old 08-08-2012, 08:53 AM   #27
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Re: Theowing up from allergy...

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Oh- I really hadn't even thought of buses- thanks for bringing that to light! Hugh. I want to go back to school SO bad... But with his allergies I just cannot that his care to anyone else. (especially since we are 14 he's from any family.) the nursery is the only place he goes.
I have and will be again doing internet and night classes. Most classes you can get at night. i had one that was 6:00 to 10:00 once a week- that sucked royally but it was a good option to get it done while dh could care for dd (we didn't have ds then). I have 3 years before both kids will be in school full day then I will go back to work part time- still have to be able to pick up and drop off kids. if you can afford a nanny or a good babysitter that might be an option. I was actually very aware of life threatening food allergies before I got thrown into the fire. i had a friend whose son had a peanut allergy (and others)-also how i found out the dangers of the bus- her son had several reactions on the bus when kids got on after eating breakfast and touched him. his driver was allowed to have the epi pen, not all places allow that. Anyway, we have rules for people coming into our house- we have never had a babysitter except grandma (she's an hour away so that is not often)- no food is allowed in our house. If you have someone caring for him in your house where its should be relatively safe. A good babysitter or nanny should have no issues following the no outside food rule or only feed him from this list- nothing else. If you have an epi make sure they demonstrate how to use not just say they know. I keep the trainer that comes with them with the pen so we can show people or have them demonstrate. Easy for me to say dd's 5 and we still have not left her with a baby sitter, but we really don't go anywhere without the kids though. She did go to preschool last year and i did make her teacher show me how to use the epi with the trainer- even though she told me she was trained. She gave me a crazy look, but I am a really nice person and get along with just about everybody. When I dig my heals in people take notice and they don't get offended because they know in general i am not going to fuss or be difficult, but they also know there are things i will not budge on.
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Old 08-08-2012, 11:37 AM   #28
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I have and will be again doing internet and night classes. Most classes you can get at night. i had one that was 6:00 to 10:00 once a week- that sucked royally but it was a good option to get it done while dh could care for dd (we didn't have ds then). I have 3 years before both kids will be in school full day then I will go back to work part time- still have to be able to pick up and drop off kids. if you can afford a nanny or a good babysitter that might be an option. I was actually very aware of life threatening food allergies before I got thrown into the fire. i had a friend whose son had a peanut allergy (and others)-also how i found out the dangers of the bus- her son had several reactions on the bus when kids got on after eating breakfast and touched him. his driver was allowed to have the epi pen, not all places allow that. Anyway, we have rules for people coming into our house- we have never had a babysitter except grandma (she's an hour away so that is not often)- no food is allowed in our house. If you have someone caring for him in your house where its should be relatively safe. A good babysitter or nanny should have no issues following the no outside food rule or only feed him from this list- nothing else. If you have an epi make sure they demonstrate how to use not just say they know. I keep the trainer that comes with them with the pen so we can show people or have them demonstrate. Easy for me to say dd's 5 and we still have not left her with a baby sitter, but we really don't go anywhere without the kids though. She did go to preschool last year and i did make her teacher show me how to use the epi with the trainer- even though she told me she was trained. She gave me a crazy look, but I am a really nice person and get along with just about everybody. When I dig my heals in people take notice and they don't get offended because they know in general i am not going to fuss or be difficult, but they also know there are things i will not budge on.
Thanks! Nannies/sitters aren't a huge option right now. DH is a full time (with actually double the workload this year because tabs "special" degree) working on his ThM- this is basically the 1st year that he'll start his thesis. Then his job is a youth pastor which takes a ton of time but pays a ridiculously small amount. What I'm currently going for is early childhood/elem Ed- but I need to be in the classroom for it. Also considering switching to nursing- but again- that's full on practicums. I know my time will come when it's right.
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