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Old 08-27-2012, 06:00 PM   #11
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Re: Just annoyed and frustrated re: potty training

I would try the 3 day method. It normal for them to not really initiate at first and just pee wherever. All of my kids did. The 3 day method worked well for my girls. My ds trained because I was pregnant and peeing a lot. He was in underwear for a rash and kept following me so he didn't initiate on his own. My girls who I did the 3 day method with did tell me when they had to go. My youngest has the occasional accident but she tells me before she goes now but didn't during the process of training. I prefer using underwear than the naked method. It is very normal for them to have lots of accidents until it clicks.

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Old 08-27-2012, 06:09 PM   #12
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Re: Just annoyed and frustrated re: potty training

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I would try the 3 day method. It normal for them to not really initiate at first and just pee wherever. All of my kids did. The 3 day method worked well for my girls. My ds trained because I was pregnant and peeing a lot. He was in underwear for a rash and kept following me so he didn't initiate on his own. My girls who I did the 3 day method with did tell me when they had to go. My youngest has the occasional accident but she tells me before she goes now but didn't during the process of training. I prefer using underwear than the naked method. It is very normal for them to have lots of accidents until it clicks.
I would have to ship DD somewhere else if I did the 3-day method (and I've even heard of THAT method taking longer than just "three" days before it clicks). But I don't have anywhere to ship her. No family is nearby and it would be a burden on my friends for them to keep her for that long. And then there's no guarantee that it will click for him within that time.
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Old 08-28-2012, 06:07 AM   #13
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Re: Just annoyed and frustrated re: potty training

Why would you need to send your DD somewhere if you did the 3 day method? I trained a puppy (we had got a week before I started with DS) and DS at the same time. I just locked them both (along with me) in the living/dining room, removed all furniture that either could hide behind, and removed all but a few toys. I kept an eye on both of them and it worked. Though full disclosure, the dog was trained before the kid.

I don't know how old your DD is but this could work for you. Trust me if I could do it like I did (and less then a week after finishing radiation treatment) anyone can do it!

Good luck!
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Old 08-28-2012, 06:27 AM   #14
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We did the 3 day method but it was closer to a week before it really worked. The first 3 days we lived in the kitchen I brought new activities and a couple new movies to keep us occupied. I was really stir crazy and ready to throw in the towel but so glad I went through those few days of misery! I expanded our play space the next few days but we still did not leave the house. I also got rid of diapers /pull ups all together even at night I told DS they were not coming back! It's a tough thing to go through for sure. Good luck!!
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Old 08-28-2012, 08:30 AM   #15
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Re: Just annoyed and frustrated re: potty training

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Why would you need to send your DD somewhere if you did the 3 day method?
She is 5, almost 6, and smart and active and sneaky. More than once, she's gotten out of bed in the middle of the night to open up peanut butter or whatever and eat. During the day, if she notices that I'm giving DS all my attention (and trust me, that will NOT go by unnoticed by her), she will use that opportunity to do "interesting" things to try to get MY attention. Confining her to a small area would drive us both crazy after only half a day, much less three days or a week or more.

But anyway, I can't really do the method anyway because I also work at home, and the household needs my little bit of income or we won't make ends meet, and my income is production based, so if I don't work then I don't get paid. If I knew FOR SURE that it would ONLY take three days, I could possibly do it, but more often than not, I hear stories of the "three-day" method taking a week or more.
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Old 08-28-2012, 11:15 AM   #16
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Re: Just annoyed and frustrated re: potty training

I don't know much about EC, and I know some people won't agree with me, but for us rewards were key! We did 3 day, but you could still apply the rewards system by just adding it to your current routine. Anytime he goes any pee/poop in the potty he would get a reward, and then throughout the day remind him that if he pees/poops in the potty he would get.... (like a few MnMs or whatever you know he likes). With my DS (he's 2) he saw every opportunity, so for the first while he went potty A LOT! just to get his candy. We actually had to do bigger prizes with the pooping, because it took a few weeks for him to figure that out, but as soon as I caught a poop on the potty and he got a cool Thomas prize, he was all over it!!

Now we have changed it pretty frequently to help with the skills so that he can potty by himself, for example, now he gets 1 candy for taking off his clothes, 1 for keeping ALL the pee in the potty (ha!) and another one for putting his underwear and pants back on by himself (we're due with #2 soon, so the sooner he can potty by himself the better!)

I like the think of them as rewards, not bribes - there is something you want him to do and he wants to get something out of it. Just like us, how many of us would work if we didn't get paid.

What I think is really funny about it is that for a few days, every time I went potty he said - "mommy pee pee - mommy get candy!"
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Old 08-29-2012, 11:48 PM   #17
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I also recommend the 3 day method. I did it with Dd1 when she was 22 months and it took her about a week. And just recently potty trained my 26 month old, with my 3 yr old and 5 month old in the house and she got it in 1 day. Seriously, by the end of the 1st day she was telling me when she needed to go.
Maybe you could start on a weekend when your dh would be around to help? I think the older ones tend to get it faster but ate also more stubborn. But this method works really well for independent type kids. Potty training really is a skill that needs to be learned and practiced like any other thing they are learning and consistency is key.
Good luck!
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Old 08-30-2012, 08:31 AM   #18
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Re: Just annoyed and frustrated re: potty training

My DH help on the weekend?

Oh, sorry, did I laugh out loud there? In all seriousness, his hours during the week are so long that he does quite a bit of "resting" during the weekend. Plus our "weekend" is really just Saturday since we go to church twice on Sunday, and potty training at church isn't really convenient (and we go on Wednesdays, too, and I also take the kids to my doctor 40 minutes away each Wednesday for my shots), so that's another reason the 3-to-7-day method won't work for us. There are too many situations where I just CAN'T have an accident, so the child in question would HAVE to wear a diaper of some sort. So if I'm "training" on the other days but "not training" during those times I mentioned, then that's not consistent, and I'm back to my catch-22. I *could* carve out a Thursday/Friday/Saturday to do this, IF I knew it would only take the three days. But I don't. And with one exception in this thread, everyone who has stated a timeframe that it took for their child to learn has said it took a week or two. I can't commit to that. We will go broke. I will get too far behind with DD's schooling (we homeschool). I can't miss my weekly shots or I might have another preemie.

I'm not really leaning towards doing rewards (like a chocolate chip or whatever), because 1) I don't think he would connect the candy to pottying and 2) I don't like using food as a behavior modification tool and 3) I don't want him to get "addicted" to the award and only decide to go potty if he can get a treat.

Maybe all this means I'll still have a four-year-old in diapers, day and night. Fine. I don't care. It doesn't mean I'm a failure as a mother, just that I'm a failure at potty training. And I AM a failure at that, because I have never heard of anyone else, online OR in real life, whose child takes so long and is so old when they are finally potty independent.
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Old 08-30-2012, 09:05 AM   #19
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Re: Just annoyed and frustrated re: potty training

Years ago I had a friend who had some words of wisdom. While she was experiencing frustration w/potty training, someone older told her this: You don't see adults who are having potty accidents out in public (OK, not w/o medical reasons). Just give it some time & relax a little. I've also read that you can not control their bodily functions. If somehow the process turns into a battle of wills, they will win. My 34 mo DD just potty trained. She showed signs of having the ability to control things & an awareness of what needed to happen at 18 mos. However, she has NEVER been amenable to sitting on the potty b/c I request it. In fact, for a time, my suggestion would more often result in an accident b/c she'd refuse. She's not a difficult or particularly stubborn child, but in this area, she was adamant. I finally learned that she can hold it longer than I thought. I've learned not to push (I do still ask, sometimes) & she's learned to tell me when she needs to go. Anyway, good luck with it all,. DON"T beat yourself up if taking a more relaxed, wait & see, approach is what works for your family. Everyone's home situation is different!! This is my 4th & I was all about encouraging her, but not forcing or spending my whole day (for days on end) following her around trying to gauge when she might need to go. I'd have been just fine continuing to diaper her for another 6 mos or so, if she needed that time. (I have to confess that by the time they're approaching 4 yrs, it feels that they should be working on this skill.) Hang in there!!
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Old 08-30-2012, 09:25 AM   #20
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My DD will be 3.5 and won't potty train either. I did the 3 day method for 2.5 weeks with NO success. Not one. She knows when she has to go but refuses to go on the potty. I've tried rewards, only panties, naked etc... She is supposed to start preschool on Thursday and when I tell her she can't go if she wont pee on the potty she says it's not worth it.

I have zero advice only
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