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Old 07-05-2012, 08:34 AM   #41
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Re: What no one tells you about a miscarriage - graphic

Originally Posted by rachaeljohnson View Post
amen...i had a d&c with my first but she missed the baby and i went into labor 3 days later and passed a very recognizable little person and placenta after LABOR...and definite CONTRACTIONS not was HORRIFYING. Big giant hugs...why they don't tell you how bad it can be i don't know...sigh.
Wow I cant believe you had to go through BOTH mama


[CENTER]Jamie wife of 8 years to R, Homeschooling mom to 7 year old Jorden and 3 yearold Abigail My unmedicated hosptal VBAC amazing little girl.
Lost my bean on 4/16/2012
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Old 07-05-2012, 09:21 AM   #42
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Originally Posted by jamiejo

Wow I cant believe you had to go through BOTH mama
I agree. How does that happen!! Unacceptable! But my passing was labor too, you are right, there. Contractions and a complete sack.
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Old 07-09-2012, 05:37 PM   #43
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Originally Posted by rachaeljohnson
amen...i had a d&c with my first but she missed the baby and i went into labor 3 days later and passed a very recognizable little person and placenta after LABOR...and definite CONTRACTIONS not was HORRIFYING. Big giant hugs...why they don't tell you how bad it can be i don't know...sigh.
Same thing happened to me with one of my m/c's (not the d&c but the actual labor and passing).

Amanda . Blaming my phone for typos and crap.
Amanda- wife to DH. Mama to W (2010), L (2011), H (2013), K (2016)
Forever missing Jeremiah Asher (our angel lost to Anencephaly at 31 weeks)- November 6th, 2015
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Old 08-03-2012, 03:27 PM   #44
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My heart goes out to you mamas! I want to share my story too... Sorry it is so long. I've had multiple losses

April 2009 I had a D&C @ 7ish weeks for a missed miscarriage - believed blighted ovum or chemical that had reabsorbed into my lining. No gest. sac no nothing really... ( it was our first baby hubby had just deployed) and I swore if I ever lost a baby again I would do so naturally...

April 2010 Blessed with the birth of our Rainbow! He is a beautiful bright strong willed two year old now!

* Graphic*

March 2012 what started out natural ended in D&C (Hubby TDY... So gone again!) I was 11 weeks. I started spotting over the weekend and it took 3 days until I needed a pad, then 2 days of "medium flow" until labor began. I put my 2yr old to bed. Filled the bath and waited. Contractions got stronger, I passed the sac and baby, could identify everything! The sac was the size of my open palm. The baby was about the size of a grape, could see arm buds, head/eye sockets. The tadpole- spine/tale. Even the cord...

My baby, in my hands. I will never forget those moments. I collected the baby and what tissue I could hoping they would be able to test the remains to find out what went wrong.

Oh the gushing... It was just like pp said... My bathroom looked like a murder scene! I was so unprepared, I only had light pads as I was in denial up until that day. I ended up grabbing some gCloth and a big towel.
I called a neighbor and a friend. I started getting dizzy and the chills. My neighbor stayed with my son and my friend took me to the ER.

I was sent up to labor and delivery... Every step I gushed, when the midwife came to the door I said "I am having a miscarriage" she said "how do you know" I said "I am carrying the baby in a jar in my purse and there is a trail of blood behind me... Does that answer your question" (really... Come on now)

They got me into an exam room, did an ultrasound which showed my uterus empty, however, the dr doing the exam delivered the placenta and then told me that my cervix was closing and there was tissue stuck in it so they Prep'ed me for another D&C I was hoping since the ultrasound showed an "empty womb" I could avoid the surgery. No such luck.

The results of the pathology indicated an infection that could not be identified. I was tested and came back neg. so it could have been the beginning of infection due to retaining the pregnancy, it could have been cause by listeria... (The only thing I craved was deli meat sandwiches) it could have been bacteria from the bath water. I will never know.

What I love about my hospital is that they offer a burial service free of charge. They do it every quarter and your baby goes in with the others that were lost in that quarter. The parents are invited to a short service. It is a very special place.

Aug 2012. Here I am waiting on a miscarriage of our 2nd rainbow baby, a blighted ovum. I would be 9/10weeks. Wishing for a successful natural miscarriage as the risks of scaring after multiple d&Cs could further complicate future pregnancies. Started spotting yesterday. Hope it is the same timeline as the last one... but with better results. Umm, not that any of this is "good" I would really just like to do it without medical intervention. I think now that I know what to expect, I can be more prepared.

I am torn.
On one hand, the d&Cs are physically easy/less messy compared to a natural loss. However, they carry inherently more risks... Potential uterin scaring and or perforation, incompetent cervix, infection, and as a pp experienced, the chance of missing the pregnancy and still going through the miscarriage anyway! However, this is my third loss and if I go for the D&C they will do genetic testing to see if we can find out why we keep loosing babies.

With my semi/ natural miscarriage, although devastating, my mind excepted the loss much quicker, there was this "I see it, I know it" mentality, where as with my first loss and D&C because I never spotted or bleed, I always have the nagging "what if" feeling.

I guess I can update after this one if it would help anyone?

Wishing you all the best! Thank you for starting this thread. As hard as it is, I wish I had known what to expect and what to look out for. Hope this helps someone who is trying to decide what course of action to take.
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Old 08-05-2012, 05:01 PM   #45
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Re: What no one tells you about a miscarriage - graphic

I've had two.

The first one was really, really bad. I didn't hemorrage, thankfully- but it was as painful as transitional labor. Maybe worse. I was rolling around the floor of the ER in my own vomit screaming until their determined that I wasn't a drug seeker and gave me morphine. The miscarriage completed naturally.

I was 13 weeks by the calendar, baby was only 9 weeks in size and deteriorating so it had been a while. Had I known earlier, I would have opted for a D&C, rather than to walk around with dead tissue in my womb and deal with the emotional dangling of knowing it wasn't over... I immensely prefer a clean break.

Second time was only 5 weeks, and it was exactly like a bad period.

Neither was really anything terrible for me emotionally once they were over.
Me, a WOHM, DH Dave, DD Ruby
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Old 08-29-2012, 12:29 AM   #46
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Re: What no one tells you about a miscarriage - graphic

Mamas I am so sorry for your is never easy to say goodbye before you get to say hello.

I also have had two very early misscarriages before 8 weeks.. very much like a period.

However in 2003 I was pregnant with twin girls and had found out that I was carrying identical twin girls at 15 weeks along. When I went back at 2 weeks for another ultrasound I felt quite uneasy due to a horrible dream about something being wrong with my baby. Plus I had went alone to my appt.

When I went in the tech was so quiet and didn not speak to me while scanning. She asked if I minded if she stepped out for a moment to talk to one of the perinatoligist. I felt then something was wrong..when they came back in she( the peri) while the ultrasoun tech stood by the door. She looked over everything and then told me that I had what was called Twin to Twin Transfusion.

She informed me that one of my babied had most likely died a week before at 19 weeks. My other twin looked healthy and alert but we had to make a choice to keep the babies or abort the pregnancy due to the fact that the decomposing of her twin can be passed thru the placenta into our living twin bloodstream or brain causing brain damage or large developmental delays. Of course keeping the pregnancy meant keeping our twin who passed inside until delivery.(which they believed I would go full term)

I decided to keep the pregnancy and see what happened. I experienced polyhydronamios..Excess fluid. At 20 weeks I measured 38. The excess water made me keep going into labor and they put me on bedrest and meds in the hospital. I was leaking a brownish pinkish fluid. I was released after a week to go home to partial bedrest. Once I took my last pill to stop contractions..I started having small pains.

I was 23.6 days and after a few hours I realized it was in wavesthe pain would come so my husband took us to the hospital. Once their they took me in almost immidiatly and checked me and I was already 10 cm. They hurried around and started giving me fluids and meds to stop my contractions. I was also given meds to help our living babys lungs develop. They were trying to stop the labor..however I was in so much pain and they finally did a ultrasound and our little girl who had passed was in the pelvic canal. So they asked me to push when I had a contraction. She was delivered and whisked away. She was 9 ozs and 10 inches long. We named her Bailey Renee Grace

Then they continued to try to stop my contractions and keep our living baby in as long as possible so I could get all 3 of the shots we needed for her lungs. I managed to keep her in for hours..until the next day. She was born at 24 wks. in the caul. She was 1 lb. 3 ozs and 12 inches. We named her Brooke Lynn Victoria. She was taken to the NICU and stayed their for 4.5 months

Everyday I am greatful for the little bit left of my Bailey. I was given her blanket she was wrapped in and her little gown and hat and a teddy bear. I also was given 4 pictures of her. She was very red and black and you can tell that she had passed quite some time before. She still looked like my baby though..and my only regret was that I was never offered to hold her. I wish we would have held her just to get more closure.

Sorry this was so long.
Rachael Mommy to: Savannah 10. Brooke 9 Ava 7.
Taylor 5, Kira 3 , Zoey July 2011
and Bailey (in my heart but god's arms)
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Old 09-06-2012, 12:38 AM   #47
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Re: What no one tells you about a miscarriage - graphic

I had one natural mc and three D&Cs... with my most recent D&C after starting to MC on my own.

D&Cs are the way to go. Recovery time is longer and a little rough, but not as bad as MCing on your own, IMO. The last D&C I had, I had been "miscarrying" for 4 days on my own already... and hadn't passed the baby. Couldn't be on my feet even a few minutes without collapsing into pain. My first MC I was only a couple weeks along and jsut wanted to die I was in such horrible, intense pain.
♥ Wife to Eric [9/26/2009] ♥ Mama to Collin [1/18/2010] ♥ Mama to seven angels [9/6/2011][12/27/2011][4/10/2012][7/22/2012][10/8/2012][3/18/2013][9/3/2013] <3 Praying for a Rainbow <3
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Old 09-20-2012, 05:09 PM   #48
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Looking for a thread just like this...thanks for the stories mamas. I am pretty much waiting for a miscarriage to start. I'm supposed to be 10 weeks but u/s yesterday showed no baby . I feel like a ticking time bomb, just waiting. I am spotting and it's turning more red, but no cramping. I'm just really hoping that this passes because taking cytotec doesn't appeal toe at all.
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Old 09-20-2012, 05:49 PM   #49
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Originally Posted by danimdel
Looking for a thread just like this...thanks for the stories mamas. I am pretty much waiting for a miscarriage to start. I'm supposed to be 10 weeks but u/s yesterday showed no baby . I feel like a ticking time bomb, just waiting. I am spotting and it's turning more red, but no cramping. I'm just really hoping that this passes because taking cytotec doesn't appeal toe at all.
oh I'm so sorry sweetie
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Old 09-27-2012, 01:03 PM   #50
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Re: What no one tells you about a miscarriage - graphic

I've been sitting here in tears for over an hour reading through the posts. Even though my m/c was over 4 years ago, it still haunts me to this day and I still ache for my babies.

This is my story. *Warning, LONG and somewhat graphic*
DH and I had been TTC for 2 years and 8 months when I finally got my BFP on Easter morning, 2008. I was sooo sooo excited and happy but also shocked because it felt surreal to finally be pregnant after all that time! At our first OB appt at 8 weeks we found out I was pregnant with what appeared to be identical twins. We got to hear both heartbeats and watch them move around and got lots and lots of u/s pictures. It was amazing. More shock and disbelief but incredible, intense excitement! I was so sure this was our reward for waiting so long and I immediately went home and started researching everything I could find out about twins. A few days later I woke up and had some spotting. DH and I had DTD for the first time and I'm still pretty convinced that's what it was from. To be on the safe side, I called my OB and he told me to go to the ER to get checked out. So, following the OB's orders like a good little lemming, I had DH came home from work and he took me to the ER. WORST.DECISION.OF.MY.LIFE. If I was ever given the option of a redo, I would pick that trip to the ER and never, ever go. If I am ever spotting again during a pregnancy, I will NEVER EVER go to the ER again. I will wait until I can get in with my regular OB but never go back to the ER! By the time we got there and I got into an exam room, my spotting had pretty much stopped. I felt fine and I figured they would take some blood, do a vaginal u/s, we'd get to see the babies and go on home. Not even close. They were a teaching hospital and so they had a nursing student there who put in a catheter. They filled my bladder with at least 1/2 a bag of saline and let me sit there like that for over an hour. They told me it would be a better u/s that way. I was miserable. I can handle some pain and I had tears rolling down my cheeks from how badly it hurt. I think she expanded the bulb too much on the catheter because I swear I had bleeding from my urinary tract after that and it hurt to pee for a long time. Anyway, they finally got me into radiology where they did the external u/s. More misery because she was pushing on my uterus/bladder area. BUT, the babies both had nice strong heartbeats. They both measured right on track and were both moving around and looked great. No signs of internal bleeding or anything. *relief* After they finally removed the catheter, took tons of blood, confirmed my HCG levels were still high and where they should be, did several pap smears and I can't even remember what all else, we went home. I was tired a little crampy that day but otherwise felt ok. The next day things started getting bad. I felt really tired and sickly all day. I started spotting by early afternoon again and then toward the evening passed a few small clots about the size of a pencil eraser. I started getting upset. That night I couldn't sleep I was so uncomfortable. I had cramps and pain in my back. I realized later I was in labor. I had a follow-up appointment with my OB the next morning at 7am. I went to the bathroom at 4am and passed a larger, grayish piece of tissue about the size of two fingers and knew I was going to lose my babies. I started crying and asked DH to call my friend to come get our older DS. We had originally thought we would take him with us so he could see the babies on u/s for the first time but because I knew it would be bad, I had my friend come get him. DH sat in the bathroom with me and he held me while I sat there and cried. We went on over to the OB's office around 6:30 and knocked on the door so they would let us in. We were the first patients there so we didn't have to wait at all. The doctor came in, did an u/s and confirmed our worst fears, both babies had died. I was completely numb and DH looked like he'd been hit by a Mack truck. He was ghost white. While the OB went to schedule an emergency D&C, I continued to labor and was in an intense amount of pain. All the sudden I told DH I had to go to the bathroom and as soon as I sat down, I delivered the babies and the placenta all at one time. I freaked out because I thought the toilet was an automatic flushing one and DH rushed in there to see what was going on. For a few seconds it was chaos until I realized it wasn't going to flush and the reality of what just happened hit me HARD. Everything got really quiet and somber and the OB just let DH and I sit in there and cry and hold each other. When I finally got up and went back in the exam room, I felt 1000% better physically but emotionally, I was totally overwhelmed. The OB came in and asked if we wanted to see the babies. I did and he brought them into me in a small white bucket. I only had a few short moments with them but I will never forget what they looked like. Two perfect little babies with arms, legs, eyes, fingers, toes, everything. I didn't want to let them go. The OB said he had to send them down to pathology. I think I just turned my head to DH and cried some more. A really sweet nurse came in to give me a shot of something to induce cramping and help to expel what might be left from "the products of conception". Later they wrote in my records that I had had a complete, spontaneous abortion. F&%$ers. I hate that word. Abortion. Like I had wanted it to happen. Nothing was wrong with my babies. They said the m/c was a result of an acute placental abruption. In other words, the placenta had started detaching from my uterus and that cased a blood clot. When one twin clotted and died, the other died because they were identical and shared the same placenta. The hospital covered their a$$es though and put that their zygosity was unknown. I looked up what a placental abruption was and I knew right away the trip to the ER caused it. I was in shock about what happened for at least two days afterward. I woke up thinking I was pregnant only to have reality come crashing down on me like lead rain that I wasn't. I bled and passed a few bigger clots but most of everything had passed at the office. In mid-May we had the babies cremated at a local funeral home and I still have their ashes in a little Willow Tree box in my safe. I also have death certificates for each of them. The funeral home was amazing. They host an annual walk of remembrance for all the lost babies and DH and I went two years in a row after we lost them. I have little things around my house that only I would know relate to my twins. I made a slide show set to music and I still cry on their due date and the day we lost them every year. Sometimes in between, like today, over four years later. I've had incredible comfort from friends and family and incredible heartbreak. I've heard everything from "Well at least it was early" to "Twins would have been really hard, you're lucky". But I've also had amazing support from the people who really count. DH is number one. He always leaves a note or a card for me on those days and is extra sweet to me. I guess I thought it would get easier in time and it has. But no matter how much time goes by, I'll never be able to forget or completely "get over" losing my babies.

Later on, about 6-7 months after the m/c we went to a lawyer about what had happened at the ER. Because we couldn't prove they had done anything "negligent" because my medical records were mysteriously "corrupted" and unreadable they wouldn't take the case. We left it at that.

So sorry for the book.
~Kristen~ Married to my & Airman James (01/03)
Mommy to Dakota (4/03), Colton (6/09) and Twincesses, Keira & Katelyn (7/13)
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