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Old 10-06-2012, 06:22 PM   #21
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Originally Posted by KaleidoscopeEyes

honestly if my DH was gone for 8 months im pretty sure DD would forget who he even was. i must have very unsophisticated children, even my 7 year old has never asked me what i do for work lol

in your case i dont know why you have to lie though. he's overseas doing a job and that's what i would tell the kids. IMO omitting something isnt lying
Ahhhh, okay. This is where semantics come in. I omit a the time and do not consider it lying. Many people do believe in the "lie by omission ." this is what I'm saying with the age appropriate stuff. I don't outright lie about important things but omit to make it age appropriate. Of course my kids don't know the gritty details of DHs job but I was under the impression that this omitting info to keep it at their level was considered lying :-)

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Old 10-06-2012, 07:24 PM   #22
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Re: The power of Santa...

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I think parents who say they never lie to their kids are either lying themselves or in denial. I tell outrageous lies to my kids all the time and it makes them laugh. I enjoy a silly, fun home environment so it's very common for me to tell a kid that if they don't stop misbehaving a turnip is going to sprout from their nose. If that means they will need therapy in late life, oh well...at least they'll have a good sense of humor.

I recently convinced my children that white bread was illegal. They wouldn't buy that it is just not good for us, when asking why we don't buy it more often. I blurted out that it was illegal and they believed me. To the point where DD now refers to it as "W.B." and when she spotted it in the bakery aisle she panicked that the store owners would get in trouble. My kids are going to need major therapy, but I still find it funny.

I personally don't use Santa that way, but I think sometimes a mama has to do what a mama has to do.

And, I do consider omitting information to be lying. I don't see how it is not a lie. So, yes, I think most of us lie to our kids about something because it just, plain is not appropriate for them to know all adult information.
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Old 10-06-2012, 07:36 PM   #23
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Re: The power of Santa...

I've never pulled the "I'm calling Santa" card. It's just as bad as "Just wait til your dad gets home" etc. Basically it's transferring the power of authority away from you and shows to your children that your are essentially not the one in charge, therefore perpetuating the cycle of misbehavior.

So, yeah, nope
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Old 10-06-2012, 07:37 PM   #24
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Re: The power of Santa...

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I recently convinced my children that white bread was illegal. They wouldn't buy that it is just not good for us, when asking why we don't buy it more often. I blurted out that it was illegal and they believed me. To the point where DD now refers to it as "W.B." and when she spotted it in the bakery aisle she panicked that the store owners would get in trouble. My kids are going to need major therapy, but I still find it funny.

I personally don't use Santa that way, but I think sometimes a mama has to do what a mama has to do.

And, I do consider omitting information to be lying. I don't see how it is not a lie. So, yes, I think most of us lie to our kids about something because it just, plain is not appropriate for them to know all adult information.
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Old 10-06-2012, 08:07 PM   #25
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Re: The power of Santa...

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Yes. For the record, I was joking. It was not malicious, or with intent to mislead them. But, I guess they didn't see the joke because they believed me. Now it has just gone on and on, without me even perpetuating it. And now it just funny. I am trying to correct it, as in, "Yes, it should be illegal..."
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Old 10-06-2012, 08:29 PM   #26
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Originally Posted by Geckmumto3

I recently convinced my children that white bread was illegal. They wouldn't buy that it is just not good for us, when asking why we don't buy it more often. I blurted out that it was illegal and they believed me. To the point where DD now refers to it as "W.B." and when she spotted it in the bakery aisle she panicked that the store owners would get in trouble. My kids are going to need major therapy, but I still find it funny.

I personally don't use Santa that way, but I think sometimes a mama has to do what a mama has to do.

And, I do consider omitting information to be lying. I don't see how it is not a lie. So, yes, I think most of us lie to our kids about something because it just, plain is not appropriate for them to know all adult information.
Lmao.

I think your children will survive.
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Old 10-06-2012, 08:36 PM   #27
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Originally Posted by DalesWidda
I've never pulled the "I'm calling Santa" card. It's just as bad as "Just wait til your dad gets home" etc. Basically it's transferring the power of authority away from you and shows to your children that your are essentially not the one in charge, therefore perpetuating the cycle of misbehavior.

So, yeah, nope
This is an interesting point of view.

I like it.
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Old 10-06-2012, 08:46 PM   #28
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Re: The power of Santa...

we dont do santa....but for this alone i wish we did fwiw i do tell my kids that when they misbehave i will tell daddy when he gets home. ehy? bc that makes them behave. when you have a baby who screams for 6-14(yes FOURTEEN) hours a day and you pump every 2 hours bc she cant suck the 6, 4, and 2 year old know you arent going to put down the screaming infant to put them in timeout i pick my battles right now.
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Old 10-06-2012, 08:53 PM   #29
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we dont do santa....but for this alone i wish we did fwiw i do tell my kids that when they misbehave i will tell daddy when he gets home. ehy? bc that makes them behave. when you have a baby who screams for 6-14(yes FOURTEEN) hours a day and you pump every 2 hours bc she cant suck the 6, 4, and 2 year old know you arent going to put down the screaming infant to put them in timeout i pick my battles right now.
We can't all be perfect, mama. I think you're doing just fine.
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Old 10-06-2012, 09:28 PM   #30
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Re: The power of Santa...

I don't use white lies to my parental advantage. Personally *I* would have several issues with it. For one, Santa is a lie, and I don't like lying. For another, what if the kid continues to misbehave after the threat? Would you REALLY not get her any presents? I don't like to put myself in that kind of position. If I make a threat, I am going to follow through. It's pretty harsh to not get your kid any gifts. So I wouldn't threaten it. For another thing, what do you do starting Dec. 26? Threaten next years Christmas? I would rather work on the misbehavior now and have it worked out by then. Threaten Santa doesn't really "fix" anything, it's more like a bandaid effect. You'll still have to deal with it later. I would rather deal now and get it over with. And I had never thought of it like pp did, about being the one in authority, but that's kind of true too.

I do think we all have to decide what works for us and do the best we can. So you do whatever works for you, and you'll get no judgement from me. But it's not something I would do.
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