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Old 10-25-2012, 11:46 AM   #1
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discipline....sneaky kids...help!!!

ok kids are 2, 4 and 6. we do not spank

one example:
went to grocery store last night. got kids 'special' cereal(chocolate) as a treat. put it on top of the fridge. this am got up to pump. fixed kids waffles and put them on the counter(they can get the yogurt themselves). i was pumping when they woke up and told them to go eat their food, at the table. come downstairs nad somehow they got the cereal off the top of the fridge nad between the 3 of them and the dog they ate the WHOLE BOX

another example:
a few days ago i was pumping(yes they wait until im pumping) and i told ds (2) to go wash his hands in the tub and come back. next thing i know they have flooded the bathroom all 3 got IN the tub and splashed water all over the floor.

they know i am pumping and i always have stuff for them to do(show, coloring, play dough, etc) so idk why they make messes but they know until im done pumping they are "safe" and then they get time out, have to clean up their messes, etc.

how do i stop this behavior??? should i just make them sit with me while i pump until they learn to behave?

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Old 10-25-2012, 11:54 AM   #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by shortcake2386
ok kids are 2, 4 and 6. we do not spank

one example:
went to grocery store last night. got kids 'special' cereal(chocolate) as a treat. put it on top of the fridge. this am got up to pump. fixed kids waffles and put them on the counter(they can get the yogurt themselves). i was pumping when they woke up and told them to go eat their food, at the table. come downstairs nad somehow they got the cereal off the top of the fridge nad between the 3 of them and the dog they ate the WHOLE BOX

another example:
a few days ago i was pumping(yes they wait until im pumping) and i told ds (2) to go wash his hands in the tub and come back. next thing i know they have flooded the bathroom all 3 got IN the tub and splashed water all over the floor.

they know i am pumping and i always have stuff for them to do(show, coloring, play dough, etc) so idk why they make messes but they know until im done pumping they are "safe" and then they get time out, have to clean up their messes, etc.

how do i stop this behavior??? should i just make them sit with me while i pump until they learn to behave?
I would expect your 4 and 6 year old to know better and be better examples to the 2 year old. A good consequence would be to make them clean up the mess they made, and not allow them the privilege of eating breakfast before you're done pumping, or not allow them into the bathroom alone for a while until they can show you they can tell themselves no. I'd make them sit with you while you pump and make it super boring. When my boys do stuff like this they lose the privilege of playing together since they were not being good examples to each other. I send one to their room and one in the living room to play alone.
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Old 10-25-2012, 11:55 AM   #3
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Re: discipline....sneaky kids...help!!!

I used to have "quiet" bucket and put special toys/snacks inside and whenever I had to be on the phone for an extended period of time or feed the baby I would have them go get their bucket (I used those big ice cream buckets with the lids and handles), and sit when I could see them. They only got their bucket during this time, had to be quiet and had to put it away when I was done. You have to take time to keep it updated but it worked like a charm Might be worth a try? Other than that I used to say, "Grab some books!" and they had to look at books by my feet.
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Old 10-25-2012, 11:59 AM   #4
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I would also make them sit with you while you pump. A 4 and 6 to are more than able to recognize and know they did wrong. I would also not buy the cereal again.

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Old 10-25-2012, 12:07 PM   #5
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Re: discipline....sneaky kids...help!!!

I have had some similar things happen around my house. Think filling up a rubermaid tote in a bedroom as s "tub" and sloshing all over the carpet
I can laugh about it now. I actually broke my little green trying to get the water out of the carpet.
our remedy or natural consequence was the DS1 was not allowed to be an a different floor than me for a while until he showed me he could make better decisions.
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Old 10-25-2012, 12:07 PM   #6
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Re: discipline....sneaky kids...help!!!

I would def make them sit with you while you pump. On the floor, criss-cross-apple-sauce, rdg a book, or sitting silently. And I would explain that they lost the privilege to play w/play dough, or watch a movie, or color while I was pumping BECAUSE of their bad behavior. I would make sure they were bored, and wouldn't allow any playing or fun activities while they are sitting with you.

This is a natural consequence of losing someone's trust, you lose privileges. The 8 and 4 yr old KNOW better than to do that stuff, and they are even old enough to stop the 2 yr old from getting into stuff, or at the VERY LEAST, telling you when the 2 y/o is up to something.

When my DD tells us a lie, she has to sit right next to us for a whole day (or two, depending) - as in, I go potty, she stands in the corner and waits, I wash dishes, she sits at my feet, I do laundry, she sits and watches. I know she is bored and I know she can't stand it, but when you break my trust, then I can't trust you at all, even to be alone for 2 seconds. That's what happens.

And in a way, IMO, this is deceptive b/c they are waiting until you are gone to misbehave. Not the EXACT same, obviously, but I think it is similar enough to treat it with the same method.
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Old 10-25-2012, 12:34 PM   #7
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Re: discipline....sneaky kids...help!!!

ok thanks. ill start making them stay with me until they can behave. and yes, the older 2 know better but they only 'tattle' when they are fighting so theres no chance of knowing 'who done it' i usually just punish all 3 instead of fighting to try to find out who did it, bc 99.9% of the time they wont tell anyways
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Old 10-25-2012, 02:52 PM   #8
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Re: discipline....sneaky kids...help!!!

Definitely the 2yr old isn't really instigating things - just going along with what looks like fun! The older 2 know better, though.

The cereal is easy - throw it all out and refuse to buy any more.

For a time, I would make them come and sit right with you while you pump. Won't be fun... for any of you, I don't imagine. But they'll get the clue that they can't be bad and get away with it.
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Old 10-25-2012, 06:42 PM   #9
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Re: discipline....sneaky kids...help!!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by canadianbakers View Post

For a time, I would make them come and sit right with you while you pump. Won't be fun... for any of you, I don't imagine. But they'll get the clue that they can't be bad and get away with it.
Yep that ^ It was what I was going to say. Have them sit in front of you while you pump but make sure you have a conversation about trust and they broke your trust which is why they need to earn it back. I would restrict more then just that time for a short while to get your point across. Perhaps asking for permission to do certain things? Each time they do well point out that they are earning your trust back then eventually give it another go! Good luck mama, we have all been there at some point, with me it was my siblings but I raised them so I feel your pain!
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Old 10-25-2012, 07:57 PM   #10
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Re: discipline....sneaky kids...help!!!

thanks ladies. i talked to dh and we realized they are bored. my 4 nieces moved out in may so now there are significantly less people to play with, so they are finding new ways to entertain tthemselves. not acceptable but at least we know why it started. fingers crossed it goes well.
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