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Old 11-17-2012, 10:01 PM   #11
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Re: Is there such a thing as a nice way to...

Originally Posted by Computermama View Post
Was this all they fed her? Did they give her any food not entirely made of sugar? If she had some good meals in there, I wouldn't be too mad, but if this is all she ate, something has to be said. I'd just be straight forward and say that you understand that part of being a grandparent is spoiling the grandchildren, but you would really appreciate it if they attempted to balance out the bad with some healthier stuff too - like even a glass of milk with the oreos.
Well, for lunch she DID get some green beans with her chicken nuggets. Not sure if that is enough to negate the rest of it, though...but it's something, right?

This isn't the first time this has concerned me - they do the same thing with their dog. They have a mini dachshund who is BEYOND morbidly obese (I think she's like 22lbs?) and they continuously feed her table scraps. FIL gives her ice cream nightly and often her treat is a plate of cottage cheese. She cannot get up and down stairs anymore, it's very sad. I don't want my kids to end up like that poor dog! I love my inlaws, they are great people and having them help us with childcare on the weekends is extremely helpful....but they are very unhealthy eaters, and it really bothers me that the sweets and treats are being pushed on to my kids now.


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Old 11-17-2012, 10:23 PM   #12
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I would not be nice about it either. Not at all. Thank goodness my MIL never watches my son, or I KNOW this would be an issue because they eat like crap. (Well, my FIL doesn't, but he has to shop and cook every meal for himself since he wants a decently healthy diet. Everyone else in their family is obese. ) I got upset with my parents when they tried to give DS fruit before we had really started solids (we started with veggies).

Originally Posted by megenic
When I'm a grandparent I vow to serve kale chips and homemade hummus.
My mom buys DH special whole wheat and oat pretzel sticks that no one else in the family is allowed to have. Hehe The sweetest thing he gets over there is a banana, and that is a treat reserved just for Mimi's house. She even made him carrot cake muffins sweetened with apples and frosting made from heavy cream and the teeniest drizzle of honey (I wanted plain cream, lol) for his first birthday. Yay for hummus and kale chips!

Last edited by KelseyH; 11-17-2012 at 10:25 PM.
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Old 11-17-2012, 10:39 PM   #13
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Re: Is there such a thing as a nice way to...

My kids see each set of their grandparents once every two weeks so I don't mind if they get junk when they're there. When we lived closer my in-laws would take the kids to McDonalds every weekend which I hated. I had my DH tell them to quit it.

Having your in-laws watch the kids is such a hard spot to be in. My mom used to watch my son when I worked part time and I always felt like I couldn't complain about little things she would do (mostly letting him watch tv) because she was giving up her time to watch my son for free.

I would send food to the in-laws and play it off as you wanted to pack lunches to make their lives easier (I did this with my mom). Or you could lie and say the kids' tummys really hurt and ask if they ate anything that could have caused it- maybe when your in-laws start naming off twinkies and ho-hos they'll realize the kids only eat junk when they're there. If you want the more forward approach have you DH tell them to cut back on the junk.
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Old 11-18-2012, 02:45 AM   #14
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Originally Posted by megenic
I wouldn't bother trying to be nice about that. Food is one of my wacko mama bear things and if someone fed my children that they would be getting an earful from me. I don't know WHY grandparents have this overwhelming desire to feed kids crap. When I'm a grandparent I vow to serve kale chips and homemade hummus.
Right? When I was a kid my mom only allowed me to have raisins and peanuts to snack on as a treat. Now it's as if whenever we are downtown she's all "let's stop and get the baby a cupcake!" it's like, who are you lady? My MIL only gives her juice and it drives me batty because I feel like I JUST told her that the dentist asked us to cut that from her diet.
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Old 11-18-2012, 06:37 AM   #15
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I certainly think you have the right to stop this. I'd make DH handle it though.
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Old 11-18-2012, 09:04 AM   #16
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Re: Is there such a thing as a nice way to...

Can't you just tell them you don't want them eating so much junk food?
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Old 11-18-2012, 09:20 AM   #17
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Re: Is there such a thing as a nice way to...

I would just be frank with them. That your child cannot have that kind of food and then provide them with a list of foods your child does eat.
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Old 11-18-2012, 09:43 AM   #18
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Re: Is there such a thing as a nice way to...

I know what you mean. They were fed a weeks worth of junk food in four hours, including some rather expensive cookies (that I had put up out of the way) that were a special treat for me and my fiancee.
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Old 11-18-2012, 09:51 AM   #19
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Re: Is there such a thing as a nice way to...

yikes. I try not to ask when my kids go to IL's b/c my MIL does the same thing. After Connor came home feeling barfy a few times though, I have started reminding him and IL's every time that he goes that he can't stomach too much sugar. But it doesn't happen too often and I don't let them have tons of sugar regularly so I try to just let it go. I've also been known to send a packed lunch "so they don't eat you out of house and home"
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Old 11-18-2012, 10:13 AM   #20
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Re: Is there such a thing as a nice way to...

I would be super upset. I am usually of the "let it go if it's an occasional thing" but honestly I couldn't let that list go even if it WAS an occasional thing. Much less every weekend for two days.

I would just be straight up with them and tell them you do not want her eating any more junk food when she is there outside of a cookie for dessert or something. That is just ridiculous. I would pack a lunch personally, so you know at least PART of what she's eating during the day. If you think they are the type to throw out the lunch and lie about what she ate anyways, I'd personally find other childcare arrangements because what else are they going against your wishes for?

Those that think this is just how grandparents are...yikes, I feel bad for ya'll! Neither of my parents feeds my son that kind of stuff when he's with them. The worst thing my kiddo has eaten with my mom would be something like a handful of cheese puffs with a good lunch and cheap sugar filled apple juice which isn't going to hurt him just wouldn't be m personal preference, and we've never even bought cheese puffs lol.

Last edited by Mom2Connor; 11-18-2012 at 10:16 AM.
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