Can I make a suggestion? :)

[Kaci]

Originally Posted by somo_chickenlady I'm hoping the ladies here would be mature enough to know that if they can't just agree or give support, they would choose not to participate in the discussion. Maybe just wishful thinking? lol

I've been on this board a long time. Since before it even was *this* board and there are many people here who pretty much only post to tell other people how to live. And this board has never done well with posters who just want hiney pats.

Personally IDC either way, but I really don't think JAWM will work with the dynamics here. Maybe all the newbies can prove me wrong

[somo_chickenlady]

Originally Posted by earthflower my first thought as well, along w/ controversial topics

I'm not sure, but I guess my thought is that just b/c someone makes a thread, doesn't mean you HAVE to respond to it. On the other board, it is never abused like that.

[earthflower]

I'm just saying people could easily abuse a system like that, posting threads just to hit a nerve or being able to post hot button topics and its only one-sided because y'all have to agree with OP or not post at all. Seems also away to be able push one's beliefs out there knowing they can't get called out.

[somo_chickenlady]

I guess I just have more faith in these ladies than that. It would only work if everyone allowed it to work. You never know unless you try it.

[EmmaGM]

Originally Posted by earthflower I'm just saying people could easily abuse a system like that, posting threads just to hit a nerve or being able to post hot button topics and its only one-sided because y'all have to agree with OP or not post at all. Seems also away to be able push one's beliefs out there knowing they can't get called out.

I think that pretty much already happens. As an example, anti-circ threads with a disclaimer saying they're for anti-circ discussion only. Come in and argue, get reported to mods.

[kaia.aline]

I don't think it would work here

[somo_chickenlady]

Originally Posted by EmmaGM I think that pretty much already happens. As an example, anti-circ threads with a disclaimer saying they're for anti-circ discussion only. Come in and argue, get reported to mods.

Yeah, those kind of threads happen already, and besides...it's just a phrase. If what they are talking about is really THAT bad, it will probably get locked anyway. Plus, it just notifies people that they don't want to argue or get advice. I'm sure, from what you all are saying, that some people will do it anyway, but for those of us that WILL actually listen and respect that, I think it would work.

[joyful mother]

What if it was a section called Venting? An opt in forum, you don't abide by the rules, you don't get to play.
First rule is you respect a vent and only offer support.
Second rule you can not pick any of the topics in ~happy2Bamommy~ the supermod's signature. I can't find her old siggy it said if you want a hot discussion (or something like this) pick one of these topics. It had circumcision, vaccines, spanking, homebirths, duggars, etc.

I think if people just said I am really upset my MIL is not respecting our choices, even if they said "about circumcision" the focus is on the lack of respect, not circumcision (the hot button topic). If instead you said my MIL wants be to brutalize my child and have him cirumcized, you are pushing buttons. It could work but there would have to be some monitoring for a time. Which is why I think a separate forum would be perfect, repeat offenders just don't get to play. It would be lovely to be able to complain about someone not respecting your choices without it becoming a heated thread.

[somo_chickenlady]

Sometimes a JAWM post isn't a vent, though. What if someone had something happen to them and they just want support, not advice. I don't think that would fit in a vent forum. I posted something along those lines once, and got a ton of advice I wasn't looking for. I simply just didn't respond to those posts but they hurt me more than they helped me (my post was about us stopping TTC after 12 years), and if someone says it is a JAWM post people will know ahead of time that they don't want any advice.

A forum like you suggested would be nice, though. Kind of like the SS board.

[EmmaGM]

Originally Posted by somo_chickenlady Yeah, those kind of threads happen already, and besides...it's just a phrase. If what they are talking about is really THAT bad, it will probably get locked anyway. Plus, it just notifies people that they don't want to argue or get advice. I'm sure, from what you all are saying, that some people will do it anyway, but for those of us that WILL actually listen and respect that, I think it would work.

I agree.