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Old 11-19-2012, 10:53 PM   #11
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Re: Need Help. Does OB's plan sound right? How can I go the natural route?

Why don't you get a second doctor's opinion?

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Old 11-19-2012, 10:54 PM   #12
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Originally Posted by Dani_Phen

I've asked a ton of questions but it just seems like she's trying to push medication on me. We were just starting to try and she told me I'd probably need medication to conceive. I ignored and we started trying. 5 months in we didn't get a positive and she was wanting to start me on fertility meds. I wanted to wait b/c really....5 months isn't terribly long. The end of November marks a full year of TTC and she started me on meds by pushing and pushing and pushing until I finally agreed on November 5th. She got flustered and acted like I was from space when I asked about going a more natural route and then she ignored my question and went on to say, "so this is what we're going to do....start provera Nov 5 after you have a blood preg test on the 1st and it's negative....we are pretty sure of this because you didn't ovulate in October (by way of low progest in bloodwork)." She acts like my opinions don't matter and she's the expert so that's what I'm to do.

I use opk's. I've no idea how to track my cycles. I know a little about cervical mucous and nothing about charting temp. I've heard of but never read that book. I'll check into it. Thanks
The standard - as I've understood it from talking to my friends - around my area is that couples try for one full year before their doctor will suggest/allow intervention. Unless one of you is over a certain age or there are known factors that could interfere with fertility. So it does seem odd to me that she's so set on starting medication right away. But maybe she's counting back for you to back in 2011 when you were NTNP.

And totally get that book! You can probably find it cheap on amazon, eBay, or maybe even at your library. And there is a computer program you can get that keeps track f your data and does the charting for you. I loved it!

We used it for over two years while tta, and then on our first try got pg with dd. I haven't been doing t this time around bc my sleep is so crazy which can throw off temps. But I've been going just on cervical mucous and my dd is 18 mos and so far no baby #3. (

Although I am on cd 35.... 0_o waiting for AF or a BFP)
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Old 11-19-2012, 10:56 PM   #13
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One thing you might consider as well, is whether her approach is a good fit for your goals when it comes to birthing as well. I would assume that her style and approach would transfer over to how she handles prenatal care and labor/delivery, so that's important to consider as you're thinking about the kind of birth you're aiming for. Obviously you can't control every minute detail, but being "in sync" with your care provider and having that foundation of mutual trust and respect goes a long way to making for a positive birth experience.
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Old 11-19-2012, 11:19 PM   #14
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Re: Need Help. Does OB's plan sound right? How can I go the natural route?

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What's weird is I could NOT get clomid or anything even after years of trying and 70 day cycles. It's so weird how different drs work.
Yes. Definitely!

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Originally Posted by Steph Ed View Post
Why don't you get a second doctor's opinion?
She's asked 3 other OB's opinions and they all seem to have the same basic opinions...I'm not sure where to even start as far as OB's in our new area.

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Originally Posted by BeccaSueCongdon View Post
The standard - as I've understood it from talking to my friends - around my area is that couples try for one full year before their doctor will suggest/allow intervention. Unless one of you is over a certain age or there are known factors that could interfere with fertility. So it does seem odd to me that she's so set on starting medication right away. But maybe she's counting back for you to back in 2011 when you were NTNP.

And totally get that book! You can probably find it cheap on amazon, eBay, or maybe even at your library. And there is a computer program you can get that keeps track f your data and does the charting for you. I loved it!

We used it for over two years while tta, and then on our first try got pg with dd. I haven't been doing t this time around bc my sleep is so crazy which can throw off temps. But I've been going just on cervical mucous and my dd is 18 mos and so far no baby #3. (

Although I am on cd 35.... 0_o waiting for AF or a BFP)
To the bolded. That's what she told me too BUT she's not exactly going with it herself it seems. I looked on amazon and found one for $13. I will place an order tomorrow probably. I had MASSIVE amounts of white mucous two days before starting provera and then it turned to massive amounts of EWCM for a day then I started provera and within 3 days it was all gone. I was so confused. I probably O'd then and missed an egg! Darn it.

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One thing you might consider as well, is whether her approach is a good fit for your goals when it comes to birthing as well. I would assume that her style and approach would transfer over to how she handles prenatal care and labor/delivery, so that's important to consider as you're thinking about the kind of birth you're aiming for. Obviously you can't control every minute detail, but being "in sync" with your care provider and having that foundation of mutual trust and respect goes a long way to making for a positive birth experience.
I delivered Ds with them. Basically you see whoever is available unless you request someone. I request her because she seemed to be giving solid good advice before. All the other one's I've seen don't seem to really be into their patients. They don't remember you (and neither does she, really). Each time I go in I explain to her what's been going on and she flips back through and reads my file then goes "Ok, so you've done...?" and it's like she really doesn't remember me at all.

Delivery with Ds was just ok...the OB who delivered him had me pushing before I was fully dialated at almost 10cm to soften it up more and then she had me pushing for 1.5 hour on my back and I didn't need to push yet. It wasn't time. I told her it wasn't but she ignored me because she was in a hurry. After 1.5 hours she told me to take a break and tried to get me to do a c section that she'd have to squeeze me into between the one in at that moment and the girl scheduled after the one in there but could do it easily which made me nervous so I refused and she seemed annoyed. When she came back a couple of mins later, she had me lay on my side and push. I didn't need to yet and told her so. She told me to push anyway. Ds's head wasn't even in the canal yet. Suddenly almost 2 hours of pushing later I got that sudden urge that it was time to push and I needed to push so I pushed and he was born with 3 quick pushes. She pulled the placenta out instead of letting it be delivered. She tossed him on me and didn't even look where she was tossing and he almost slid right off of me to the floor. I had to catch him.

After typing all of that out....overall I'm not pleased with anyone in the practice there, I suppose. They all seem to just want to do things quick and fast and like they don't have time to figure out the real problem. Something just doesn't feel right about all these meds...I mean, that's going to be 5 different medications within two months time. That can't be good for my body to go through and I feel like they are just wanting me to go the quick and easy route without figureing out the real problem, you know?
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Old 11-20-2012, 12:05 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dani_Phen

Yes. Definitely!

She's asked 3 other OB's opinions and they all seem to have the same basic opinions...I'm not sure where to even start as far as OB's in our new area.

To the bolded. That's what she told me too BUT she's not exactly going with it herself it seems. I looked on amazon and found one for $13. I will place an order tomorrow probably. I had MASSIVE amounts of white mucous two days before starting provera and then it turned to massive amounts of EWCM for a day then I started provera and within 3 days it was all gone. I was so confused. I probably O'd then and missed an egg! Darn it.

I delivered Ds with them. Basically you see whoever is available unless you request someone. I request her because she seemed to be giving solid good advice before. All the other one's I've seen don't seem to really be into their patients. They don't remember you (and neither does she, really). Each time I go in I explain to her what's been going on and she flips back through and reads my file then goes "Ok, so you've done...?" and it's like she really doesn't remember me at all.

Delivery with Ds was just ok...the OB who delivered him had me pushing before I was fully dialated at almost 10cm to soften it up more and then she had me pushing for 1.5 hour on my back and I didn't need to push yet. It wasn't time. I told her it wasn't but she ignored me because she was in a hurry. After 1.5 hours she told me to take a break and tried to get me to do a c section that she'd have to squeeze me into between the one in at that moment and the girl scheduled after the one in there but could do it easily which made me nervous so I refused and she seemed annoyed. When she came back a couple of mins later, she had me lay on my side and push. I didn't need to yet and told her so. She told me to push anyway. Ds's head wasn't even in the canal yet. Suddenly almost 2 hours of pushing later I got that sudden urge that it was time to push and I needed to push so I pushed and he was born with 3 quick pushes. She pulled the placenta out instead of letting it be delivered. She tossed him on me and didn't even look where she was tossing and he almost slid right off of me to the floor. I had to catch him.

After typing all of that out....overall I'm not pleased with anyone in the practice there, I suppose. They all seem to just want to do things quick and fast and like they don't have time to figure out the real problem. Something just doesn't feel right about all these meds...I mean, that's going to be 5 different medications within two months time. That can't be good for my body to go through and I feel like they are just wanting me to go the quick and easy route without figureing out the real problem, you know?
It sounds like you have a gut feeling about this already. :-)

I'm excited to hear what you think about the TCOYF book. It looks a little intimidating, but once you get the hang of it things will be second nature.

Regarding your CM: ewcm lasting for only three days isn't out of the norm. Usually the ewcm is the most fertile possible quaility(aka - friendliest to sperm) and happens the few days before you O. For most women you can assume that the first day of NON-ewcm after a day or more of it means you o'd. Once you O your body sort of locks things back down really fast and it can go from lots of ewcm to non-fertile quality.

Since you guys are trying to conceive, a good approach for now would be to baby-dance at the first sight and ewcm. Then as you get more familiar with your charting and your pattern you'll be able to almost pinpoint it within a day or two. :-) And if you aren't ovulating you'll see that too.

Did I read correctly that you're not having a regular AF as well?
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Old 11-20-2012, 06:28 AM   #16
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Re: Need Help. Does OB's plan sound right? How can I go the natural route?

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It sounds like you have a gut feeling about this already. :-)

I'm excited to hear what you think about the TCOYF book. It looks a little intimidating, but once you get the hang of it things will be second nature.

Regarding your CM: ewcm lasting for only three days isn't out of the norm. Usually the ewcm is the most fertile possible quaility(aka - friendliest to sperm) and happens the few days before you O. For most women you can assume that the first day of NON-ewcm after a day or more of it means you o'd. Once you O your body sort of locks things back down really fast and it can go from lots of ewcm to non-fertile quality.

Since you guys are trying to conceive, a good approach for now would be to baby-dance at the first sight and ewcm. Then as you get more familiar with your charting and your pattern you'll be able to almost pinpoint it within a day or two. :-) And if you aren't ovulating you'll see that too.

Did I read correctly that you're not having a regular AF as well?

I've not had a good feeling all along about doing medications and I don't feel 100% with the care there.

Thanks for the info!!

To the last Q. No. I only get AF once or twice a year at most. If I'm lucky I get it 3 times. One year I had it for 3 months straight and then nothing for a long time. Typically it's once or twice a year and only lasts for 3-5 days and is fairly light. I had it in June of 2010 after a year of no AF then got preggo in October of 2010. After PP bleeding was over (2.5 weeks of pp bleeding)in late July of 2011, I had gotten one then November of 2011 then we started trying and I've had one since and it was in October 2012 due to a chemical pregnancy, supposedly. As far as we know I've only O'd once in the last year.
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Old 11-20-2012, 06:46 AM   #17
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Have you heard of NaPro technology? I dont know much about it because there aren't any doctors in my area who practice it. From what I remember I think it sounds more like what you are wanting regarding care/treatment. The idea is to find the underlying cause of the fertility problem and treat that so that you conceive naturally. For example, doc says you dont weigh enough (just an example), and then puts you on a plan to gain more weight. Again, it might be hocuspocus- I didnt do it. It might be worth a look.
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Old 11-20-2012, 06:52 AM   #18
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Re: Need Help. Does OB's plan sound right? How can I go the natural route?

Having dealt with 6 years of secondary IF I can tell you that my experience says it's pretty common to go meds/treatments without necessarily know exactly what is wrong. There are two reasons for this.

A) most women dealing with infertility don't actually care WHAT is wrong, they just want a baby. Many women just want to feel like SOMETHING is being done and don't feel like testing testing testing is really all that productive.

B) many times, the various treatments for different causes is still the same. We don't know the actual real reason for our secondary IF. There were a couple of different ideas, from male factor IF to high FSH numbers that came back on a blood test. But the treatments for the different things they thought we might be dealing with were all the same. So we went ahead with the IUI and then IVF. And when we did the IVF they told us that we were unlikely to ever conceive on our own. And then we went on to have two more surprises. These docs were fertility specialists, and they were still just guessing. Because unfortunately in the world of infertility, there's still a lot that is just a guess.
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Old 11-20-2012, 07:13 AM   #19
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Re: Need Help. Does OB's plan sound right? How can I go the natural route?

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Have you heard of NaPro technology? I dont know much about it because there aren't any doctors in my area who practice it. From what I remember I think it sounds more like what you are wanting regarding care/treatment. The idea is to find the underlying cause of the fertility problem and treat that so that you conceive naturally. For example, doc says you dont weigh enough (just an example), and then puts you on a plan to gain more weight. Again, it might be hocuspocus- I didnt do it. It might be worth a look.
Never heard of it. I'll have to look into it and see. Thanks.

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Having dealt with 6 years of secondary IF I can tell you that my experience says it's pretty common to go meds/treatments without necessarily know exactly what is wrong. There are two reasons for this.

A) most women dealing with infertility don't actually care WHAT is wrong, they just want a baby. Many women just want to feel like SOMETHING is being done and don't feel like testing testing testing is really all that productive.

B) many times, the various treatments for different causes is still the same. We don't know the actual real reason for our secondary IF. There were a couple of different ideas, from male factor IF to high FSH numbers that came back on a blood test. But the treatments for the different things they thought we might be dealing with were all the same. So we went ahead with the IUI and then IVF. And when we did the IVF they told us that we were unlikely to ever conceive on our own. And then we went on to have two more surprises. These docs were fertility specialists, and they were still just guessing. Because unfortunately in the world of infertility, there's still a lot that is just a guess.
Thanks. I've been having tests run in total since I was 16...so for almost 10 years. At first I was told that I would probably never have children and was tested on and off for 5-6 years then Dh and I got preggo without much trouble at all. I was told that maybe I am Oing and all this. Now since last November and so many tests, it's been "Oh, you aren't Oing. You have somewhere around a 5ish% chance of conceiving on your own and here take these drugs...theyll help" type deal. I just feel like no one knows what's wrong or what needs to happen. You are right, I guess. Maybe I am just frustrated that they don't know more and really it's probably not their fault. I just feel as though she's tossing rings and hoping to get a ringer eventually and that's what I was doing before the fertility meds. It's not helping that the last 2 months, she's told me...I believe this is your month!! with excitement and I know she's trying to make me feel better but it's making me more depressed.


I'm starting to think that it's all in God's hands and we can't play God in all of this. I talked with Hubby last night about it and we decided to keep the meds she prescribed for future use but not use them yet. I'm going to call her today and let her know I'm not going to do this anymore. We've decided to go back to doing fertilitea, vitex, a healthy lifestyle and just pray. We did get preggo in September doing it that way (though it was a chem and didn't stick) so I feel that the natural route might be better. Anyone know how I can boost my estrogen naturally? I might research more but I believe soy beans are supposed to help with estrogen so I'm going to research and then maybe buy some dried to snack on.
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Old 11-20-2012, 07:50 AM   #20
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Re: Need Help. Does OB's plan sound right? How can I go the natural route?

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Never heard of it. I'll have to look into it and see. Thanks.



Thanks. I've been having tests run in total since I was 16...so for almost 10 years. At first I was told that I would probably never have children and was tested on and off for 5-6 years then Dh and I got preggo without much trouble at all. I was told that maybe I am Oing and all this. Now since last November and so many tests, it's been "Oh, you aren't Oing. You have somewhere around a 5ish% chance of conceiving on your own and here take these drugs...theyll help" type deal. I just feel like no one knows what's wrong or what needs to happen. You are right, I guess. Maybe I am just frustrated that they don't know more and really it's probably not their fault. I just feel as though she's tossing rings and hoping to get a ringer eventually and that's what I was doing before the fertility meds. It's not helping that the last 2 months, she's told me...I believe this is your month!! with excitement and I know she's trying to make me feel better but it's making me more depressed.


I'm starting to think that it's all in God's hands and we can't play God in all of this. I talked with Hubby last night about it and we decided to keep the meds she prescribed for future use but not use them yet. I'm going to call her today and let her know I'm not going to do this anymore. We've decided to go back to doing fertilitea, vitex, a healthy lifestyle and just pray. We did get preggo in September doing it that way (though it was a chem and didn't stick) so I feel that the natural route might be better. Anyone know how I can boost my estrogen naturally? I might research more but I believe soy beans are supposed to help with estrogen so I'm going to research and then maybe buy some dried to snack on.
This is totally what I was going to say! We tried for a year to get preggo with our DD. When we finally did what you said here we got pregnant the next month.

btw....if you have an android based phone or kindle fire I know you can get a free app that is called My Days that will help you keep track of when your periods are, temps, weight, CM, estimates your best days of Oing, and allows you to input which days exactly you DTD so that you can maximize your chances of ttc. I just started using it and it seems great. I'm sure you can get something very similar for an iphone or ipad too.
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